


Inktober but not 'cause it's one shots instead.

by Iwassupposedtostudy



Category: Gentleman Jack (TV)
Genre: Anyway Hemingway, Childhood, F/F, Fluff, I cannot draw to save my life so I did this instead for inktober, MAKES ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE, Overuse of any phrase done in Gentleman Jack, Please Don't Take This Seriously, Romance, This Is STUPID, i don't know how to tag, one shots, this is just for fun
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:54:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 52,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27101518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iwassupposedtostudy/pseuds/Iwassupposedtostudy
Summary: So my friend talked about doing inktober and I thought to myself what a fun thing to do. Then I did one drawing, cried my eyes out because it was so ugly and decided to write crappy one shots instead. Now some of the prompts didn't work with Gentleman Jack, so I used some old ones for those. Now bear in mind, this is all done for a bit of a laugh - I am not claiming this to be canon in any way at all. It's just one shots done for the prompts to pass my time =)Also a disclaimer - I have taken inspiration from incorrectgentlemanjackquotes Tumblr and used those quotes in some of the one shots - as I said this is not a serious work - just a fun thing I did. Hope it's enjoyable, some of it anyways.
Relationships: Anne Lister (1791-1840)/Ann Walker (1803-1854)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 74





	1. Fish

It was a warm summers day and it was really far too hot to be inside were the wood had been heated for months and now made it unbearably warm during the days in some of the rooms.   
Anne was currently forced to sit still in the sitting room of Shibden hall with her mother, aunt and on the floor sat her baby sister, Marian playing with a doll. They had decided that today was as good a day as any to sit and do embroidery, something which Anne had no want to do. She found it repetitive and boring, it was too idle work for her liking, and she ended up ruining it time and time again. But her mother had told her to sit still or she would give her a ‘lecture’ she soon would forget when they were alone in their quarters for the evening. Anne gazed longingly out of the window and saw Samuel, her two years younger brother, playing with a wooden sword, duelling against John – her youngest brother. How jealous she was of them at that moment. Swinging the sword about – Anne could be better at it than them, and she could shoot straighter than them too. But no, embroidery was her lot in life as a young lady. At eleven years of age – Anne found herself constricted and as if she couldn’t breathe most of the time. She had to wear a corset now, her mother had decided as she had noticed breasts changing Anne’s former flat chest. Anne hated the corset to start with and still found it uncomfortable if strung too tight. She longed to be free again, free of this prison. She wanted nothing more than to sneak out to play with Sam and John or sneak up to her uncle’s study to read whatever interesting topics one could find in there. But she daren’t as her mother was never one to stand done from a punishment. The various scars covering the small of Anne’s back showed that. Now, Anne didn’t mind her aunt’s company but, for the duration of the summer when they would stay at her aunt and uncle’s, she liked to be away from her mother as much as possible. She found it relaxing not to be constantly judged, criticised and beaten up.   
“Anne, do not slop.” Her mother barked at her and Anne fought an urge to roll her eyes but sat up straighter in her chair, she knew better than to contradict her mother.   
“I really don’t know what to make of her sometimes. She is such a nuisance, so odd – she will no doubt be a burden. Who will take her of our hands?” Her mother told her aunt who became seemingly uncomfortable by her mother’s words. Her aunt tried to talk some sense in reply, but her mother waved her hand, shaking her head,   
“No need to say sweet nothings about her for my sake. She is as queer as they come. A freak of nature. Hopefully Marian will turn out better. She is already showing so much potential at five.”  
Anne pretended not to hear, staring at her stitches, but tears prickled her eyes and it was hard to see through the mist of tears that threatened to fall from her dark orbs.   
  
Soon enough her uncle came inside the sitting room and he greeted them warmly, and Anne looked up at him and he could see the unshed tears in her eyes. He hunched down in front of her, placing a warm hand on her knee,   
“Could you come with me, Anne?”   
Anne’s eyes flickered from her uncle’s kind dark orbs – they looked just like hers, to her mother who at the moment weren’t aware of her.   
“I want to but…” Anne whispered, barely opening her mouth to speak the words and her uncle touched her cheek, smiling at her, before standing up to his full height – a very tall man her uncle, and turning to his sister and his sister-in-law, he said,  
“Rebecca, might I borrow my niece for a while?”   
Her mother looked startled at being spoken too, but glared at Anne soon after,   
“You might as well take Sam if you want any help. She is no good.”   
“Ah, yes, but young Samuel is helping young John practicing his fencing and I think Anne will do just fine.” Uncle James insisted and her mother rolled her eyes,   
“Take her for all I care. But don’t tell me I didn’t warn you when she messes up whatever it is, you’re doing.”   
“I’m sure we will do fine. Come on, Anne.” Uncle James offered his hand and Anne smiled for the first time that morning – finally she was to be released from that hot and tiresome sitting room – and most of all she would be free of her mother for a while at least.   
Uncle James led her outside, and they embarked upon the road leading towards the mines, Anne glanced up at her uncle carefully,  
“What are we doing?”   
“I could see that you were bored. And anyway, I don’t think embroidery will do you any good child. You are far too intelligent for that. Why your Greek is impeccable! – Soon enough you could hold up to any Cambridge student. But I thought both you and I could use some time away from everyone.” Uncle James told her, and Anne’s heart swelled with pride at his praise. She had been up early every morning studying subjects that seemed interesting to her. Classical literature was one – and if one wanted the full stories, one must know Greek, Latin and French, and Anne was a diligent student.   
“Do you think I’d ever be able to attend university instead of being sent to a boring girl’s school?” Anne asked quietly afraid that her uncle might laugh at her or wave off his praise as mere courtesy. Uncle James eyed her sadly,   
“I’m sorry to say that I do not believe that to be possible. Maybe in another lifetime. However, do not weep Annie, I will teach you anything I can, that I learnt, and you will be as good as any Cambridge graduate… or better.”   
“Would you?!” Anne cried gleefully and her uncle laughed,   
“Hm? Of course, I would. You are a bright pupil and I will enjoy it thoroughly, I’m sure.”   
They arrived at the lake and Anne was still not sure what he wanted them to do. She was much too old, or rather far too matured to swim. They hadn’t done that for two years, and, she thought sadly, would probably never do again. Her uncle however, pointed at a boat,   
“I thought we could go fishing, would you like that, Anne?”   
“Anything is better than embroidery… and being with my mother.” Anne whispered the last, but she was certain her uncle had heard her for he scoffed under his breath to conceal laughter. He helped her into the boat and pushed it out before jumping in himself. The fishing rods were all in the boat and Anne felt pretty excited at the prospect of fishing as she had never done that before. Her uncle showed how to ready the fishing rod with the bait. Anne mimicked him and then they threw it over the sides of the boat.   
“Now we wait. I find fishing calming. It requires some patience, but I think the reward is worth it.” Uncle James told her, and Anne nodded,  
“If I catch one – I need to break its neck, right?”   
“Hm. Yes. Unless it’s very small – then just throw it back.”   
They sat in comfortable silence, listening to the sounds of the nature surrounding them, and Anne felt as though she could breathe properly. All though a nagging thought was at the back of her head, the fact that soon, in less than a fortnight Anne would have to return home to Market Weighton, and her mother would be much more constant in her ‘lectures’ and she would hardly have peace – her mother found fault in everything she did, blaming her for being a girl and somehow also for her older brother’s death – and he died before she was born. To be candid, she blamed Anne for everything that went wrong. For the baby, Jeremy, who had died the year before et cetera. Anne had rather leave and live with her Aunt and Uncle, that way they, her parents needn’t be burdened with her and she would be free of blame.   
“A penny for your thoughts?” Uncle James spoke softly, and Anne shook her head as if to rid herself of the thoughts,   
“I just… thought about leaving.”   
“Already fed up with us?” Uncle James smirked, but Anne shook her head decidedly,   
“No! Never! I just… wish I could stay.”   
Uncle James mouth turned down and he frowned sadly,   
“We wish you could stay too Annie. If it were up to me… but anyway. I’m glad you’re here now. Your aunt is too.”   
“Mm.” Anne murmured, clearly distraught about the prospect of going home, of leaving Shibden and her aunt and uncle behind until Christmas. Suddenly her string began tugging and her uncle startled,  
“Anne – you’ve got one! Reel him in!”   
Anne’s heart pounded in her chest as she carefully, reeled the fish in just as her uncle had showed her. It was a medium sized carp. It fluttered about but Anne took a steady grip on it and broke its neck and it stopped immediately. She flashed white teeth towards her uncle who threw his arm around her and gave her a kiss on the forehead,   
“Excellent! Fantastic job, Annie. Put him in the bucket and then put new bait on the hook before throwing it back in.”   
Anne felt proud at her catch – the first catch of the day nonetheless, and all thoughts of her mother and leaving lay far away. She was happy, and carefree there out on the lake with her uncle. And as the sun danced on the water around them, she thought she would always wish it was so; Just her and her uncle every afternoon out on the lake – fishing together.   
“I wish it was always like this.” Anne began, “Just you and me, uncle.”   
“Of course, me and you Annie – just me and you.” Uncle James replied softly, and they stayed out on the lake for the remainder of that afternoon and didn’t come back home until the sun had begun to set.   



	2. Dragonfly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt number 2: Dragonfly 
> 
> Another blast to the past, young Anne and her Uncle hunt for dragonflies, and her mother is still... a terrible mother.  
> Seriously I don't know what this is.

If there was ever a time of the year when Anne was excited it was when they packed up for summer and travelled to her aunt and uncle at Shibden Hall in Halifax. As opposed to that, there was never a time she was more inconsolable than when they had to leave after summer.   
But today was one of those early summer days and they were currently nearing Shibden. Anne could hardly contain herself in the carriage – she was bursting with excitement and her mother found it extremely annoying. Anne looked out the window and saw Shibden appear in the distance and she smiled wide,   
“Look – Sam, we’re almost there!”   
Samuel pressed his face up the window on the other side and smiled at his older sister, and John pulled at Samuel’s arm, trying to get a glance himself of the house. Anne squinted, trying to calculate what the distance left were,   
“I say we are approximately…”   
She was interrupted by a stinging slap to her face given by her mother, and was startled at that, but her mother merely growled,   
“I told you to shut your mouth until we get there.”   
Anne opened her mouth to speak, but her mother raised her hand again and she decided against it. Instead she leaned on her elbow and stared out of the window. She could see Sam wanted to comfort her – he was so sensitive to violence. Ironic she thought, that his destiny would be the army. If she could take her brother’s place, she would. John however leaned over Sam to be able to stare out of the small window of the carriage – unaware of the tension inside. Marian was chatting on with their mother as she had done for the whole journey, but their mother didn’t seem to mind that. Only Anne and Samuel had shared various looks of annoyance at it, thinking their younger sister irksome but both knew better than to say anything about it. Sam because he knew Anne would be blamed and thrashed and Anne because, well because she would be thrashed. Or actually no, she would be lectured with the belt – her mother daren’t use anything else at Shibden in case anyone noticed – for which Anne was thankful. The belt was better than the cane, and much better than the horsewhip.  
Anne thought they would be there in approximately ten minutes now, but she hoped it would be faster for she couldn’t stand another minute in the carriage with her mother. Who, though she had sobered up during the journey, had been drunk since the morning. Marian’s endless chatter was just the tip of the iceberg, but nevertheless the looks she sent her way, the ones that said ‘look, I can talk, you can’t’ were enough to have Anne on the verge of hitting her seven-year-old sister. She didn’t. Because her mother would’ve beaten her to death and her father would’ve averted his eyes and said afterwards ‘Oh, how unfortunate’. He wasn’t even in the carriage- he sat up with their groom to get some fresh air, or rather to escape them and the cramped carriage for a while. Bile rose in Anne’s throat and she frowned, looking out of the window. Why did her mother hate her? – She couldn’t remember a time when she hadn’t hit her or sneered at her.   
“Samuel, when we get there you will behave and act as the perfect gentleman.” Their mother said suddenly, and both him and Anne turned their eyes from the window. Samuel raised an eyebrow, but he complied, because he knew that if he were bad – Anne would get beat up for something in the end of the day.  
“Yes, mother.”   
“You will be kind to your aunt and help your uncle. Understood?” She looked at him seriously, and Sam nodded diligent,   
“Of course, mother. I will be good.”  
“I will be better!” John shouted, currently in a phase were he tried to best his elder brother in everything.   
“Why must Sam be good, mama?” Marian asked curiously and if Anne had asked that same question, she would’ve been slapped in the face for being too nosey, Anne thought bitterly as their mother’s face softened,   
“Your uncle is unmarried and have no children of his own. The estate should therefore fall to Samuel. We must make sure it does.”   
Anne glared out of the window at this, anger rising within her, because she found it disgusting and mercenary what her mother did. Her uncle should be able to leave the estate to whoever. All though Anne wanted nothing more than to live at Shibden Hall with her aunt and uncle – away from her mother. And she thought, why should Sam have it when he didn’t love it as well as she did? Sam was a good boy, and she loved her brother, but he didn’t appreciate it as she did. Not the stay nor the place. He used to say that he should like to knock most of it down and rebuild it in a modern stone. Anne was appalled at that prospect and for that reason alone prayed that her uncle would rather leave it with a distant relative – so long as nothing was demolished. No, Anne’s excitement had been dimmed. She didn’t want to be part of this stupid scheme her mother had. She just wanted to be able to enjoy Shibden – her aunt and uncle without feeling as though it were all part of a plan to land them with their ancestral home in the end.   
  
They arrived as Anne had calculated, about ten minutes later and her uncle and aunt stood waiting for them outside with the servants behind them. Anne was getting ready to leap out of the carriage, but her mother stopped her with a hand that accidently, or perhaps it was calculated, went and bruised her lip.   
“You are not first off this carriage, Anne. By God, sit down and you aren’t to leave before I say so.”   
Anne slumped down in her seat again, with her arms crossed, and as the carriage stopped Samuel and John jumped out without reprimand, or rather pressed out the door at the same time, after which Marian followed and then their mother.   
She could hear them talk gaily and exchange greetings and suddenly the sounds and voices died. But her mother had yet to tell her to leave the carriage and Anne were in no want to be humiliated in front of her Aunt and Uncle.  
Her aunt popped her head in after a while,   
“Hello, Annie. Why are you in here sulking?”   
Anne fought back tears because she was not weak, ‘sulking - me?!’ she thought upset.   
“I… mother told me to stay put until she said so.”   
“Did she now? Well, everyone’s gone to the house. Come on, Anne – let us go inside. We have missed you endlessly since visiting you at Easter.” Aunt Anne smiled kind and reached her hand out and Anne clasped hers in it and jumped out of the carriage. Her aunt embraced her tightly, almost breaking down Anne’s resolve not to cry. Because there never was anyone quite so happy to see her as her aunt and uncle she felt. For once she mattered to someone and it didn’t feel as though they saw her as some oddity – a freak of nature as her mother usually called her. Aunt Anne let go of her slightly, standing back to have a look at her, hands on the sides of Anne’s face. And she laughed,   
“My, how tall you have grown since Easter, Annie! You are taller than me now. Stop growing!”   
Anne smiled,   
“I will try not to.”   
“What happened to your lip though, dear?” Aunt Anne frowned and ran her thumb over the bottom of Anne’s lip that were swollen from her mother’s hit. Anne took her Aunt’s hands gently and shrugged away,   
“Nothing.”   
Aunt Anne didn’t seem thoroughly convinced about that, but just then Rebecca came outside, and her mouth became a thin line when she saw Anne out on the courtyard.   
“I told you to stay in the carriage until I said so child.” She snorted, and Aunt Anne stood herself in front of Anne almost as if to protect her with her own body, she didn’t trust her sister-in-law.   
“As I said, she is a rascal and I simply don’t know what to do with her. She doesn’t listen to anyone. Was she bothering you?” Rebecca asked Aunt Anne who shook her head,   
“Not at all. Actually, Anne came out at my bidding. I didn’t know she was supposed to stay in there. She said as much, but I convinced her to come out.”   
“Oh – that child tries to manipulate everyone and everything in her way. I do not blame you.” Rebecca said to that and Anne could see the back of her aunt tense as though she was angry or upset. Anne panicked slightly, what if her aunt thought that was true?   
“Anne, good to see you again. Your uncle is inside – why don’t you pop in to say hi and I can have a few words with your mother?” Aunt Anne turned and gave Anne a look. Anne smiled gratefully at her aunt for keeping her mother busy whilst she ran inside.   
“Anne! I began to think you hadn’t come!” Her uncle grinned as he saw her and Anne went up to him,  
“Not coming to Shibden for the summer? I would rather die.”   
“Good to see you, and how you have grown! A tall lady, were has my little niece gone?” Uncle James teased and Anne rolled her eyes at him,   
“Mm, and they have decided to send me off to hell this autumn.”   
“Oh, I see. Whereto?”   
“York Manor school.” Anne sighed, and her uncle put a finger under her chin,   
“Chin up. We still have all summer – and on the bright side, if you’re off to school all autumn, you won’t be going home until Christmas and then you can come here immediately.”   
“No, school ends a week before we normally go here.” Anne said and her uncle lit up,   
“Really? Then, I will come get you and that’s a promise. I’ll talk to my brother, I’m sure he won’t disagree.”   
“So, I can come here a week early?” Anne said excitedly, and her uncle nodded,   
“Yes, so we can study something more useful to you. How are you coming along with the studies since Easter?”   
“Very well. I’ve been up at five every morning to study algebra, and then I’ve moved on over the subjects. Mother doesn’t know though. I hide my books under a loose floorboard.”   
“I see. You know Anne, if you are not too tired from the journey- you might come with me to catch some dragonflies. I collect various species. Study them. Not quite as interesting as dissecting frogs and such as we did at Easter, but they are beautiful creatures.” Uncle James looked down at her expectantly and Anne raised an eyebrow,   
“Who do you think I am? Tired? Tut, I am always up for dragonfly hunting.”   
“Good. Then that’s settled. After tea, we set off.”   
  
They sat down to take tea with the rest of the family, and Anne counted the seconds on the grandfather clock in the corner. She wanted to be out of there, or rather out of her mother’s sight. Every time she would open her mouth to say something clever, and well thought out, her mother would give her a sharp look and Anne would shut her mouth again.   
Samuel were encouraged to take part in the conversation but though he tried, his thoughts weren’t so eloquent. Not that it mattered of course. Anne knew her brother were good at many other things, and she and him could have much fun together when they were left to it. But for her to be excluded because of her sex or because of who she was when she was an intellectual and had many good things to say – that she couldn’t bear. Even John were allowed to partake more than she and he was just a ten-year-old ball of energy, who only talked about his wooden soldiers.  
Suddenly her uncle stood up, and everyone went quiet – looking at him,   
“Well, this has all been lovely, and I am pleased to see you all here again. But I will excuse myself and like to borrow Anne for a few hours.”   
Her father merely nodded, but her mother glanced at Samuel,  
“Shouldn’t you much rather take Sam with you? Anne is no good, she would surely ruin your plans.”   
“Ah, whereas Sam is a fine young man, I think for this Anne would do perfect.” Uncle James persisted and Captain Lister nodded,   
“Take her James if you want. Sam has promised me to practice his fencing with John.”   
“Thank you. Come on, Anne – no time to lose.”   
It was absolute heaven to be excused from her mother’s company and she took a breath of fresh air and sighed happily.   
  
“What happened to your lip?” Uncle James asked as they were on the outlook for dragonflies. “Eh, nothing.” Anne waved it off, and her uncle raised an eyebrow,   
“It just appeared?”   
“Mm.” Anne replied absentmindedly trying to focus on finding dragonflies for her uncle’s collection.   
“I see that I must revise biology and anatomy with you again.” Uncle James said then and Anne turned her head towards him,   
“What? Why? I mean I don’t mind studying that more, but I know well what you have already taught me.”   
“Well, then you know as well as I that bruises don’t appear without cause.”   
Anne had fallen into his trap, and she frowned at him,   
“It’s nothing. I… ran into a tree before we left.”   
“For the sake that you seem unwilling to tell me the real cause I will pretend to believe that Anne Lister ran face first into a tree.” Uncle James told her softly, and Anne turned her eyes from him, she did want to tell them- but what if they thought she was really bad? Or that she deserved it? What if they then would tell her parents what she had said? Might not the stays become more unbearable if they agreed with her punishments. That would mean that thrashing was not out of question at Shibden anymore.   
“Look, Annie!” Uncle James caught a dragonfly with his net, and Anne came closer to admire it. The blue colour seemed to glow in the sun.   
“What kind is this?” Anne asked, eying it closely,   
“I think it is a blue dasher, but we will have to have a closer look and open up my book on the subject when we come back.”   
Anne hummed in reply, determined now to find one of her own to give to her uncle’s collection.   
  
They continued hunting for dragonflies that whole summer whenever they had some time to it. Anne caught many for her uncle and they examined them closely in his study. Anne loved her uncle’s study, it was quiet, or well quieter and he had so many interesting books. Every morning at five she would sneak down and study with her uncle. He would lend her books and she would devour them. Any excuse they could find they would use so she could sneak off. Anne also taught Samuel to shoot straight that summer, something which her uncle had taught her summer’s previously. Her mother was unaware of course and her father just turned a blind eye as usual.   
  
On one of the last afternoons, Anne and her uncle were out once again to find more specimens of dragonflies, and it had been comfortably silent for a short while following a discussion of the central themes of the Greek drama of Oedipus which her uncle had let her read despite it not being suitable for ladies. ‘Pish posh’, her uncle had said after having said that and given her it. But her Uncle turned to her, slowing them down for a bit,   
“Anne, can I ask. Why has your mother thrown Samuel my way the entire summer? And why has he not been as energetic and playful as usual?”   
Anne’s heart sank a little and she reprimanded herself for it. But she had dreaded this, her uncle would ask her questions about her brother so he could leave Shibden to him or because he had figured out her mother’s mercenary plans and wanted nothing to do with them anymore.   
“Um,” Anne began trying to think of something to say that wouldn’t sound so bad, her uncle stopped in his tracks,   
“Just the truth if you please.”   
“Mother told him to behave and be helpful so that you might leave Shibden to him.”   
“She said that?” Her uncle scoffed and Anne nodded,   
“Yes. That’s why she has tried to throw Sam in your way all summer and why he has been so ‘calm’ and solemn.”   
“You know, I suspected it was something like that and whereas Samuel is a fine young lad, running an estate is hard business. It can be vicious sometimes. Economics is one part surely, but the other – to care, but also be firm is another. Samuel can’t… he is, forgive me, not suited and I don’t think he will ever grow into that role – I believe he would be crushed by it, and I wouldn’t want that.”   
“I understand. It would only be a burden for Sam. He is so, sensitive. I rather fear his destiny in the army. He would do much better elsewhere.” Anne said to that, trying to not put too much feeling into it. She didn’t want her uncle to see her disappointment. Because him not leaving Shibden to Samuel could only mean it were meant for a distant relative that had never heard of them – which ultimately meant that someday, Anne would not be allowed to return, and that stung.   
“You are very bright. I am at loathe that they should send you away to manor school. What good will you do there? Talents utterly wasted. I fear your destiny as just being some man’s wife more than Samuel’s in the army.” Uncle James revealed and Anne raised her eyebrows,   
“I am determined not to marry so you needn’t fret. I would rather starve and beg on my knees than marry some man.”   
“You say that now, dear, at fourteen but when love comes to bite you…” Uncle James laughed but Anne didn’t, she eyed him sharply,   
“No, I mean that. I could never be prevailed upon to marry. I would never want to be some man’s wife. Lower myself under someone? No thank you. Besides – I don’t like men.”  
“I agree, I cannot see you being some man’s wife. A bold spirit like yours. Don’t like men? I confess I can see that it’s hard to like people who would see women constricted and as a weaker sex. When in reality you and I both know that women are just as good – if not better… but does that statement apply to me, your brothers and father too?” Uncle James glanced at her and Anne’s ears became a little red,   
“Of course not. I meant other men, that might… anyway. I won’t.”   
“A sound thought, and I shall laugh, but only very kindly on your wedding day. Until then, travel the world – see the world.” Uncle James smiled, and Anne scoffed,   
“The only part of the world I will ever see is Yorkshire, and if I’m lucky Derbyshire.”   
“That’s a pessimistic tone from someone who adores geography, culture and history.” Uncle James smirked and Anne shook her head,   
“It’s a realistic view from a woman who has no prospects and no independent means.”   
“You know… let’s make ourselves a deal, shall we? – You go to school and do your best and when you have finished school – if you haven’t met the man of your dreams – let us go to Paris. My treat.” Uncle James said and Anne’s eyes grew wide,   
“Really? You would take me to Paris?”   
“Yes, and if I can’t, I’ll persuade my sister to take you.”  
“That’s about 1200 days away from now.”   
“You best start packing.” Uncle James winked and Anne laughed happily, her heart pounding hard in her chest – she might get to see Paris!   
“Thank you!” Anne hugged her Uncle tight and he patted her back,   
“No worries. It would be an absolute delight. Besides, I haven’t been for years and years.”   
  
Upon their returning home, Anne smiled at her uncle,   
“You know, dragonfly hunting might just have been my favourite thing this summer.”   
“Mine too.” Her uncle replied smiling, “Mine too.”   



	3. Bulky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Bulky 
> 
> Winter is coming... brace yourselves. Young Anne comes home for Christmas... =)

Autumn had turned to winter overnight this year. The snow lay thick outside having fallen constantly since mid-November. The fireplaces were burning most of the time, but the cold seemed unescapable. Anne and the other girls at school had to dress warm to be able to sit through their lessons without getting frost bites. They wore bulky clothing, but most seemed to freeze anyway. Anne didn’t mind the cold that much. She was mostly bored, and saw winter coming as a good sign. It meant she would soon be picked up and taken to Shibden. But now she was worried – it was the day before and the snow really lay deep – what if they couldn’t make it there? And she was stuck at school for Christmas. Anne shuddered at the thought. She longed to discuss science with her uncle. All though, Anne bit her lip to contain the smirk, she didn’t mind sharing a room with Eliza Raine. Anne glanced at said girl, she was sat next to her during the lesson and Anne couldn’t help it – Eliza must surely be the most beautiful woman on earth. She had never seen anyone quite so charming and wonderful; she was two years older than Anne. They shared the attic room, which was by far the coldest and dampest room at school. But they didn’t mind. They had begun sharing a bed to keep warmer. There was no fire keeping the room hot, it depended solely on warmth travelling from the rooms beneath them. Anne had asked her one evening, this was over a year ago now, if she might kiss her. Eliza had complied willingly, and they had kissed, only to kiss again and again. It was as if Anne finally understood herself, her repugnance against forming any sort of connection with a man. She loved and only loved the fairer sex. Eliza was the same. During the nights they talked of living together as soon as they finished school – as companions to the rest of the world, but they would know – that they were married before the eyes of God only. This talk of secretly marrying one another had Anne think she loved none so well as Eliza - Eliza who would give her soft, sweet kisses every night.   
It had begun like that – rather innocent but as time progressed, they had too. After all they were left to themselves in that room. They had explored each other’s bodies, and they had experienced what Anne liked to call their first ‘kisses’ with each other. Anne wasn’t entirely unexperienced; she had had her first… with another woman – an older woman when she was off with her father once.   
Anne wrote most of it in her journal – a gift from her aunt and uncle. She had begun journaling at fourteen and done it non-stop since then. She would write down absolutely everything. Even some of what she and Eliza did with each other – because she had made a code up. So, she wrote some in plain English and some with crypt hand – and Anne got braver with every day – scribbling down more details in her code.   
  
“It’s too cold.” Eliza mumbled to her, eyes still on their teacher and Anne smiled,   
“Do you want to borrow my coat?”   
“Don’t be silly, Anne – you’ll freeze!” Eliza turned her eyes to her for a brief second, careful not to alert anyone of their whispers.   
“Well, I am willing to.” Anne offered again, and Eliza bit her lip and shook her head,   
“But I won’t let you. Ah, this is all so bulky. I long for bed and warmth again.”   
Anne smirked, knowing full well what Eliza meant with that,   
“I could probably warm you up if you stay very still and quiet.”   
“Here?! Anne you are mental- and joking I hope.” Eliza said to that, her cheeks flushed, but she moved herself a little closer to Anne on the bench.  
“Maybe. Or I’ll have you wait, and that flush can warm you up sufficiently till then.”   
“You are such a tease, Lister.” Eliza managed to whisper, and Anne threw her a killer smile,   
“Happy too.”   
  
The next morning, they dressed again for the cold weather, and Anne had to agree – it was bulky, but at least she would see her uncle today – hopefully.   
“I shall miss you, Anne. I will think of you every so often.” Eliza told her before they left their room that morning, and Anne had smiled,  
“I will miss you too. But I’ll write!”   
Then they had shared a kiss and laughed as one of their teachers had opened the door a second after – no idea what had just transpired between the young ladies.   
“Miss Lister, your uncle is here to pick you up.”   
“Thank you, Ma’am. Have a nice Christmas.”   
“You too, and… God bless you.”   
  
Anne hurried downstairs pulling her colonial with her, almost knocking a few ladies down – how could they walk so painfully slow?   
“Anne!” Uncle James lit up in the hallway when he saw her and Anne ran the last bit and embraced him,

“Uncle! You came!”   
“Nothing could keep us from bringing you home over Christmas. But we should set off before it starts snowing again. Let me take your colonial.” Uncle James bent down to take her colonial, but Anne wouldn’t let him,  
“I can carry my own colonial.”   
“Of course, you can. Sorry.” Uncle James laughed, and Anne took it herself earning a few stares and raised eyebrows from the people around her. But her uncle didn’t mind. When they came outside, her uncle’s groom took it from her, and loaded it on the carriage and Anne went inside and sat down opposite of her uncle. He was dressed warm for the weather too, his coat strained around him from all the layers he wore.   
“Did you have a nice autumn?”   
“Yes, it was fine actually. I did write you letters every other week.” Anne smirked and he chuckled,   
“Yes, your aunt has been delighted with them. You are very kind to take time and write us ‘old folk’.”   
“Have you any news?” Anne asked then, and her Uncle arched his brow,   
“Hm, well, your father wrote us earlier this week – they shan’t come. The weather is too bad. Rebecca refused to travel.”   
“Oh? So, it’ll be just you and me and my aunt then?”   
“Yes, should I have told you? Would you rather have stayed at school then?”   
“Not at all. This might be the best Christmas ever.” Anne smiled.   
  
Shibden was by far better heated than the school had been, and Anne relished in being there, where she needn’t wear four hundred layers just to keep warm. It was even better when she had no chance of running into her mother and she could take time and sit with her aunt. Aunt Anne didn’t mind her niece reading whatever book she had laid her hands on whilst she worked on her embroidery – she would ask questions about it and relish in her niece’s company.   
On Christmas morning, Anne awoke in her room at Shibden and smiled to herself. She was so ridiculously happy whenever she was there. She wished she could wake up always at Shibden. Anne would dress and then sneak down to her uncle’s study to keep up with her studies and then when the house woke up, she ventured downstairs to eat a hearty Christmas breakfast with her aunt and uncle.   
“Happy Christmas.” Uncle James said suddenly and handed Anne a package over the table. She hadn’t thought she would get any gifts this year – since the stockings were not even hung up – and she knew her mother had said she wouldn’t receive anything because she hadn’t done too well in all her classes at school. ‘Embroidery’ Anne had thought bitterly.   
“For me?” Anne asked surprised, and both her uncle and aunt smiled,   
“Yes. I hope you’ll like it.” Uncle James said excitedly, and Anne took the package and opened it slowly. It was a box. Anne opened the box and inside of it were an exquisite pocket-watch in silver. Anne’s eyes grew wide and she had to look up at both her aunt and uncle,   
“Not for me surely?”   
“Of course, it is for you. You always want to know the time, and I thought this might help with that.” Uncle James smiled and her aunt nodded,   
“Also, this way – you can keep an exact track of time and that mother of yours cannot berate you for being late – not even by one second.”   
“This is too much! This is… thank you!” Anne stood up and rounded the table to give both her aunt and uncle a hug and a kiss on the cheek.   
“It’s inscribed.” Her aunt said excitedly, and Anne examined the watch closely,   
“Open it up.” Uncle James instructed, and Anne flicked it open and inside, though small were the inscription ‘To Anne Lister, Christmas day 1807, ‘Always ahead of her time’’. Anne’s heart tugged at that and she looked up through misty eyes,   
“I love it. Thank you so much! I shall always keep it with me.”   
It was more than just a simple gift; it was more than just a watch. Because it felt as though they really saw her for what she was, for who she was. They didn’t try to conform her to whatever society would like her to be. They encouraged her to be herself and to be proud of that. They saw her as an individual of her own mind and ways. Maybe they didn’t think her odd and misplaced. Maybe they even did love her.   
“No thank you, Anne for being here with us.” Uncle James retorted and Aunt Anne nodded,   
“You make us so happy just by being here. But maybe we should have given you another scarf to bulk up from the cold.”   
They shared a laughter at that, because really not one of them could wear any more clothing outside to hide from the freezing cold – it would surely be beyond ridiculous.   
  
Anne had been right before in thinking that this would be one of the best Christmases she had ever had. It truly was. **  
**


	4. Witch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Witch 
> 
> Anne's mother is a witch but I think I have already established that... 
> 
> Just a side-note: I have no idea if her mother was like this - I just based it on that deleted scene were Anne points out she's drunk as usual, and then the rest I based on Walburga Black (who really is the worst mother to walk the land of the living)  
> Another side-note: As I said it's all very over-dramatic and not meant to be historically accurate or canon etc. 
> 
> This is really not good... I would advice not to read it - but it is still part of the inktober thing which is why I kept it in, but I hate it - HAHA...

Sometimes when Anne was younger, she would daydream about being adopted. That she really was her Aunt’s child, but since she was unmarried, they had pretended she wasn’t. Now Anne knew her Aunt wouldn’t ever had acted in such a way, but it didn’t hinder her when she was younger from kneeling by her bedside every night, clasping her hands tightly together, shutting her eyes and fervently pray that it were true and that soon she would come get her. That she would open her eyes in the morning and find herself at Shibden – where she was allowed to be who she was. Nowadays, at sixteen, Anne didn’t have such silly thoughts. Only ever in secret – and only ever sometimes.   
  
She was home for Easter, which was in April this year, but after her birthday on the third. She had been up since five that morning to study in secret and she had just hidden her literature under a lose floorboard in her room after concluding her studies for the morning. If her mother knew she would surely get the beratement of the century as well as having to watch her mother burn her books before her very eyes. Anne eyed the floorboard, made sure it was secure enough, so no one suspected it.   
“Anne, you’re late for breakfast.”   
Marian opened her door and stood looking at her elder sister with hands on hips and Anne fought an urge to roll her eyes. Her sister was the most ridiculous thing – she loved her but, this behaviour of hers - acting like she was Anne’s superior, it just didn’t do it for Anne.   
“I’m aware, Marian, thank you.”   
“They have already cleaned it up.” Marian smiled at her with contempt written all over her face, and Anne shrugged her shoulder,   
“Why bother then? Hm? Why gloat? You know what mother does to me. Please do me the kindness of starting to use that brain of yours. It’ll do you no good to use our mother’s.”   
Marian’s smile vanished and she frowned, crossing her arms,   
“If you know all that – then why were you late?”   
“Well, sometimes, Marian, we have better things to do or simply other things that take up our time – you cannot always expect it to be your friend.” Anne sighed, she needed to get outside without Marian tagging along – her, Sam and John were going to fence down by the glade and if Marian found out she might let it slip. Anne didn’t blame her overly much – her sister was young, and she saw what her mother did to Anne. Surely all those annoying and terrible things she did were because she wanted to make sure she remained in their mother’s good graces – because she ultimately wanted love and affirmation.   
“What were you doing then?” Marian quirked an eyebrow, and Anne shook her head,   
“Nothing that concerns you.”   
“Who is Eliza Raine? You have written an awful lot of letters to her since coming home and you’ve only been home for a week.” Marian asked, and Anne clutched her fists, and her jaw tightened,   
“How would you feel if I interfered with YOUR personal life?!”   
“I’d hate it. That’s why I cleverly have no personal life.” Marian smirked and Anne pointed at the door,  
“Get out!”   
For once Marian heeded her and laughing closed the door behind her and Anne exhaled. Her heart was pounding quite hard in her chest. What if someone else noticed and thought it weird? Anne shook her head, no they wouldn’t because it was normal. Normal for young ladies to correspond with each other. No one would know by looking at them. Anne shook the lock on her chest drawer – it was still tight and secure. Anne breathed a sigh of relief. No one would need to know what was in there, nor what were in the journals she also kept in it.   
“Anne, you better explain yourself, young lady!”   
Her mother opened the door and Anne stumbled up from the floor again,   
“I haven’t done anything – I’ve been up here all morning!”   
“Not showing up at breakfast – poor manners are something I won’t stand for.”   
Anne fought back a roll of the eyes – her mother was often drunk and vulgar – poor manners made up her mother’s whole being.   
“I was busy.”   
“The only thing you should busy yourself with is being on time, perfecting your accomplishments and do well at school so we can land you with something resembling a respectable Gentleman of good fortune.” Her mother fumed and Anne bit her inner cheek to not do something rash.   
“Maybe I don’t want to marry!”   
“Well, you don’t have a choice. If someone asks, you will tell them yes and that is the beginning and end of it. We won’t have you for longer than necessary and no one else wants you! Look at yourself – a disgrace to the whole family. Now perhaps you will get some sense knocked into you. Turn around!”   
Her mother pointed at her with the cane she held in her hands and Anne complied – what else could she do? A part of her knew it were wrong, but this was so deep-rooted within her, and she thought there must be a reason for this, this hatred and these punishments. Anne took hold of the bedposts, and her mother caned her – she hadn’t dressed properly yet so the only thing between her bare back and the wood of the cane were her chemise. Anne hissed in pain as the lashes came raining over her back, she clutched tighter to the bedposts trying her hardest not to scream from the pain. She could feel her skin breaking and blood trickle down her back – it was in all humiliating. Tears stung her eyes, but she fought them back – she was not going to let her mother enjoy watching her cry and eventually the lashes subsided, and her mother stopped.   
“I hope you realise deep down that you deserve to be punished. That this is all for you to be better, so that maybe one day we might love you.” Her mother said, holding her by the chin, her nails all but digging into her skin and then just like that – she was gone again.   
  
Anne was left to her own, and with slow movements as to not upset the fresh bruises she called on Sarah to help her dress. She didn’t even frown when she went to clean the blood off her back – it happened all too often. And as it stung, Anne couldn’t help but think of her mother’s expression in the mirror as she thrashed her. Sometimes Anne thought she was a witch – someone who had the devil in them. For she couldn’t understand how a mother could beat her child and enjoy the pain that crossed over their face. Maybe it was normal – maybe Anne just didn’t get that.   
One time, Anne had hoped it were true; that her mother was a witch. It was at fourteen – she had been thrashed out in the barn. After which Anne had gone in saying she would do something about it, her mother had become furious at that and whacked her in the face with a book. The well-aimed hit with the book managed to break her nose and it were now a bit crooked – not symmetrical. It didn’t help her already bad looks Anne thought bitterly. But Anne comforted herself, as her mother had said many a time ‘you cannot further spoil an already ugly canvas’. Anne had wished and prayed her mother really were a witch at that point because that might’ve meant that someone would find out and take her away – only witch prosecution hadn’t been a thing for the past two hundred years.   
  
Anne hadn’t ever experienced any warmth or nearness from her mother– not as far as she could remember. The only time her mother ever did touch her was to beat her. Maybe her witch skin burnt when touching humans Anne mused and laughed at that thought – It was silly. But at that point two years ago, it had been the one thing that kept Anne sane through the beatings until school began or until they left for Shibden were her mother never so drastically hit her – wanting to keep up appearances.   
“Witch, witch, witch.” Anne muttered to herself, “She’s a fucking witch.”   



	5. Thunder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Thunder 
> 
> One of the few things Anne are really scared of turns out to be thunder, luckily Ann is there to help! ;)

Ever since Anne was a child; she had always hated thunderstorms. It was something about them that made her feel queasy and vulnerable. She had been out once in a thunderstorm when she was seven and taken refuge under a tree which had been struck by lightning and caught fire. Branches full of fire had begun raining down and had just but missed her. Anne had run home immediately afterwards and gotten away without any harm done to her. But that fear had stuck within her, and the mere sound filled her with anxiety – she was deadly afraid of thunder. It wasn’t reasonable or logical – she knew that, but that’s just the thing with phobias. They aren’t reasonable or logical.   
  
Anne had woken up in the middle of the night by lightning filling the room and now she was lying in bed, shaking with fear – feeling as though she couldn’t breathe. Beside her lay Ann peacefully asleep and she didn’t know if she wanted to wake her up because she hadn’t been sleeping well for the past weeks.   
A loud bang was heard outside, as rain rattled violently against the windows and lightning once more filled the room. The thunderstorm was right above them and Anne was petrified.   
“Ann.” Anne mumbled, her mouth dry, and the blonde mumbled in reply,   
“Mm?”   
“Will you hold my hand?” Anne asked, feeling ridiculous, but nevertheless knowing that it would make her feel a bit calmer through the anxiety she was currently experiencing.   
“Hold your hand? What?” Ann tried opening her eyes, completely delirious from just waking up, but another loud bang was heard, and she sat up, knowing her wife was deadly afraid of thunder and Ann draped her warm arms around Anne’s shoulders bringing her to rest against her chest.   
“Just breathe, Anne. Your safe in here.”   
“Do you think I’m pathetic?” Anne asked quietly, “I shouldn’t have woken you up.”   
“Oh shush! I don’t think you’re pathetic. I think you are adorable – and I am very flattered that you seek and find comfort in me.” Ann told her pressing a kiss against her brown hair, hugging her a little tighter to herself.   
“Oh Christ.” Anne clung tighter to Ann as the thunder made itself known again and Ann rocked her in her arms, stroking her with her hands,   
“You’ll be alright, Anne. I’m here – I will protect you from all around you.”   
“I don’t even know why I’m so scared of it. It’s ridiculous!” Anne mumbled into Ann’s side and she ran gentle fingers through her hair,  
“Fear isn’t always logical. Anxiety will make you doubt whatever firm belief you have.”   
Anne pressed herself closer to Ann, nuzzling her face into the nape of her neck. Ann continued running her fingers through her hair, and the other hand ran over her back. She could feel a wetness on her neck and wondered how fears began, she didn’t think Anne pathetic, but she did wonder how it came about – how her rock and light could be so frightened of things one could easily explain with science. The brain really was an interesting thing and she understood the brunette’s fascination with it.   
“Couldn’t it be over now?” Anne mumbled shakily into Ann’s neck, as another thunderous sound was heard and Ann thought for a second before removing Anne from under her neck, the brunette seemed surprised, but Ann helped her on her back instead.   
“Ann?”   
“Lie still.” Ann told her with a smirk, and Anne were just about to protest again when Ann gave her a serious look and she shut her mouth.   
“What are we…” Anne began but just then lightning filled the room, but her voice died out because Ann’s lips had crashed onto hers. The kiss lingered for a little longer than the lightning bolt before Ann pulled away.   
“What are you doing?” Anne asked, a quirked eyebrow and Ann grinned as she sat herself astride Anne,   
“You’ll see.”   
“I don-“ Anne hadn’t time to finish her sentence as thunder was heard but just then Ann’s lips were on hers again, teasing her with her tongue, Anne growled as she tried to get loose to react on the thunder but it had already gone by the time Ann ended their kiss.   
“Ann!”   
“Anne?” Ann were clearly so pleased with herself, and Anne couldn’t even figure out why. Suddenly lightning filled the room and Anne opened her mouth to let out a yelp, but it never came – instead she felt soft lips upon hers again – they didn’t cease when lightning and thunder followed each other by the second for almost five minutes. Ann was a very good kisser, and it was hard to concentrate on being afraid when her soft mouth was on hers, her tongue teasing her bottom lip. The kiss ended as the thunder ceased. This repeated itself throughout the hour and by the end of it, Anne was hardly aware of the thunder at all, she was busy kissing her wife sore. When the thunder did cease, they were out of breath – had swollen lips and were excited at that too. They lay beside each other panting and then glanced at the other and began laughing,   
“What was that?” Anne asked grinning and Ann stroke her fingers with her thumb and then leant down to kiss them, looking up at the brunette with a smirk,   
“A treatment.”   
“Treatment? Why Miss Walker for what?” Anne asked amused, and Ann chewed her bottom lip clearly pleased.   
“I thought that if I kissed you every time lightning or thunder came; I could condition you to not be scared of the thunder and instead expect a kiss.”   
“What?! Ann! That’s… that’s actually brilliant… By God Ann that’s, and you haven’t even read psychology. This is – this is so clever. I, I don’t think that’s even thought of… Ann you’re a genius!” Anne looked at her astonished and the blonde flushed under her stare and praise,   
“Did it work then?”   
“Well – yes! I suppose it did. I guess we won’t know for sure until next time. Good Lord, Ann – I think I fell a little bit more in love with you just now!” Anne told her and leant forwards to kiss her softly, Ann laughed,   
“I love you too!”   
“After tonight I think I am rather in want of more thunder.” Anne winked and then they laughed merrily before venturing off to Italy.   



	6. Spider

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Spider
> 
> I stole so much from incorrectgentlemanjackquotes... hehe had to, saw the prompt and knew just what quote to use =)

Anne was staring into the dark pools of the creature before her. Her whole body had gone rigid, she couldn’t move – what if it leapt at her? A shudder ran along her spine but still she couldn’t move. A yell was stuck in her throat, it was completely silent. So, this was how it all were to end, Anne Lister defeated at last - killed by a vicious creature that had crept inside her home unseen. The creature moved unexpectantly and the legs tapped on the floor as its many legs were in movement. Anne couldn’t take her eyes of it, she was sweating, she was to be honest - terrified. The creature wanted her dead – there was no doubting it. It made to move towards her and as it neared her; Anne finally sprang into action, she ran out of the room, slamming the door in the face of her enemy but she didn’t throw a look over her shoulder to make sure it was properly closed instead she ran down the stairs or more like leapt down them – taking four-five steps at a time. Out of breath from her sheer panic as she ran into her sister at the bottom of the stairs,   
“You must never open the door to the small library upstairs again!” Anne panted, and Marian raised an eyebrow,   
“And why ever not?”   
“Because I said so.” Anne barked, she was not about to tell her sister of the murderous creature that were inside – Marian would surely then go upstairs and open the door to see if it were true and manage to release the beast from its prison.   
“Have anyone ever told you that you’re a quite the oddity?” Marian asked and Anne glared at her,   
“You think you can hurt me with that?! Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me!”   
“Throw a dictionary in her face!” Aunt Anne cried from the sitting room, Anne rolled her eyes,   
“Ha ha, very funny.”   
“Actually, I might do it.”   
“Break my nose again – like mother did?” Anne raised an eyebrow and Marian became a little green,   
“Urgh, don’t talk about that, it was awful!”   
“Feeling guilty because you ratted me out all those times?” Anne asked, hands on hips,   
“I didn’t realise… I wan-… It was stupid, Anne – and I’m truly sorry - I have told you.” Marian looked sorry enough but Anne was much more occupied with the thought of the vicious creature upstairs.   
“Mm, right… good. Um, anyway – don’t open that door.” Anne told Marian and her sister raised her eyebrows at her, staring at her,   
“I won’t give an explanation, Marian – it’s my estate – just do as I say. For once.”   
“Yes, you never tire of pointing that out.”   
“This obsession, Marian you have of the whole thing- is unhealthy.”   
“Girls, stop fighting.” Aunt Anne stumbled up to them, and Anne took hold of her arm to steady her.   
“We weren’t.”   
“You are good at many things Anne but lying to me – try harder.”   
“I don’t want to lie to you. Never could - never will.” Anne smiled and her aunt patted her hand softly,   
“Will you help me upstairs, to bed dear?”   
“Of course, Aunt.” Anne replied and then proceeded to help her aunt with that.  
  
When Anne had tucked her aunt in, she bent down to place an affectionate kiss on her forehead,   
“Good night, Aunt. “

Aunt Anne took hold of her arm,  
“Anne.”   
“Yes?” Anne turned her head back and sat down on the side of the bed.  
“Do you remember when you first came to us? To live with us I mean.”   
“How could I forget?”   
“Is it hard, I mean do you find me a mere shell of who I used to be? Do you wish it had been me and not your uncle who had gone first?” Aunt Anne asked her, clearly with some apprehension, and Anne shook her head slowly, tears burning behind her eyes – she was terrified of losing her aunt.   
“It’s challenging to see the pain you’re in, Aunt. But you are still you. You, taking me in under your wings like that – I was difficult – am difficult and you loved me despite all my flaws. You loved me when no one else would, you and my uncle. Me being away – travelling, has nothing to do with you and everything to do with my own disappointments that I wish not to link to Shibden because Shibden… it’s my happy place – it’s my home. You made it my home from the start – I never felt at home in Market Weighton. And I am appalled that you should think that I see you as some sort of nuisance, Aunt. I love you – and through it all, you and my uncle, bless his soul, you were both my heroes. If I am even a fraction of what you were and are to me – I shall be very well pleased. I did not wish for you to die before Uncle James, I clung to the hope that you would both die at the very ripe age of a hundred and ten.”   
Tears were running down both women’s cheeks and aunt Anne kissed her nieces’ hand, as a mother does her child.   
“I’m sorry, it’s just – old age makes you sentimental, makes you wonder.”   
“It’s alright, aunt. I’m happy to bring you comfort and tell you that I love you.” Anne smiled and her aunt squeezed her hand,   
“And for the record, me and your uncle didn’t love you despite all your flaws – we loved you because of them and because of who you are!”   
Anne’s heart tugged in her chest at that, and tears ran rapidly over her cheeks, the monster quite forgotten for now.   
“Do you know just how many times I dreamt that you were my real mother? And I often saw Uncle James as more of a father figure than father. Hm, despite you being, you know sister and brother? I used to pray it were so, that God would take me back to you.”   
“He did. He brought you to us and we loved you, had loved you from the very start – from the first time we saw you, as our very own.”   
Anne embraced her Aunt, and they kissed each other’s cheeks and laughed. Anne glanced at her Aunt, about to confide something in her,   
“Do you know, I still find myself looking for him in his study. Every time I’m in there, it feels as though, at any moment, my uncle will come inside to sit with me. I cannot believe it has already been six years since he passed.”   
“I still find myself looking for him at times. Thinking ‘Oh I must tell James that’ and so on, I don’t think I will ever stop. Time doesn’t always mend the wounds – but you can live with them, if you cherish the memories.” Aunt Anne revealed and Anne smiled sadly, it was truly heart-breaking.   
“He was a great man, he taught me everything he could, and he gave me all the opportunities I wanted that were his to give. He took me to Paris…”   
“He loved you as his own – he wanted you to feel loved. The only time I ever saw my brother cry was the times when he thought they abused you – and the night you came to us – after I told him of all the scars on your back – he vowed to never let you back there again. He loved you very much. He was always excited when you came to stay. And when you came to live with us permanently, he re-wrote his will the following days.” Aunt Anne told her, and Anne was stunned to hear that – she had always thought that was something he had done at a much later date – when her brothers had passed, and he knew her father wouldn’t be able to run the estate by himself.   
“Did he? I always thought he did that as a last resort- since he must have known I would never…”   
“No, he did it just then. He didn’t care about that. Actually, I think he was rather relieved and pleased that he could be sure the estate wouldn’t fall to some random man he had no connection with. He was always proud of you for going your own way– do you remember when he came home with his knuckles bruised?”  
“He did know, I just didn’t think he really accepted that. Yes, I remember – they were almost black. He said he had had an accident.”  
“Well, he was down the pub at Mytholm and there was Mr. Rawson and Mr. Robertson – the elder both of them and they made a lude comment about you. They insulted you to your uncle. Apparently, they were drunk beyond measure. He was of a mind to ignore them but then they had said something about you being ‘Queer’ and… uh anyway he lost it and proceeded to beat the devil out of them… literally. You should have seen the state of them – black, blue and purple – they couldn’t show themselves out for weeks. Their noses were never the same I think.”   
“He beat them up to defend my honour?” Anne wondered; the tiniest bit amused at the image of the two men after her uncle had beaten some sense into them.   
“Hm. Your uncle was a good man, a wise man – I think he would have happily approved of your… of Ann as your possible companion. She is just the right sort of person for you.” Aunt Anne told her, rubbing the tears away on her niece’s cheeks. Anne exhaled, and leant into the palm of her aunt’s hand,   
“I think I might have been blessed with two of the greatest humans in the world. Thank you, Aunt!”   
“Yes, yes - now off to bed you pop!”   
“I’m not five.” Anne smiled, and her aunt gave her a sharp look,   
“Fine, goodnight.” Anne kissed her aunt’s cheek again before standing up and leaving her room. Anne went inside her own room to ready for bed when she saw it – a companion to the vicious creature she had shut in. Her scream caught in her throat and she backed out of her own room, sweat forming on her back, and around her neck. She closed the door shuddering before running down the stairs.   
“I’m off.” Anne told Mrs. Cordingley who were just about to lock up the house,   
“Ma’am?”   
Anne didn’t answer her but exited the house and with large strides ran off into the dark. It felt as though something was walking across her body and she ran faster – it was after her – she was certain – she daren’t stop anyway.  
  
Soon enough she saw light and realised she had run all the way to Crow Nest. Anne thought for a second but decided that she’d rather be impolite than give herself to the hands of the creature. She knocked on the door, and James opened,   
“Good morn… um, night, James – is Miss Walker up?”   
“Yes, ma’am she’s in the…”  
“James, who is it?” Ann’s voice called and then suddenly she was in the doorframe and Anne threw her a white nervous smile,   
“Anne!?” She cried stunned, and James were dismissed so they were alone,   
“Um, this is a bit awkward, but you wouldn’t want to have some tea and then perhaps I could stay all night?” Anne breathed heavily from her run and Ann looked completely astonished but then she smiled at the brunette’s dishevelled appearance and she could barely contain a laugh as she quirked an eyebrow at her,   
“Is there a spider in your room, again?”   
“They have like three hundred legs, I have two! How am I supposed to survive!!?” Anne cried exasperated and Ann burst out laughing, bending in half – tears running down her cheeks, Anne was not amused.  
“You are hilarious!” Ann laughed but pulled the brunette with her inside,   
“I’m glad you find my mortal peril a hoot.”   
“Oh yes I do! Come on in, I’ll ask for fresh tea.”  
  
The morning after Anne and Ann walked to Shibden, they were really headed out for a walk to the chaumiére, but Anne needed to collect something at home first. When they came inside Aunt Anne greeted them in the hallway,   
“Anne! Marian wants to speak to you in her study.”   
“Marian, doesn’t have a study.”   
“Eh, you recall that room you closed off yesterday because of the ‘vicious creature’ in it?”   
“She opened hell’s gate!?” Anne cried and both Aunt Anne and Ann laughed at her.   
  
“Why are you so overdramatic?” Marian told her after she had been yelled at for ten minutes about how they could’ve all died because she had opened the room with the spider in it.   
“Because I have deep-seated emotional issues from our mother and then Mariana being a jerk at such a young age and now, I cover it up by acting more flamboyant and overdramatic, so I don’t have to deal with my emotional issues and repressed trust and abandonment issues.” Anne ranted and Marian raised a confused eyebrow as she had heard almost nothing of that fast rant,   
“What?”   
“What.” Anne threw back.


	7. Fancy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Fancy
> 
> Anne feeling fancy two times in her life... 
> 
> (Imagine how bad I am at drawing if I thought this turned out better, HAHA)

Twice in her life Anne had felt truly fancy. The first time was when she was eighteen and had been allowed to finish the last part of her education at York Manor school after Eliza Raine had left and her uncle had wanted her to acquire new clothing for their trip to Paris. And because quite frankly she had grown tall and were in desperate need of a new wardrobe. Anne had told them that she wanted something less decorative and more practical. Her uncle hadn’t scrunched his nose at that, instead he had stood her cause at the seamstress and waistcoats had been sown for his niece as well as shirts, and cravats. She loved the little pocket on her waistcoat, it made for a natural place for her pocket-watch that they had gifted her for Christmas a few years prior.  
Her aunt never minded her appearance, knew she could say nothing that would sway her niece in any case, and they proudly walked with her from the seamstress.   
The day of their travel, Uncle James had surprised her with a black box and Anne had raised an eyebrow at that. But they had urged her to open it. Inside were black tissue paper and when she removed it, she saw the top of a hat. Anne had looked at them and picked the black hat up,  
“I thought a lady might need a hat to go with her outfit.” Uncle James had told her excitedly and Anne had laughed in disbelief – had her uncle really bought her a top hat? Anne had put it on – feeling five feet taller, and her back straightened automatically and she felt proud. She had never felt more comfortable, it was a look. It really was – everywhere she went people would stare – whisper of her being a man and her uncle would look at her with a twinkle in his eyes and they would laugh at it. She was fancy – she was dapper, and she owned that look. No matter how warm it was – the hat stayed on, it was part of her image.   
  
The second time Anne had felt really fancy was when she wore navy for the first time in seventeen years. She was almost forty-three and for this occasion she would wear colour – navy because it went well with gold and also it worked fine with black and she wanted to wear that old top hat that had collected dust for the past twenty years. She wanted that to be part of her whole outfit. It meant so much to her – that old thing that her uncle had gifted her. Anne had eyed herself in the mirror with a satisfactory smile. She looked well indeed. The waistcoat was white with a blue floral pattern all over it, and her navy coat was cut to perfection. The top hat did the whole thing justice – it topped it off literally. But together with Ann’s crème white and gold dress they had looked fancier than any of the other couples at church that morning in York.   
  
They had arrived at Shibden from York at midday, and Anne expected a beratement from Marian – she hadn’t told her where she was headed, and they’d been gone for a couple of days.   
As Anne handed Ann out of the carriage, wearing their secret smiles – only they knew what they had just done, Anne stroke the wedding band on Ann’s finger softly and was about to kiss it when Marian came outside the house, hands on hips as always.   
“And where on earth did you run off to? You better have a good explanation for this!”  
“We have three.” Anne smirked,   
“Pick one.” Ann said as laughter bubbled up and Marian rolled her eyes at them.   
“Aunt have been…” Marian began but Anne interrupted her,   
“I told her where I was headed.”   
“You did?! But she…”   
Anne ignored Marian and took Ann’s hand in hers and led her into the house and to the sitting room where her Aunt was, her father was no were to be seen.   
“Aunt, we’re back.” Anne went up to the woman and she grinned up at them,  
“Oh, my! You are both looking rather dashing this morning. How was Easter service?”   
“I think this might just have been the best one so far!” Anne said sharing a mischievous look with her new wife, and Ann’s eyes sparkled up at her shining with mirth, and Aunt Anne seemed pleased.   
“Oh, it was excellent.” Ann agreed, without taking her eyes of the brunette.   
Aunt Anne took hold of one of their hands each and eyed the new rings they wore, and she raised an eyebrow at Anne before laughing at her – shaking her head almost in disbelief – her niece had just done the impossible,   
“Congratulations.”   
“On what?”   
Marian was stood in the doorway and all Ann(e)’s looked back at her and they shared a look before Aunt Anne glanced at her other niece,   
“Well Marian, wouldn’t you congratulate them at matching each other so exquisitely? Gold and navy – beautiful.”   
“Yes… very fancy. Why are you suddenly wearing colour though?” Marian mumbled suspiciously, feeling as though there was something, they weren’t telling her.   
“Well, I had an epiphany – apparently there are other colours than black.” Anne shrugged her shoulder, but Marian didn’t look convinced,   
“Right…”   
“Oh, and before I forget - Ann is moving in today.”  
Anne threw over her shoulder as they were on their way out again to fetch Ann’s things.  
“What?” Marian cried shocked and turned around to face her aunt,  
“Did you know that?”   
“Um, yes. Did I forget to tell you?” Aunt Anne pondered and Marian huffed irked,   
“Why doesn’t anyone ever tell me anything!”   
“Anything.” Anne called from the hallway and Marian groaned out loud – her sister was truly the most annoying specimen to be found.   



	8. Rock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Rock
> 
> Anne reads Pride and Prejudice and finds her favourite quote...

“What are men compared to rocks and mountains?” Anne read out loud and shut the book with a thud. Her aunt glanced up at her twenty-year-old niece, dropping her embroidery for a second, raising an eyebrow,   
“Hm?”   
“That’s the sanest thing I’ve read in this work so far.”   
Anne held up the book with the title ‘Pride and Prejudice’ and her aunt shook her head kindly at her niece, continuing with her embroidery,  
“Is that so? What’s it about? Who wrote it?”   
“It doesn’t say who by – it’s by ‘a lady’ which normally means its written by a man but in this instance, it’s definitely written by a woman. The sarcasm that underlines everything and especially that of the things concerning females– is too much on point to be written by any man.”   
“How can you be so sure?” Aunt Anne asked intrigued and Anne smiled,   
“Well, for starters, the ladies are intelligent – outwits the men and the whole text is too pro-women to be by a man. The odd John and Dave does not view women as such as they think to poorly of us - they all like to think that women are idiots.”   
“What’s the storyline then?”   
“It’s about Elizabeth Bennet – an intelligent young female of twenty who says she will not marry for anything other than love. She has four sisters and though a gentleman’s daughter – they haven’t handled economics well and the estate is entailed to an odious cousin.  
The cousin offers for her and she declines because he is ridiculous. Oh, and then there’s Mr. Darcy too, a rich gentleman of substantial means - £10.000 a year at least. He is arrogant and proud. He snubs her and she hates him. He starts to like her when he realises, she is intelligent et cetera and overcomes his prejudices and faults because he was rejected by her after a poor proposal. She’s in the lake district now with her uncle and aunt. Her mother is horrible, and her father is unbothered…” Anne explained with a shrug, the novel was well-written, and whereas Anne could relate to some of it – she couldn’t understand another aspect of it or rather not relate to it.   
“Sounds like a novel I might enjoy!” Aunt Anne chuckled and Anne nodded,   
“You might have it when I’m done with it. I’m determined to see how it ends, if only because it’s hilarious with all its sarcasm and its caricatures.”  
“Sarcasm– why what have you done now, Anne?”   
Uncle James appeared in the room and Anne smirked,   
“You heard those that word and immediately thought I had done something?”   
“Aren’t sarcasm usually associated with you?” Uncle James raised an eyebrow and Anne rolled her eyes,  
“I refuse to answer that.”   
“Anne’s reading a new book written by a lady, she was just telling me that it said: ‘What are men compared to rocks and mountains?’.” Aunt Anne told Uncle James as went to sit down beside his sister, eying Anne with eyes full of mirth,   
“Really? Is that your new life motto then, Anne?”   
“It will be when I finally get the chance to climb Monte blanc.”   
“Must you do such things?” Aunt Anne groaned nervous, she hated when her niece put herself in unnecessary danger.   
“I’m always alright.” Anne replied with a reassuring smile, but her aunt wasn’t convinced.   
“Let her be! She’ll do fine.” Uncle James comforted her, but Aunt Anne didn’t look much calmed,   
“You say that now but what if something did happen – and she- you ended up in a coffin!”   
Anne frowned at her aunt, but smiled then,   
“Then you will say at my funeral ‘What are rocks and mountains compared to men? – Dead, just as our dear Anne – stone dead’.”   
Uncle James laughed with his niece, but Aunt Anne looked horrified to which Anne had to stride over and sit down on her other side and take her hand in hers,   
“I am only joking, aunt. I wouldn’t deliberately do anything stupid. But we are not alive, are we? - If we’re not taking the odd risk every now and again.”   
“Don’t you dare face the final curtain until I have done so.” Aunt Anne scolded her, and Anne kissed her cheek,  
“I’ll make sure not to!”   
“Let us encourage her to settle down and we shan’t have to worry about it no more.” Uncle James told her aunt and Anne smiled, she would love it to be settled at Shibden someday.  
“Did you hear your uncle, Anne? Find yourself a companion and settle down for the sake of peace and my nerves.” Aunt Anne told her, and Anne laughed,   
“I’ll do my best.”   
“Someone who deserves you.” Uncle James said standing up,   
“Someone who makes a mountain a poor adventure in comparison.”   
Anne nodded seriously, but then she added with a smirk,  
“What are men compared to rocks and mountains?”   
“Lord give us strength.” Aunt Anne murmured to that, thinking to herself that it might be another while until her niece did settle down – if ever. **  
**


	9. Throw

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Throw
> 
> Anne and Mariana fights...

“Throw me away then.”

Anne opened her arms, her stance proud but there were tears threatening to spill from her dark eyes. Too much had happened these last few months for her to let it pass, though she knew this quarrel wouldn’t end well for any of them.   
“Freddie – that’s not what I…” Mariana began, reaching out to touch her but Anne moved away, tired of having the same argument with her, time and time again. They weren’t good for each other.   
“But it’s what you implied, isn’t it? What am I? Some common freak, that entertains you whenever you’re bored of your ridiculous existence?! – If your irritable husband permits it.”   
Mariana rolled her eyes at her, clearly not wanting to have the conversation at all as it were inconvenient to her – she wanted to make the most of the time with Anne before she needed to return with Charles.   
“Freddie…” She reached out again, but Anne slapped her hand away,   
“Don’t call me that.”   
“But that’s what I’ve always called you!” Mariana put on a seductive smile that made Anne’s stomach churn – Steph was right, too much water had passed underneath their bridge. How had she ever found Mariana attractive? – She was manipulative, and selfish – she was mean and too insipid for her. How could someone be called anything else when they daren’t live true to themselves, when they just sat down and let society rule them.   
“And that ends now. Christ, I do not know why I- I don’t like you calling me that, Mary!” Anne growled and Mariana’s mouth turned sour, and she crossed her arms – glaring at Anne,   
“You didn’t mind for the past twenty years – actually you didn’t mind me until your little Miss Walker made entrance in your life.”   
“I did mind. For twenty years I have minded, Mary! You ridicule me all the time. You call me things. You talk about loving me, but you couldn’t even bare being seen with me! Still barely do and, AND by God Mary you married Charles – you refused me! You cannot have the cake and eat it too. You never loved me, did you? – You used me – continue to use me for your own pleasure. You tore me down!” Anne shouted, clenching her fists, doing her utmost not to hit the woman in-front of her. She might be angry, but she wasn’t going to throw away twenty years of friendship – because she still cared for her even if it were only as friends nowadays.   
“I speak the truth, Fred. You looked like a man and that was humiliating – you were so… it was ridiculous! People snubbed me because of you! You would do the oddest things – you walked miles to see me – and it was embarrassing. People talk!”   
“Mm, and that’s your opinion of me. Thank you for clearing that up so thoroughly. Now if you don’t mind – don’t write to me again when you’re feeling the lust creeping on – I won’t satisfy you. Why would I? – Fucking you feels cheap, and I am too old for that. Besides I’m done giving for your pleasure alone.” Anne scowled at Mariana who looked at her with a mix of anger and aloofness.   
“You wouldn’t let me!”   
“Did you really think I would after you laughed at me? After you ridiculed my body. After you had given me that – I had to go to Paris to rid myself of that – thank you very much. Leave it be, Mary – it’s over. This is over. We’ll be friends and nothing more, understood?!” Anne barked at Mariana towering over her and she stumbled back but didn’t avert her eyes.   
“Don’t be ridiculous Anne, you always come back for me! No one else will have you. Not even your funny little friend. Tell you what when they lock her up…”   
Mariana wasn’t allowed to finish that sentence, because she was being forced up the bookshelf with Anne’s hands pushing her chest,  
“Shut up! If you ever talk about Ann that way again, I will... will throw you away, snub you in polite society and your name will never cross my lips again!” Anne warned her, gritting her teeth and Mariana looked quite petrified for once – as if she was finally taking Anne on her words.   
“She’s a lunatic.” Mariana spat, and Anne almost slapped her hard across the face,   
“Shut your filthy mouth, Mary! You don’t know her! She is so kind, so good natured and she, unlike you loves me for who I am – just as I am – she’s not embarrassed by me.”   
“You couldn’t love a woman like her. She’s not clever enough.” Mariana panted, still being pushed up the bookshelf,  
“You don’t know her, she’s clever and unlike you she isn’t a bitch and unlike you she’s brave!” Anne growled, pushing harder on Mariana who whimpered only slightly before throwing her a wicked smile,   
“You’re just desperate for love so you’ll settle for anything. You don’t love her. Poor girl really. Mad and played around by you. She’s too young for you and you’re using her.”   
“How dare you!? You know nothing about me, absolutely nothing! I thought you did but you don’t. Ann is not... She unlike you have had real trauma happen to her – she has a reason to be that way sometimes – you don’t. She’s brilliant and I love her! I haven’t loved anyone like I’ve done her. I warn you, Mary - If you say another thing about her, I won’t be responsible for my actions.” Anne yelled into Mariana’s face and the woman seemed to finally resolve but then she threw a cocky smile,   
“Do you love her or do you just like the feel of her? The feel of her innocence as she writhes under you. Has she got a tight…”   
Anne hit Mariana across the face with more force than she meant to, to stop her from ending that vulgar sentence but her lip begun bleeding, and Anne released her and took her hat quickly from the chair, needing an escape afraid that she might do more things she’d come to regret afterwards when her temper calmed.   
“Where are you going Freddie?” Mariana asked her still standing against the bookshelf,   
“Away from you. Goodbye.”   
“She doesn’t want you – she’s in Scotland away from you!” Mariana screeched after her, but Anne didn’t turn around again, she left, and tears ran down her cheeks as she thought of Ann and the fact that she had thrown her away, given them up – or maybe she had. She had let herself be thrown with ease and she would let herself be thrown off to Paris, to Copenhagen or to Rome. She was thrown. Always was. Her mother had thrown her away first and it just kept happening – it kept repeating itself. It was a constant sadness, a sorrow – a blackness around her and she wondered when it would end - when the skies would clear up and the sun would shine again. **  
**


	10. Disgusting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Disgusting
> 
> Anne comes home really drunk...

“You smell disgusting.” Ann murmured, but Anne neverminded that, and kissed her roughly again whilst the blonde tiredly tried to squirm away from her. Anne ran a hand up her thigh, and Ann groaned, and fumbled after her hand to stop it from going any further up,   
“Anne. Not now, I’m sleeping!”   
Anne kissed her again, biting her lip and the blonde scrunched her nose, she really did reek and Ann put her hand against Anne’s face trying to force her from her.   
“I want you – I need you! You promised to love and cherish me!” Anne whined against her neck and Ann who tried to push the brunette away stopped but her hands remained at Anne’s shoulders,   
“How much did you drink? It’s not like you to become intoxicated.”   
“A mouthful.” The brunette smirked and lost her balance and crashed onto Ann who moaned from losing all the air in her lungs,   
“Anne - Get off!”   
“One kiss?” Anne pouted and kissed her before Ann had time to reject her,   
“Your breath smells awful, Anne – it’s really disgusting.” Ann growled and Anne frowned at her, supporting her body on her elbows, still lying atop Ann, pondering this.   
“Oh, I know!” Anne grinned and pushed herself off Ann’s chest making her stonker from the pressure. Ann scowled at her back, Lord knows there will be a quarrel in the morning – and Ann was going to win – Ann reckoned Anne wouldn’t even get a say in their spat, she would probably be busy hurling her guts out.   
Ann furrowed her eyebrows, sitting up better in bed to see what Anne was up to. She had crawled on her knees to the edge of the bed and now raised the lavender soap by the wash basin and before Ann had time to stop her, she put it in her mouth. Ann grimaced.   
“Anne for crying out loud! Don’t eat the soap. Give it to me – let go! Anne its’ not good for you! Spit it out – NO DON’T SWALLOW - ANNE!!! Ah well that’s just disgusting!”  
Ann put her fingers inside Anne’s mouth and rolled her eyes as the brunette wiggled her eyebrows at her. Ann took the soap left in her mouth and pulled it out and looked at the wet, chewed soap with mild disgust.   
“Anne… excuse my French but what the fuck did have?”   
“Vodka – Russian, revolting drink – remarkably disgusting.” Anne grinned and placed her head on Ann’s shoulder, Ann sighed,   
“Oh Lord, give me strength.”   
“Will you fuck me?” Anne asked and Ann patted her over the head lazily,   
“Not today – I’m tired.”  
“But… I’m so… I need you to… I’m all ready for you – you excite me.”   
Whereas Ann would normally find that a rather pleasing thought – knowing that she had such a power over the woman, that she loved her and wanted her, having a wasted woman tell you that after you forced soap out of her mouth – wasn’t perhaps ideal.   
“Anne, I would happily comply if you weren’t drunk… Actually, I’d do it if you weren’t drunk beyond measure – I don’t want to be gagged on.”   
“But I smell like lavender!”   
Anne’s eyes turned misty and Ann groaned, not the tears, not the tears - too late – Anne was already weeping.   
“Why don’t you want to fuck me?”   
“I want to… Anne, stop! You will regret it in the morning.” Ann told her stroking her back,   
“You don’t love me anymore! I’m disgusting.” Anne said before snivelling all over Ann’s shoulder and the blonde raised an eyebrow – yes, she was of a mind to agree – her wife was a little disgusting at the moment.   
“Anne, I do love you. More than you give me credit for right now. But you’re drunk, you just ate soap and I’m not taking advantage of you in this state. Let’s just lie down, I can give you a rub –don’t – I meant on the back. But you need to calm down and sleep and maybe have a glass of water.” Ann placed a soft kiss against Anne’s forehead, this was not the finest hour in her life, in any of theirs. Anne stood up hastily,   
“I’m fine- I’m not drunk, I am perfectly---” Anne threw up violently in the wash basin and Ann though revolted stood up and held the loose strays of hair away, rubbing her back until she had finished retching.   
“I don’t feel good.” Anne whimpered as Ann rubbed her lower back and held her to steady her.   
“Alright, let us pop this down.” Ann hid the wash basin under the bed placing a towel over to hinder it from smelling. Then she turned to the other woman and led her back to bed.   
“Sit down for me, Anne.”   
“Will you give me a special kiss?” Anne simpered and Ann rolled her eyes at her,   
“Stop being such a creep, it doesn’t suit you, dearest.”   
Ann tied her shoes off and ran her fingers up to pull off Anne’s stockings and it was hard not to sigh as the brunette made an ‘ahhh’ noise at that.   
“Higher up.”   
“Your socks end here.” Ann told her before standing up and giving the woman a chaste kiss, and Ann licked her lips, grimacing – urgh lavender and vomit.  
“Kiss me again.” Anne begged, grabbing her by the thigh, raising her lips to hers and Ann shook her head,   
“Let’s get you undressed first.”  
“So we can… fuck.” Anne wondered excited, smiling wide and Ann glowered at her,

“Oh Lord, Anne, say the word fuck again and I will let you sleep in the stables.”   
“Will you grubble me then?” Anne smirked and Ann swatted her over the head lightly,

“Shut up you, mad woman. I will give you another kiss when you’re dressed for bed…”  
‘and washed your mouth.’ Ann thought shuddering. Anne ran her hands over Ann’s thighs, plucking at the thin fabric of her nightgown but Ann took her hands gently and removed them,   
“Not today, dearest.”   
“Why are you so callous? I just want to love you, devour you!” Anne pouted and Ann held her face gently,   
“I know, I love you too, but you are much too drunk to know what you’re doing, and you will regret it in the morning.”   
“I never regret anything- not you anyway.” Anne slurred and Ann kissed her nose fondly,   
“I know you don’t. Now let’s get this off.”   
Ann unbuttoned her waistcoat, and then worked her way on her skirt – pulling it off her as she seemed to have forgotten how to stand up.  
“I think you are really beautiful… I think that’s why people loathe me now – I stole away the fairest maiden of them all.” Anne beamed and Ann laughed, shaking her head,   
“You are absolute bonkers.”   
“The food was no good.” Anne pondered and Ann raised an eyebrow as she focused on getting Anne’s shirt off after having thrown her cravat aside.   
“Hm?”   
“I wish I had eaten you instead.” Anne told her and Ann flushed red,   
“I hope you didn’t say that or anything improper at dinner – revealed anything.”   
“I’m not an idiot, Adney!” Anne barked, crossing her arms, moping like a child.   
“Mm.” Ann sighed, pressing her fingers against her temples to still the on-coming headache.   
Anne then tried standing up before Ann could get her corset off and the blonde sighed frustrated as Anne stumbled across the room,   
“You’re looking a little unsteady there…”   
“Says the girl with three heads.” Anne slurred angrily and Ann had to choke back laughter, the woman in-front of her had never been this drunk before, as far as Ann was concerned and Ann didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.   
“Anne what are-“   
“I know what I’m doing!” Anne growled and the blonde shook her head,   
“Dearest, not even God knows what you’re doing!”   
“I am lost!” Anne whimpered as she had paced in the same circle for a couple of turns and Ann went over to her, placing warm and gentle hands around her,   
“Let’s get you into bed. But first let’s get rid of this.”   
Ann untied her corset swiftly and then pulled Anne’s chemise over her head, and then just looked at her for a second. Anne who normally could be rather prudish with being undressed – unless for ‘bed’, stood casually completely naked in-front of her and when she noticed Ann staring, she gave a rogue smile,  
“See anything you like?”   
Ann flushed pink and shook her head, biting her lip, before getting Anne’s nightgown and proceeded to try and put it on but not without a little struggle.   
“Anne…” Ann tried to get her attention, and Anne hummed in reply, raising a brow,   
“I need you to lift your head up.” Ann told her, as she hovered over her with the opening to her nightgown.   
“I am.” Anne mumbled, not lifting her head.   
“I need you to meet my eyes.” Ann tried,   
“Mm.”   
Anne smiled and Ann laughed at her, placing her finger under the brunette’s chin raising her eyes to meet her eyes,   
“My eyes are up here, dearest.”   
Anne then went in for a kiss which Ann granted her despite everything but then she forced her back into bed, whilst retrieving a wet cloth from her own room before proceeding to wash Anne’s mouth from the retching before.   
  
“Now we close our eyes, and we sleep, Anne!”   
“But what if poison goes bad… does it become more or less poisonous?” Anne cried frustrated and Ann screamed into her pillow,   
“Shut up and sleep or I will whack you unconscious!”   
“But, do you realise…!” Anne began to cry excitedly, and her face was greeted by a pillow.   
Finally, after a while of twisting and turning they, both of them, were asleep.   
  
In the morning – Anne was sicker than ever before. She threw up by the tiniest of movement, and Ann nursed her though the woman did protest – she felt pathetic and no doubt extremely ashamed of her behaviour the night before – but worst of all – she didn’t even remember all of it and her anxiety was great.  
  
“I’m never drinking that ever again.” Anne groaned after having emptied her already empty stomach for the tenth time that morning, Ann gave her a sympathetic smile, brushing her fingers over her clammy face to soothe her,   
“Do you want some water? Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?”   
“Oh God.” Anne groaned, her head giving her much pain, and she squinted her eyes, to which Ann responded by closing the drapes shut.   
“I feel so embarrassed – I don’t even remember… Oh God… did I ask you to *fuck* me?” Ann nodded and Anne groaned, pulling her arm over her eyes – and her stomach churned again but she wasn’t sick.   
“Oh, my Lord – I’m so sorry! We were sitting down – I thought I could handle it… I didn’t even feel it coming on until I stood up and the floor vanished under me. Forgive me?! I never drink like that – you know that. Oh God… I’m so sorry, Ann.” Anne whimpered in pure agony and Ann placed soft, cool kisses against her forehead and to her hand, following with a wet cloth to ease her discomfort.   
“No matter. It wasn’t all bad – you were quite entertaining too.”   
“I didn’t inflict myself on you, right? If I did, I will never forgive myself.”   
“No, not at all. You did want to but I said no – because I didn’t want to use you like that – and besides I think you might have thrown up in my face if we had so…” Ann smiled and kissed her temple softly,   
“Don’t worry about it, Pony.”   
“You are an angel for putting up with me.”   
“This was one night, Anne, one time. You didn’t purposefully drink too much and your body, your brain reacted badly to that Russian drink. It’s fine. You sat with me every night through my ordeal for weeks. I owe you as much. And besides, you’re my wife and I swore to love you through sickness and health – So. I’m taking care of you whether you like it or not, Lister.”  
“Oh, my… did I eat soap yesterday?” Anne asked weakly and Ann laughed softly mindful not to hurt Anne’s head more and nodded,   
“Yes, you did. I had to scoop it out of your mouth – well the little I could, that you hadn’t already swallowed.”   
“Lavender? I can still taste it. I don’t think it was any good for my bowels.”   
“No… probably not.”   
“Oh, I’m disgusting. I was disgusting. I’m so sorry!” Anne moaned again as her stomach turned and Ann smiled,  
“We are all disgusting sometimes.”  
“How very reassuring.” Anne muttered, and Ann kissed her properly, but grimaced immediately at the taste,   
“Urgh, no – you have to drink some water, Anne!”   
“Why would you kiss me? – You just saw me hurl my guts out!” Anne growled and Ann smirked,   
“Well you’re quite irresistible, Miss Lister.”

“Mm, and you are quite weird, Walker.”   
Ann laughed and then kissed her wife again despite it all – after all we are all disgusting sometimes. **  
**


	11. Slippery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Slippery
> 
> The one where Anne and Ann tries to go to church and Marian's eyes get stuck in a permanent eye roll.

Winter had finally come and hadn’t done so lightly. The snow lay thick all across the landscape and seemed intent on remaining there for a long time.   
On Christmas morning they had concluded that they must walk to church if they wanted to attend the service because the roads had snowed shut and their sleigh was not available at the moment. Anne had sighed as she glanced out the window at breakfast wearing an emerald green cravat that she had been gifted that morning.   
“I think it will be hard for you to make it to church, I’m afraid, aunt.”   
“Oh no matter. I shall go some other time. There is little to do about this snow anyway.”   
Aunt Anne brushed it off with one hand before raising her spoon of cinnamon porridge to her mouth, Anne frowned however, she did not like her aunt missing out but with her leg ulcers there was nothing much they could do about it. Her father wouldn’t be able to attend either.   
“Will you go?” Marian asked Anne with a raised eyebrow and Anne placed her teacup on the table turning her eyes towards the blonde next to her.   
“Shall we go?”   
“I think so, yes. If it’s not too much trouble.”   
“Mm, we shall go then. There’s your answer, Marian – I and Ann will attend.”   
“Then I’ll come with you. If you can do without us for the morning, aunt?”   
Marian gave their aunt a concerned look and Anne looked at her aunt intently to discern whether she was being absolutely truthful or not,  
“Yes, by all means – enjoy the service.”   
“Then that’s decided.” Anne concluded and rose from her seat, “We should get ready to walk.”   
  
They met down in the hallway fully dressed for the weather.   
“Anne don’t make a scene at church!” Marian warned her and Anne quirked her eyebrow,   
“Me making a scene? Why I never! What would that be?”   
“Picking a fight with someone, I don’t know. Some of Ann’s relatives aren’t that fond of you.”   
“I’ll deal with them in that case.” Ann replied before Anne had time to say anything and Anne smiled down at her, gesturing to her,   
“See, Ann is my guardian – she’ll keep me out of scrapes and fight for me.”   
“Don’t be patronising, Anne.” Ann tutted her and Anne shut her mouth and Marian just shook her head, how miss Walker managed to control her sister was beyond her.   
“Let’s get going.”   
Anne opened the door and the cold immediately struck them and soon enough, after only a few feet their cheeks begun to turn rosy.   
“I could kiss you now.” Anne leaned in and whispered to Ann who chuckled at her,   
“I dare you to.”   
“I will do it.” Anne smirked and Ann shook her head at her, but then Anne’s cold lips were on hers for a brief second – hardly touched them but Ann could feel her lips tingling anyway.   
“Anne! Someone could’ve seen.”   
“And what a sight to see.” Anne teased and Ann swatted her arm lightly. Marian turned around and smirked,   
“Already having trouble keeping her under control?”   
“I tell you what, Marian – next time we bring an ass to church – It’ll be simpler.” Ann retorted and whereas Anne gasped at the audacity, Marian laughed heartily.   
“Agreed.”   
“I’m not deaf you know.” Anne commented and Ann grinned at her,   
“I didn’t say that I said you were stubborn.”  
“You said I was an ass.”   
“Oh heavens, no! Anne why on earth? What has the poor beast done to be compared to you?” Ann cried and Anne rolled her eyes at her, leaning into her,   
“An- ah!” Anne and Ann shouted as they slipped on the icy path under them. Ann landed rather soft as her fall was softened by Anne’s body. The brunette however groaned slightly,   
“Ouch.”   
“Hi there.” Ann flashed white teeth as she looked into the dark orbs belonging to her wife, and Anne couldn’t help a smile despite her pain.   
“You managed that well, miss Walker.”   
“Are you suggesting I planned to trip us and fall on top of you?” Ann asked smirking, and Anne bit her lip to keep from laughing,   
“Maybe. I don’t mind this – you on top. I do mind the stone in my back.”  
“Oh, are you alright?” Ann’s smirk was immediately turned into a worried frown and Anne nodded, kissing her hand,   
“I’m alright. I always am.”   
“If you two could please get up?” Marian stood tapping her foot beside them now and both Ann(e)’s looked up and blushed, and then tried getting up, clutching to each other for balance as they kept slipping on the ice under them. Finally, they were somewhat steady again, but they held on to one another to be sure and walked a few wobbly steps as they laughed merrily into each other’s sides. Marian rolled her eyes but smiled at them,   
“You two are hopeless- I don’t know why we bother taking you out.”   
“Oh, come on, Marian – we are hilarious to be around.”   
“That you are. Anyone see that and you’d be the talk of town.”  
“I’d- ah!” Anne was interrupted again, but she wasn’t the one slipping this time – Ann did and as she fell, she pulled Anne with her. Anne glared at her in the snow,   
“Seriously?”   
“I’m sorry, I lost my balance and I… you’ve snow in your eyelashes.” Ann was distracted and her hand went up to Anne’s eyes, and she closed her eyes at the touch.   
“I have?”   
“Mm. It’s making them sparkle. I love your eyes. They are like deep pools of rich chocolate.” Ann smiled and Anne chuckled, opening her eyes again,   
“Really?”   
“I want to kiss you right now.” Ann mumbled, only for Anne’s ears, and the brunette smiled sadly,   
“I want to kiss you too.”   
“Just kiss! There is no one here – but seriously, do practice your whispering.” Marian told them annoyed, rolling her eyes and both women looked up and laughed but they did however kiss but only very briefly and Marian sighed as they finally stood up,   
“You are awfully cute together – do you know that? It’s annoying really. They will write stories with love like yours.”   
“My what happened to you, Marian – why are you being nice suddenly?” Anne teased and her sister rolled her eyes,   
“I guess you slipped into my heart again – both of you!”  
The women smiled at that and then proceeded to walk the of the way to church without any hiccups, but only with the help of Marian – they held onto each other as they walked, and people raised their eyebrows as they came wandering up the path to church. But they didn’t mind – they were all three of them laughing merrily as the snow fell lightly around them, it was a glorious day!   
  
“The service was nice.” Marian said as they got ready to leave church, after having had a chat with friends and neighbours as well as some of their tenants.   
“I thought the preaching a tad dry but otherwise fine. He did twenty minutes last Sunday and today he managed twenty-four – he would do well to shorten his sermons if he cannot avoid repeating himself for the better part of fifteen minutes.” Anne replied to that and slid her gloves onto her hands as they left church. Marian merely scowled at her sister – she always liked to think of herself as a good judge of theology and if not that – a doctor or whatever else she was doing.   
Anne fell into step with Ann, and walked closely to her and whispered, barely moving her lips,   
“Are you alright? None too mean?”   
“I’m fine. It’s just, them being them. It just hurt me a bit is all.” Ann mumbled in reply and immediately Anne’s hand grazed her arm, trying to comfort her without drawing attention to themselves.   
“It’s a shame they find it necessary to be so. But maybe I can cheer you up when we get back – I’ll even sing Christmas carols with you.”  
Ann’s lips turned upwards at that and a chuckle escaped her,   
“I’d like that.”   
“Yeee…“ Anne had walked on blue ice on the church path and was sent flying bringing Ann with her – this time she landed atop the blonde who groaned from the pain the thud brought her. People around them stopped and turned around to stare – obviously they had seen her slip so they could see nothing untoward. But as Anne pressed herself up on her hands, she gave Ann a smirk and murmured,  
“I think I fell in love with you just now.”   
“Argh, get off me!” Ann laughed and Anne grinned wide as she rolled off Ann, then they tried getting up, clutching at each other’s arms to find balance which they finally regained after some struggle, and they stood up, brushing the snow off their coats whilst laughing merrily,   
“You two! How are you so much like a cow on ice?” Marian called, making sure everyone heard, she wanted no one to be able to say anything about neither her sister nor, Ann.   
“New shoes!” Anne pointed at her black shoes, grinning,   
“We forgot to rasp them off – so they are really slippery.” Ann agreed and Marian just shook her head laughing,   
“Whatever will we do with the pair of you! You’ll be bruised black and blue by the time we get back to Shibden.”   
“I don’t know – I think slipping has served us well today.” Anne murmured to Ann whose cheeks flushed slightly but she smirked,   
“That it has, and I can think of another slippery slope we should go down.”   
“Really, Miss Walker? Well, you shall find me no object to whatever your heart is set on having!” **  
**


	12. Defend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Defend
> 
> The sun wakes Ann up and she is grumpy.

There was of course benefits of summer arriving – one of those being not having to wear five hundred layers of clothing to keep remotely warm but there was also a great enemy during summer; the heat and the early morning sun.   
  
Ann groaned as the offending sunlight shone in through the curtains that didn’t quite shut all the way – they had been far too excited last night to realise their mistake. And now, as morning came the sun crept inside and bathed her face in light, warming her – uncomfortably so and she twisted in bed to escape it. The brunette sleeping beside her stirred and a warm hand ran across her arm to stop her writhing,   
“Ann… are you alright?” Anne asked tiredly, her eyes still shut, and the blonde groaned again into her side,   
“What’s the light?”   
“You mean the sun?” Anne chuckled opening her dark eyes to gaze at her wife, who lay with her eyes tightly shut to try and escape the offending sunlight and she whined again,   
“I’ll fight it.”   
Anne kissed her over the hair fondly,   
“Come on I’ll defend you against it.”   
Anne pulled the covers higher, and helped Ann closer to her, the woman lay with her legs over Anne’s body and her arms circled around her waist, and she hid her face in the crook of the brunette’s neck. Anne kissed the side of her face sweetly, smiling down at the blonde.   
“You are beautiful.”   
“I’m sleeping.”   
“A sleeping beauty then.” Anne smirked and another soft kiss was pressed against the top of her head.   
“Shut up, Anne.”   
“Good morning to you too.”   
“You defended me against the sunlight, now please defend me from yourself by being quiet.” Ann growled nipping at her neck as she did so.   
“Woke up on the wrong side today, love?” Anne asked glancing down and Ann growled as she stretched her legs all the way across Anne and heaved herself up, placing herself on top of the brunette properly,  
“Ann, I asked did you…” Anne wasn’t allowed to finish her sentence, Ann’s lips muffled her sounds and silenced her.   
“We sleep now.”   
“I know you want to - but I need to rise now.” Anne told her softly in her ear, and the blonde groaned,   
“No. You stay. I’m cold.”   
Ann held on tighter to Anne, pressing her body into hers, making it near impossible for her to move.   
“I thought you were hot?” Anne wondered amused, and Ann nuzzled her face into her neck further,   
“I’m defending you against the cold.”   
“Yes, whereas that’s nice of you…”   
Anne tried to throw the covers off them – she was sweating, and her skin was turning clammy by the warmth. Ann kissed the brunette again to shut her up,   
“Be grateful.”   
“Fine.”   
Anne gave in, gave Ann another kiss and then held her tightly pressed against herself, pulling the covers off them though – basking in the joy of having her wife pressed to her, near her – and she trailed many kisses over her soft but moist skin and Ann got to rest for as long as she liked, not that Anne really had say in it. **  
**


	13. Armour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Armour
> 
> Anne thinks that sometimes her clothes work as a sort of armour for herself.  
> Catherine questions her style and...
> 
> (This would have never happened in reality but I didn't know what to write for the prompt so here we are.  
> Besides I based some of the thoughts on Marie Dentiére who were an early 'feminist' during the reformation you should check her out - she was very cool!)

Sometimes when Anne dressed, she felt as if though she was dressing in armour. When the cravat was tied, she felt ready to face the world and anything it would throw at her. She wasn’t vulnerable she was brave and vigorous. No one could hurt her – she would rise above it. She was shielded from mean words and the raining bullets of rumours, hatred and prejudice. Anne felt safe. But as soon as she undressed for the night she felt as though her armour had been stripped from her and her heart ached. Things of the day would replay, and she would grieve or laugh or whatever feelings arose – she was only human after all.   
It was natural to be upset, but during the days with her armour on, not much could sway her.   
She was a warrior, she had to be, or she couldn’t live true to herself. She would have been brought down by all the ill-words and doings against her a long time ago.   
  
“Do you ever feel like you’re being watched?” Catherine asked at tea that same morning and Anne raised an eyebrow,   
“All the time. When you look this good, you get used to it.”   
Catherine wasn’t sure it was a jest, but Ann laughed at her kindly, before she gave Anne a look that went from head to toe wearing a smirk – she agreed with Anne’s sarcastic comment, she couldn’t take her eyes of her most of the time.   
“I thought…” Catherine trailed off, blushing as if she remembered it might be quite a rude thing to point out but Anne Lister understood exactly what she were about to say and smirked,   
“But you were asking because you think I’m odd, masculine and wondered if I am bothered by the stares. The answer is no. I’m not. I feel empowered wearing what I do because it reflects a sense of me. I am however a little insulted at the masculinity part – because why cannot a woman be intelligent and smart? Or express her style for that matter.”   
“I just wondered if you felt annoyed by the stares.” Catherine confessed and Anne smiled,   
“Sometimes. But on the whole no. It’s great being me, I’d say it’s rather the circumstances and what’s around me that sucks in those cases.”   
Marian rolled her eyes at her sister,  
“You don’t always have to pretend to be so tough, Anne. We all know you hate it when people mistake you for a man.”   
“Well, that’s a different thing entirely because men are vicious things often and stupid at that too and to be likened with one of them is insulting. However, I also feel – it’s fine when they notice the height or see me from behind and say ‘Sir’ but when they look right at me and still thinks ‘Sir’ is the right option – then that’s just plain idiocy.”   
“Not all men are stupid! They are individuals – they aren’t all the same. They have different interests, minds and style.” Catherine protested and Anne smiled,   
“Mm. It’s funny you say that, here’s a surprise for you, that’s how women work too. But we aren’t taught to be individuals by society – we are taught to be meek and obedient wives, sisters and daughters. So next time someone insults me to you, you may reply; No, Miss Lister is not odd- she is a human being and she just so happens to have different interests to you and a mind of her own – she’s an individual and shouldn’t be judged by the generalisation society has created and formed.”   
“I’m so confused.” Marian whispered to Ann, “Is she in a fight or not?”   
“She is and she’s winning.” Ann mumbled.   
“But it’s not the same with women.” Catherine argued, and Anne pulled a hand over her face,   
“God give me patience!”   
“I think you mean strength.” Catherine pointed out and Anne removed her hand from her eyes,   
“If God gave me strength, everyone would be dead.”   
“Okay… but I still think you’re wrong.”   
“Well, that’s up to you – whether you would like to remain ignorant or not.” Anne smiled and Catherine frowned, annoyed,  
“You enjoy silently judging everyone, don’t you, Miss Lister!?”   
“When have I ever done anything silently?” Anne asked and Ann and Marian raised their teacups,   
“Cheers to that!”   
Anne stood this fight down too and patted her waistcoat – it was good to be armoured sometimes and it was equally good to have someone take it off time and time again. **  
**


	14. Birthday cake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Birthday Cake.
> 
> Ann wants to surprise Anne for her birthday... the others aren't convinced it's a good idea. This might just be my favourite one!

It was a chilly morning, but the sun was shining in through the window and giving them light at the breakfast table. They had all almost finished breakfast and Ann was starting to get impatient, her leg was unconsciously starting to jump, her foot tapping lightly against the oak boards. Anne threw her napkin on the table after wiping the corner of her full lips, and eyed the occupants at the table,   
“Well, I’d better be off if I’m going to make it back in time for dinner.”   
“Shall we set a place for you or not?” Marian enquired annoyed, knowing that her sister was always running late – not caring about the fact that they waited for her.   
“We have had the same conversation for twenty years, Marian – just set the table and if I, against all odds, shouldn’t arrive on time – then take it off for God’s sake, it isn’t harder than that.”   
“Anne you are so, so – obnoxious! You don’t care about-“ Marian began, her chest heaving up and down but she stopped when Ann put a hand on her arm, and said with a sweet smile,  
“Don’t work yourself up over her, Marian – you cannot change her. And besides, if she’s not here then maybe we can invite Mr Jones who helped us so kindly when I tripped the other day in Halifax.”   
They could see how Anne’s jaw tightened and her knuckles clench, and she looked sour indeed,   
“I’ll be here on the dot. Don’t invite anyone else!”   
“We’ll see about that.” Ann smiled up at the brunette who scowled,   
“I think we might have a problem then.” Anne said seriously and the whole mood changed at the table and Marian were about to stand and defend the blonde against her irate sister. But Ann tilted her head,   
“No, YOU, have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps getting into one.”   
Marian had to mask her laughter with a cough and Aunt Anne began wheezing from laughing so hard but trying to hide it and Jeremy merely smiled into his porridge.   
“Oh, I have… I’m an… that’s hilarious. We do have a problem though – and that’s inviting people I don’t know for dinner.”   
Anne wouldn’t let it go and Ann merely smirked,  
“You call it a problem, I call it a solution.”  
“Ann, this is outrageous!” Anne growled, but Ann didn’t stand down she chinned up and stared directly into the dark, upset orbs belonging to Anne,   
“It’s really not. If you are on time – that is to say 18 o’clock on the dot, we won’t invite him. Stop making such a fuss – you stare at that ridiculous pocket-watch all the time so I think you’ll manage that fine – unless you can’t tell time.”   
“You are…”  
“You better go now, Anne or you might not make it back in time.” Ann smirked pointing at the clock,   
“Urgh.”   
“Tick-tock.” Ann smiled and the woman glared at them before walking off and out of the house.   
“I could just kiss you! How you handle her is amazing!” Marian laughed and Ann smirked at her,   
“It’s not hard. She’s a real softie once you know her sore spots.”   
“Who is that gentleman you talked about?” Aunt Anne asked with a quirked eyebrow and Marian and Ann looked at each other and began laughing,   
“You know the man in church – who is really tall, muscular and brown-haired?” Marian asked and her aunt nodded,   
“That’s the guy.”   
“You don’t think, Anne will pick a fight with him?” Aunt Anne asked worriedly, and they shook their heads,   
“She has too much to do. But she’ll be on time tonight for sure.”   
“Now, I did have a reason to get her out of the house – it’s her birthday tomorrow and I thought we could do something for her.” Ann said excitedly but suddenly all eyes avoided hers, and she wrinkled her forehead in confusion,  
“What?”   
“Oh, eh, Anne doesn’t celebrate her birthdays anymore.” Marian told her with a half-smile,   
“She gets mad at anyone who mentions it and has forbidden us to make any sort of fuss at all.” Aunt Anne agreed and Ann stared at them,  
“You’re not serious?!”   
“Unfortunately, we are. Don’t take it personally, Ann – she doesn’t do them and I’m afraid we all learned that the hard way. So, I’m not in.” Marian told her and Ann frowned,   
“But…”   
“I’m sorry, dear. I have promised to respect my nieces wishes on that account.” Aunt Anne told her with a sad smile and Ann bit her lip in thought,   
“But I haven’t – so I’ll do it in any case. She deserves to be celebrated.”   
“That she does but she loathes it. I’m not sure why – I think something went wrong once, on her birthday… a disappointment with… eh, the government.” Aunt Anne glanced at Marian with some trepidation – she didn’t know just how aware Ann was of Anne’s past.   
“Then I’ll just make her associate it with good again and next year we can have a huge celebration.” Ann smiled positive about the thing the occupants around the table were not equally so.  
“You’re on your own, I’m afraid. We have had enough of the Queen of rage.” Marian told her and Ann shrugged her shoulders,  
“Oh I think it will be fine.” 

Ann decided that every birthday needed a cake, so she went into the kitchen to ask Mrs. Cordingley and Hemingway to make one for the morrow. The women looked up and stopped whatever they were doing for a second, the talk died out too as always, Ann smiled nervously at them,  
“I was just going to ask whether you could make a cake for tomorrow since it’s Anne’s birthday.”   
“Eh, no ma’am.” Mrs. Cordingley stuttered and Ann frowned – had the servant just refused her request? That was a first.   
“Why not?”  
“Because um, the mistress has said that whoever makes a birthday cake for her again will be turned out without mercy.” Mrs. Cordingley replied, her cheeks flustered, and Ann sighed, of course Anne had threatened everyone in the household.   
“Fine. I’ll make it. But I need you to show me how.” Ann told the woman who seemed surprised,   
“I wouldn’t do it if I were you, Miss Walker. She becomes a dragon, and no one wants to be near then.”   
“Ah, she’s not that dangerous. I’ll take her on if that’s the case. Will you show me how to make a cake?”   
“Um, yes – of course, ma’am.”   
“Good, thank you so much. I’ll be remembering this. Now, we need to do it whilst she is still out, so she doesn’t know.” Ann told the women and they nodded both a little weary about this whole operation since they both remembered the last time someone had tried to celebrate the mistress birthday.   
Ann proved herself to be a diligent student, and she wasn’t afraid to get a little dirty – she did her absolute best during the instructions by the two women and produced something resembling a cake – it was quite horrendous and Ann laughed at the sight with Mrs. Cordingley and Hemingway,   
“It’s truly singular.” Mrs. Cordingley tried to say something positive about it and Ann laughed,   
“Then it’ll suit the recipient fine.”   
“You can put it in here – she won’t look here anyway.” Hemingway pointed at the cupboard and Ann nodded gratefully,  
“Perfect. Thank you, ladies.” 

They were all sat down for dinner, having said the prayers when Anne came bustling in through the doors, hat almost off,  
“I’M HERE! Don’t invite anyone!”   
The tables occupants almost began laughing at her, and Ann pointed at her seat,  
“Unfortunately, you are two minutes late and we took mercy on poor Mr. Jones – he is just asking the servants for more potatoes.”   
“What? You gave him my seat! My seat! Why would he need to sit next to you!” Anne cried upset and it took all self-control for all of them not to die laughing at her dramatics.  
“Well, I might need someone who can lift the heavy saucer and such – it’s good to finally have a man around the house – right Marian?” Ann smiled innocently at Marian who currently almost choked on her wine.   
“Mm.”   
“That’s… That’s… urgh… I can lift a saucer!” Anne barked and Ann couldn’t help but laugh at her and when she had started the others quickly followed, confusing Anne,   
“Anne… there is no one here. Sit down!” Ann laughed and pulled out her chair for her and she sat down growling, but her cheeks were flushed red.  
“We’ll talk about this later.” Anne mumbled to the blonde and she flashed an innocent smile,   
“Come on, it was a joke.”   
“Oh, this is far from over. I’m going to get you back. My way.” Anne muttered to the blonde her eyes intently focused on her and the blonde flushed,   
“So I guess it’s safe to say that I will die tonight but little.” Ann announced and whilst the occupants laughed unknowing Anne just gasped and looked at Ann with clear disbelief. 

Ann had barely slept a wink all night, too excited about the morning and the fact that she had managed to keep everything a secret from Anne. Maybe she was a little apprehensive about Anne actually getting mad from what everyone had been telling her, but her excitement overshadowed that. She was up before the brunette which was in all fairness something highly unusual as Anne always woke up at about five in the morning. Ann could barely contain herself from jumping on the bed shouting happy birthday, but she thought, that might not be the best nor the most dignified way to go about it. Instead Ann crawled nearer to her sleeping form, placing her hands on either side of her before leaning down and capturing her lips in a slow kiss. Anne moaned in her sleep, and then slowly one eye opened to glance down at the blonde,   
“Hm?”   
“Happy Birthday, Anne!” Ann smiled before kissing her again, but Anne frowned,   
“Don’t say that.” Anne growled and Ann raised a surprised eyebrow, and sat up next to Anne, holding her hand, stroking her knuckles with her thumb absentmindedly,   
“Why not?”   
“I don’t celebrate my birthdays.” Anne muttered,  
“Why is that? Is it because it makes you feel old? Because I would argue that forty-three is not a lot and women are like wine – they just get better by every year.”   
“With that logic Aunt must’ve have been a greater bargain.” Anne retorted and Ann nodded,  
“Well she wasn’t interested so I settled for second best.” Ann shrugged her shoulders but then glanced down at Anne smiling,   
“Stop growling, Anne – it’s your birthday.”   
Ann placed a kiss on her lips, but she still looked as though someone had just told her she was an idiot, or you know – a man.   
“I just don’t want to talk about it.”   
“But we will need to talk about it – because otherwise you’re just going to hate this whole day and the fact that I may or may not have gotten you a birthday gift and… made a cake.” Ann frowned at the brunette, brushing hair out of her dark eyes gently, before kissing her again.   
“Ann…” Anne growled but Ann wouldn’t listen, instead she threw her leg over Anne’s abdomen and sat over her staring down at her,   
“Tell me. I’m still going to give you your birthday gifts and the cake because you deserve it. Clearly – for staying alive this long with all the scrapes you’ve been into.”   
“Fine! I haven’t for years, not really, no reason – just was never around. Then… you… promised me – to tell me on the third and everything went to hell and I lost it.” Anne cried annoyed, and Ann shut her mouth and Anne glared at her, with tears prickling her eyes,  
“Happy now?”   
“No. I’m sorry. But I’m here now, and all is well. I just wanted to show you some appreciation and love. I guess I should’ve listened to Marian and your aunt.” Ann’s whole stance sank, and Anne sighed and rubbed her hands-on Ann’s thighs,   
“No. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t… I cannot cling to every bad thing I’ve been through – I know you don’t. I’m being selfish. It’s very kind of you to care about me.”   
“Don’t you dare say that, Anne!” Ann told her and she looked confused,   
“What?”   
“Care?! I, blooming love you, idiot.” Ann smiled and kissed her wife soundly on the lips and the brunette’s hands went up to hold her face,   
“I love you too.”   
“I made a cake for you.” Ann laughed and pointed at the side table and Anne looked at it and tried not to laugh,   
“It’s a piece of art. Unusual art – and I thought you had a lot of appreciation of it.”  
Ann swatted her playfully but smiled still,  
“I do have a lot of appreciation for art. I know a masterpiece when I see one and I know, trust me, I know how to appreciate it.”   
“Really?” Anne asked with a quirked eyebrow, and Ann leant down – an inch away from her lips,   
“I married you, didn’t I?”   
“Minx!” Anne laughed and kissed her,   
“Now I have three gifts for you, one of them which are…” Ann wasn’t allowed to finish her sentence as Anne budged in,   
“If you say something cheesy like ‘I want to pin you to the wall like the piece of art you are’ I will be mad.”  
“What if I want you to pin me to the wall like the piece of art I am?” Ann retorted and Anne looked up at her speechless for a few seconds,  
“Well, then that’s a maybe.”   
“It’s not my gift though – I don’t know why you would think that. My gifts are thoughtful and full of love – I am going to romance your freaking arse off.” Ann smirked and Anne laughed,   
“Oh wow, that’s beautiful - is that Shakespeare?”   
“Lie still.” Ann told her and then proceeded with the first gift. 

They came down to breakfast were everyone was waiting nervously; Marian was looking at Ann as if to discern whether there was some damage done to her.   
“It’s Anne’s birthday today…” Ann began, and everyone glanced nervously at the brunette who rolled her eyes,   
“Ah you don’t need to look so worried. It’s fine. I’m forty-three and it’s been a great forty-three thus far.”   
Ann smirked at the woman and the occupants breathed a sigh of relief.   
“Thank God, you have Ann for companion, or we might still fear the wrath of you.” Marian told her with an attitude and Aunt Anne glanced at Marian sharply,   
“We’ve been blessed. Now, how did it all come about initially?”   
“Mm, I guess it all changed when Ann asked me to come for dinner and stay all night.”   
Anne wiggled her eyebrows at Ann who became beet red in the face and wanted to be swallowed by the ground and disappear.   
“Well then, let us toast to that.” Aunt Anne said and winked at Ann who at the moment was redder than ever before.   
“And a very happy birthday for our favourite An-… I guess we can’t really say that, now can we? There are literally three of us in the room… to our favourite…” Aunt Anne trailed off,  
“Of the day?” Ann suggested,  
“Yes, good, excellent – to our favourite of the day!”


	15. Wild

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mariana comes to visit and Ann goes wild... (This would have never happened either but here we are...)

Ann Walker was sat inside the sitting room of Shibden, drawing in her sketchpad when Marian came inside hurriedly,   
“Where’s Anne?”   
“What am I, her keeper?” Ann quirked an eyebrow and Marian looked at her for a second, tilting her head with a frown,   
“Well, aren’t you?”   
“Um no not really.” Ann retorted and Marian stared at the blonde,   
“But you know where she is?”   
“Urgh, she’s outside waiting for…” Ann stopped as her shoulders tensed visibly at the sound of a carriage, Marian craned her neck to look out and then heard Ann mumble,   
“that bitch.”   
“I take it you haven’t warmed much to Mrs. Lawton?” Mariana said amused, and Ann blushed slightly at being heard, but shook her head,   
“Well, it didn’t go great last time, did it? And besides she is so mean to Anne – I don’t know why they are even friends still.”   
“Beats me. I don’t like her either.”   
“I’m going out for a few hours.” Ann told Marian putting her sketchpad under her arm,   
“Alrighty, but, wait – through the window?”   
“That’s the only way I’ll get past them without needing to talk to her.” Ann defended herself, and she looked positively wild when she readied herself to escape through the window. Marian left the door open, and went to open the front door, and Ann could hear Anne’s voice,  
“Is Ann in here?”   
“Uh, you know what…” Marian stalled for a few seconds as Ann threw herself out the window,   
“She just left.”   
“Really too bad we should miss, Miss Walker.” Mrs. Lawton said but didn’t sound so sorry, and Marian put on a strained smile, as she noticed Ann creeping up to the window to retrieve her pencil,   
“Yeah…”   
Ann ran off behind the house and Marian looked at the people stood in front of her again,  
“Sorry.”   
Ann could still hear them talk as she ventured on the backside of the house, or more she heard them laugh and it tore through her – she really didn’t like Mrs. Lawton. She always unnerved her in a bad way. Because she constantly insulted and talked down to her.   
Ann walked to the pits, and then continued away to the glen nearby, it was by the burn and she thought the water calming and soothing to her turbulent inner. She couldn’t help it. She trusted Anne with her life – it was Mariana she didn’t trust. Not even with a strand of her hair. Not at all. She was cunning and devious. A devil in disguise. Anne had asked her if she was alright with Mariana coming to stay for a day and Ann had said that she might do as she like but in a way that Anne should have known better than to invite that goat to stay. Ann slumped down by the bank and huffed.   
“How is this always how it ends? Me alone in the fucking forest.”   
Ann couldn’t help it, her head was full of images of possible scenarios in her absence but rather she was away than having to listen to all of Mariana’s sleezy comments and disgusting flirting. What if she was right, Mariana would always have a foot in?   
“Ah here we go… my trail of thought or as I like to call it – the anxiety express.” Ann muttered to no one but herself, bringing her sketchpad to the light. It was nice to be out in the wilderness and she decided to draw some wildflowers, but she couldn’t focus, a certain brown-eyed idiot was on her mind. After five hours Ann gave up, whilst it was nice sitting out in the wild – it was getting cold and there was no sign of her wife. Ann rolled her eyes,   
“No, she hasn’t time for you – she has her friend over… her stupid, idiot friend who should do better on the other side of the earth – even that would be too close.”   
Ann made it back to Shibden in time for dinner, actually she was a little late, but no one seemed to notice but Marian and Aunt Anne – in conclusion the one person who should’ve noticed were deeply engrossed in a conversation about something with Mrs. Lawton and Mrs. Lawton had taken Ann’s seat. It shouldn’t have bothered Ann, she should’ve just swallowed it, but bile rose in her throat and she though silent about it – went wild in her mind.   
‘That bitch.” Ann thought angrily as she sat down next to Aunt Anne who was much more aware of Ann’s peace of mind than Anne. She took hold of her hand and squeezed it sympathetically and Marian gave her a kind look from across the table, mouthing the word,   
‘Bitch’ with a nod towards Mrs. Lawton and Ann had to bite her lip not to laugh. But suddenly she was at the centre of attention with Mrs. Lawton who gave her a look,   
“I heard what you thought of my ordeal with -, why, from what you’ve been saying it sounds like you’ve been telling everyone I’m an idiot!”   
“Oh, I’m sorry.” Ann looked at the woman who seemed to smirk at her submission but then Ann smiled,   
“I didn’t know it was a secret.”   
Marian hit her fist against the table, and then covered her mouth not to laugh and Aunt Anne took her hand under the table shaking it with vigour. Ann stared down Mrs. Lawton and she could see Anne was doing her best not to let any feelings show on her face, but she winked at her quickly and Ann felt wild.   
“Now I’m going to bed, before we say something we might regret.” Ann said, throwing her napkin on the table,   
“She’s not even seven?” Mrs. Lawton questioned with a certain mockery and Ann smiled,  
“Time isn’t real.”   
Ann had come to the doorway when she heard Mrs. Lawton exclaim to the others,   
“She sure is an odd one? Wherever did you find her? At a mad house?”   
“What’s your problem?” Ann came back inside, her eyes looking positively wild, and Mariana looked up shocked but then threw her a mean glance, but Ann wouldn’t wield, she stood firmly in front of her not to be moved,   
“Now tell me. Because you seem to have no problem doing it to them. If you have an opinion don’t be so weak as not stand by it when faced with it. Tell me what’s your problem?”   
“My problem? Now calm down there, Miss Walker – I’d say it is you who have a problem. This is… you’re wild.” Mariana spewed and Ann raised an eyebrow,   
“Maybe I am, but here’s the thing; I won’t be talked down to or belittled in my own home. Yes, and I don’t care about your claim that you’ve known Anne for longer because all you’ve ever done to her is use her for your own egoistic amusement. You should be ashamed the way you’ve treated her and other people around you! I might be wild and mad or whatever attribute you’d like to assign me, but it is far better than being a cold heartless bitch!”   
The rooms occupants seemed stunned into silence by Ann’s sudden courage and fierceness but eventually Mariana found her voice,   
“How dare you!? And what if I’m a little reserved towards you – you aren’t good enough for her in any case – she’ll get bored of you – I know she will – I have known her since she was seventeen. You will mean nothing to her then.”  
“Oh, I dare, and I will. You made your choice, in fact you made it twenty years ago. You can’t have the cake and eat it too. You have sown the whirlwind and you will reap it. I don’t know about you but I cherish my friendships and the people around me with love. I’m not embarrassed by them and I don’t bully them. You don’t even deserve her friendship – how you have kept it is beyond me. Toxic is what it is, and I suppose it’s got to do with the childhood trauma of never being loved.” Ann hissed and Mariana frowned,   
“I don’t have any childhood trauma!”   
“I wasn’t talking of you. Anyway, I’ll retire, and I hope you have a nice journey away from here tomorrow morning.” Ann gave her a pointed look and no chance to retort but she daren’t glance at Anne before venturing upstairs. When Ann closed the door to the bedroom the lump in her throat made it hard to breath and she bit her fist not to let out any sobs, but the tears leaked down her cheeks anyway. Maybe she was right, maybe eventually, Anne would tire of her and discard of her. Ann didn’t even undress, just lay down on bed, with her face pressed to the pillow as she cried herself to sleep.   
Ann woke up in the middle of the night from soft kisses being pressed to her cheek and to the corner of her mouth. Ann turned, squinting in the dark and saw Anne lying next to her in bed, she took her hand and pressed another kiss to her knuckles,   
“You’re here.” Ann mumbled sleepily, and she smiled,   
“Where else would I be, Ann?”   
“I…” Ann trailed off and Anne frowned,   
“Don’t even say it. Don’t even think it. I would never trade what I have with you for that. I thought you were brave today. She got exactly what she deserved.”   
She felt new kisses peppered on her face and she lifted her lips to meet Anne’s.   
“I was afraid that I overstepped the mark.”   
“Oh, you did, and you did so brilliantly. I am perhaps a little ashamed of how on point you were with that remark about my childhood trauma.” Anne said softly, lying close, and Ann blushed,   
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”   
“No but you should, it made me realise what tied me to her for so long even when she was a right down…”   
“Bitch?”   
“Mm, just so. It’s because I had issues with my mother.”   
“Still I ruined dinner.” Ann whispered ashamed and Anne kissed her fondly,   
“Ruined it? I don’t think my father, aunt or Marian have ever had a nicer meal with Mary, they all hate her.”   
“They do?”   
“Mm.”   
“That’s why your aunt shook my hand so hard I thought it would fall off.” Ann chuckled and Anne laughed, and kissed her nose,   
“Yes, and I would’ve too but…”   
“You don’t want to fall out with her.” Ann muttered bitterly and Anne stroke her cheek,   
“I’d rather not. But only because it’s such a fuss to do so. She is leaving first thing tomorrow and then she won’t be back – probably ever.”   
“I hate how she talks to you more than the way she belittles me. She is so mean. What she says to you and how she insults you all the time.” Ann told Anne stroking her cheek and the woman smiled,   
“You are such a dear for looking out for me. I thought you were magnificent when you defended me. You always complain that you aren’t brave, but you have a stronger backbone than any of us.”   
“Which is highly ironic.” Ann muttered and Anne laughed before kissing her again,   
“Mm, now, how are you? You’ve been crying, I can tell. Your lips taste salty.”   
“It was just the wild emotional overload of that fight and everything really. She makes me feel as if I’m not enough – and then I worry there is some truth to what she says.”   
“That I will tire of you?” Anne asked kindly and Ann nodded biting her lip, and the brunette sighed and embraced her and brought her closer to her chest, kissing her over the hair,   
“I could never tire of you. I love you! Do you know, my uncle told me once – he said, ‘Annie, find yourself someone who deserves you and who makes climbing mountains a poor adventure in comparison’ and you are that person. I don’t even deserve you; you are amazing, excellent and I cannot believe some days that you put up with me – that you agreed to love me forever and that you married me. You are far more deserving than anyone.”   
“I love you too, Anne. You are my one and only adventure.”   
“I’m happy to be. Now let’s get you out of these clothes so you might sleep without waking up to a sore back and neck.”   
“Is this when we make-up and make you one heck of a journal entry for the morrow?” Ann smirked and Anne laughed gaily and kissed her soundly,   
“Yes – this is why, this is why you are the truest and greatest adventure of my life!”


	16. Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Storm
> 
> ...

She stood alone in the storm, rain and wind picking at her hair, stinging her skin. Nothing had gone according to her plan. And now she was alone… again.  
‘Each morning I get up I die a little and can barely stand on my feet.’ Anne thought as the rain hit her across the face. This had been her last chance at love. She was getting too old for this. Nevertheless, it wasn’t even about that. This whole storm she had ridden through all her adult life had been bearable, Anne had always come out of it better or more determined. She had always kept hope up that someday, and somewhere was someone waiting for her. Someone who would love her for who she was and who would be brave enough to spend a life with her. It had always been alright with every love she had had, she had always thought that she would be pleased, if she needed not face the world alone. It all ended sometime though. No one dared stay with her for long and she would brace the storm and ride through the pain that brought her and the loneliness that followed. There would be more loves to have, and clearly they hadn’t been it. But now, Anne fought back a sob that came regardless, now she was done. She had found her soulmate, had found the love of her life – the one and true love and she had given her up because fear had set in. Anne had tried to stop it but couldn’t. The storm kept rolling in, roaring and great – she would always be alone. She would never find anyone new she had lost the single most important thing to her and couldn’t get it back. It was all over. She wouldn’t have her; she had married someone else. Like they all had. Because, Anne thought – maybe it was convenient. Anne saw them now, as she stood in the rain, she saw them through the windows of their home, they were unaware of her, their world continuing to turn whilst hers fell apart before her eyes. Another sob shook her body, but she couldn’t take her eyes of them – her love with that beast. How could she do that to her? How could she leave her for someone who didn’t deserve her and didn’t love her? Anne sank to her knees in the mud, she could feel its coldness and wetness as she brought her shaking hands up to her face, screaming at the top of her lungs – trying to escape the anxiety and pain. Tears ran down her cheeks rapidly and suddenly she felt a warm hand rustling her shoulder,   
“Anne.”   
Anne frowned, no it couldn’t be, she was inside the house with him,   
“Anne, come on look at me!”   
Anne slowly opened her eyes and found herself in bed back at Shibden. She could feel tears on her face, and the cover was tangled around her feet and her nightgown soaked in sweat,   
“Where am I?” Anne mumbled shutting her eyes tightly and opening them again, she had been in a field.   
“At Shibden You had a nightmare, I think? Because you were screaming bloody murder.” The soft voice told her, and she could feel a hand touching her cheek, and finally Anne dared look to her side. There she was right next to her, in her nightgown, looking worried back at her, it had only been a dream, it wasn’t true, she was right next to her,   
“Ann?! Thank God.” Anne sobbed throwing herself at the woman who startled slightly but put her arms around her immediately as Anne cried into her nape of her neck,   
“What’s the matter, darling?” Ann spoke softly, running light fingers over her drenched back,   
“I, you were, gone and I thought I’d lost you.”   
“Lost me? How?”   
“I saw you with a… man with him the beastly thing.” Anne mumbled and Ann sighed into her dark hair, kissing her there fondly,   
“Oh, you know I would never leave you… especially not for a man.”   
“It was so real… I thought… God, I don’t know what I would do if I lost you, Ann.” Anne kissed her desperately on the lips, and Ann responded in kind.   
“I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere. It was only a dream. I love you, and I do not regret marrying you for a second.”   
“I love you too. I’m sorry I woke you up…” Anne began to grow embarrassed and Ann kissed her twice, smiling,   
“No, don’t be. If you’re having bad dreams, thoughts or whatever – I’m the one to wake. Every second spent with you is worthwhile.”   
“You are an angel.” Anne mumbled and supported herself on her elbows to kiss her wife better, Ann moaned,   
“Hallelujah.”   
Anne began laughing with Ann at that and they kissed each other happily. Anne lay on top of Ann weighing her down, kissing her lazily,   
“I cannot believe that you’re mine… mine, mine! That you’re here and that I get to do this.” Anne ran her tongue over her bottom lip, nibbling at it before sneaking it inside to run against her palette and all Ann did was moan pleasurably in reply.   
“I think it is a bigger feat that I bagged Miss Lister.” Ann replied with a phony smile, and Anne laughed,   
“No, believe me – I was desperate and would cling to anyone – you on the other hand… God you are so beautiful, you, Miss Walker could have anyone and you chose me.”  
“Anne… I’m not going to believe for one second that you were desperate. Desperate for love perhaps but not clingy… However, if we are going to argue about who is the greatest catch let me present to you, yourself; Tall, handsome, beautiful dark chocolate eyes, smooth hair, cheekbones that could cut glass, full pink very kissable lips, long slender fingers, nice soft breasts, rippling abs, strong thighs, muscular calves and hmm, something that is just distinctly yours that I just love… Anne you are literally the most perfect woman alive, and I got you.”   
“I’m not all that.” Anne muttered embarrassed but Ann kissed her sweetly,   
“You are and to top it all, you’ve got experience and knowledge that… makes you even more attractive. Do you know there is no time you are more beautiful than when you talk about science, or business or write in your journal – things that interest you and inspire passion in you. You make everyone flustered.”   
“Stop… you are making me blush. I’m not all that. I’m below average in looks and above average in intelligence but you – Ann you’re perfect.”   
“Are we really having this fight? Because I will fight anyone who dares contradict me about you, even you.” Ann told her and Anne laughed,   
“Really?”   
“Just accept my compliments, because they are true – trust me. And…” Ann was interrupted by a kiss to her lips,   
“I am so in love with you. I can’t get enough of you, your sweetness and your everything – even when you do the exact opposite of what I say.”   
“You know what I hate most about the fact that people cannot know about us?” Ann asked and Anne raised an eyebrow, lifting her head slightly from Ann’s chest,   
“No?”   
“The fact that when people insult you, I can’t punch them in the face and go ‘HEY that’s my wife you’re talking about’”   
Anne snorted out in laughter, kissing her wife whilst still laughing and Ann smiled pleased,   
“That and when you are just amazing and smart and say stuff that makes people go ‘Wow’ and I can’t say, ‘That’s my girl, that’s my wife!”   
“You know what… that’s too true. I wish I could say that every time some man approaches you, you know with attitude. Always really, I want everyone to know you’re mine. Mine. My wife. My love, the love of my life.”   
“But do you know who you can tell?” Ann smirked, and Anne frowned,   
“My aunt?”   
“I was thinking me.”   
“Oh? I love you, Ann…”   
“Not with your words.” Ann told her biting her lip and Anne growled, capturing her wives lips in a hungry, loving but unforgiving kiss that took them through a storm…


	17. Trap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Trap
> 
> A really unrealistic take on how Anne confronts the Rawson's/the Priestley's after the thug beat her up.

This was no good... and tbh if you've read this far you might've noticed that this is not a serious work nor a fantastic one... But this one shot was terrible beyond measure so I deleted it. I did however base 'Memoria Damnum' of this one shot so you might like to read that instead.   
  
[Memoria Damnum](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27608522/chapters/67543073)


	18. Dizzy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Dizzy 
> 
> Anne feels dizzy...

Marian was proving to be a bother yet again. This morning she was stood in Anne’s way lecturing about God knows what when Anne must leave to attend a meeting with Mr. Washington by the pits. Aunt Anne and Ann remained quiet during the quarrel and Jeremy, well he was silent simply because he was hard of hearing.  
“You really should start thinking of others…” Marian’s voice became foggier by the second, and Anne squinted as her surroundings began to go blurry, what on earth was Marian saying?  
Anne tried to focus her eyes on her sister but couldn’t, they travelled to Ann, but she seemed so far away, and the voices was muffled like she was under water. Her head started reeling,  
“Anne are you alright?” Ann asked suddenly interfering in Marian’s on-going lecture. The brunette frowned as she could hardly hear nor see,  
“I’m fine, I’m always…” Anne put her hand to her head, the dizzy spell didn’t waver, the room started spinning around and suddenly she felt herself moving – she was falling to the ground and for a few seconds everything went black.  
“Anne, look at me.” Ann’s voice called from a distant and Anne’s eyelids fluttered as she tried to regain her vision. Soon the contours became clearer and she could see Ann kneeling beside her and her sister who stood on the other side, and her aunt who looked quite worried from where she was sat. Anne tried sitting up, but Ann pushed her back,  
“Just lie still for me for a few seconds, Anne. You’re dizzy.”  
“It’s fine now, it was just that one- I’m fine, really. I’m late for my meeting with Mr. Washington.” Anne tried, pulling a hand over her face to stop the pounding in her head. Ann’s wrist felt her forehead and she frowned,  
“You’re burning up, Anne. I’ll send a note for Mr. Washington explaining that you’ve come down with something.”  
“I’m fine.” Anne protested and Ann glared at her,  
“You’re not fine, and I am ordering you to stay put.”  
Anne rolled her eyes at Ann but stayed put, nonetheless.  
“Can I get up now?”  
“Are you still dizzy?”  
“Well, yes but it’s better, the room isn’t spinning any longer – it was Marian’s excessively boring lesson that drove me mad.” Anne muttered and Marian were about to protest but hadn’t time because the blonde gave her a look,  
“Anne, I want you to take hold of my arm, and I’ll help you upstairs.”  
“I don’t need any help.”  
“We’ll see about that.” Ann muttered, before lending her hand to Anne who reluctantly took it, not wanting to be helped. As soon as she stood, the room started spinning again and Ann placed her arm around her waist to secure her.  
“Slowly, Anne.” Ann reprimanded as she carefully led the brunette upstairs. They made it into the bedroom and Anne stopped suddenly, looking a bit green, Ann glanced up at her worriedly,  
“Do you need something to throw up in?”  
“No.” Anne replied with her lips tightly shut, as she seemed to swallow whatever had risen in her throat. Ann made small comforting circles on the small of her back before helping her to bed.  
“Sit down, Anne, you’re going to faint again if you don’t.” Ann told her softly and the brunette seemed a little insulted at that,  
“I didn’t faint, I fell over because I almost died of boredom at Marian’s natter.”  
“Anne.” Ann said running her hand over the woman’s cheek,  
“Fine. Maybe I fainted a little – but if you ever tell anyone about that…”  
“Anne, are you threatening me?” Ann raised an eyebrow, “Because that’s the last thing you want to be doing right now.”  
Anne bit down her tongue and glared at Ann, she was not one to be babied and she was not one to get ill either.  
“I’m fine – can I go?”  
“You’re not fine, you are burning up with fever, you’re cold sweating and you just fainted. If you move an inch from that bed Lister – you will have no wife by the morning.” Ann scolded her tutting her index finger at the brunette whose eyes widened,  
“You’re not serious?!”  
“Dare to test me, Lister. It’ll make us both very unhappy.” Ann gave her a warning look and the older woman sighed defeated on bed.  
“Fine, but you’ll stay here with me? Do not send Marian to take care of me.”  
“Through sickness and health, remember?” Ann smirked and finally Anne smiled again,  
“Yes. Good. Excellent.”  
“I’ll help you with this.” Ann kneeled before the brunette and Anne smirked down at her,  
“Really?”  
“Don’t even think it, Lister – it won’t serve you any good.”  
“I like it when you scold me and call me Lister.” Anne wiggled her eyebrows, winking at her and Ann rolled her eyes at her before working on unhooking the shoes and placing them on the floor. Warm, gentle fingers ran up the brunette’s legs and she gasped softly, and Ann raised an eyebrow at her,  
“What? Oh, I can’t help it – it tickles!” Anne defended herself and Ann just shook her head at her laughing before rolling down the left sock and then the right one putting them with the shoes.  
“I can undress myself.” Anne said humorously and Ann looked disbelievingly at her,  
“So you can leg it and go to that meeting anyways? I don’t think so – you’re staying put young lady.”  
“Young lady? Why, I haven’t been called that in ages.”  
“When you start acting your age, I might stop calling you that.” Ann retorted and Anne chuckled quietly as the blonde threw her cravat to the ground and started working her way down Anne’s waistcoat.  
“You know you look incredibly handsome in green?” Ann told her as she undid the green striped waistcoat,  
“I do?” Anne mused, and her wife nodded,  
“Yes. But most of all like this – with it open and your sleeves rolled up.” Ann smirked, “I’ve painted you like that when you helped on the land.”  
“You have?” Anne asked amused, and Ann nodded,  
“Yes.”  
“Can I see?”  
“No.”  
“Why not?” Anne pouted and soft lips pressed against hers,  
“Because you are very judgemental.”  
“To you? Never.”  
“Well then that’s just not being honest with me.” Ann replied smiling, kissing her wife again,  
“I am – and I have told you that your painting is admirable. Can’t I see it?”  
“Maybe – if you are a really good patient till I deem you well again.”  
“Can’t we say if I’m an alright patient? You know me – I’m not good at being idle.” Anne bargained and Ann laughed,  
“Fine – if you are alright and haven’t fallen down any stairs trying to escape your bed, then yes you can see them.”  
Ann pushed her waistcoat over her shoulders and it joined the growing heap on the floor, Ann’s fingers ran over the curves of Anne’s body and stopped at her hipbone where she unfastened the black skirt and pulled it down the length of her wives long legs, discarding it with the rest of the clothes.  
“Why am I the only one getting undressed?” Anne asked suddenly and Ann’s eyes fluttered upwards,  
“Because you’re ill and need to rest. Stop trying to… I won’t do it.”  
“That’s a bummer. I have the whole day off.” Anne tried, flashing a set of white teeth and Ann shook her head,  
“You don’t have the day off – you’re ill! You need to rest and get better.”  
“But I have read that it can speed recovery…”  
“Oh have you really? Now that’s very convenient for you Lister. I tell you what – I’ll make you a deal.” Ann began and Anne nodded,  
“I’m listening.”  
“This is up to you - either I’ll give in and we’ll do it.”  
“I choose that.” Anne interrupted but Ann silenced her with a hand,  
“Yes, but then I’ll never do it ever again. Or you wait until you’re better and I’ll make it up to you and make it worth the wait.”  
“Fuck.” Anne frowned,  
“Language.”  
“’M sorry, I forgot that there were sensitive ladies present.”  
“Fuck off.” Ann muttered before kneeling down and unfastening Anne’s drawers,  
“This is not as exciting when I know you will just force me to rest.” Anne told her and Ann laughed,  
“Good.”  
The drawers joined the other items on the floor and then the shirt. Anne sat wearing only her corset and chemise.  
“Would you please release me from my prison?” Anne asked her and Ann chuckled,  
“Way to be dramatic, Lister. That is not a prison – that’s a life saver if strung right, you couldn’t run a foot without it unless you want to hold it up yourself.”  
“Excellent thinking… yes, I suppose I couldn’t. I mean it would look rather vulgar running about with ones hands cupping the ol’ kettle drums to not be caused any pain.”  
“Kettle drums?” Ann laughed, and Anne with her,  
“That’s what they used to call them, the boys when I was younger. They’d shout it after me. Christopher used to say it – and every time I’d be close to murdering him.”  
“God… that’s an awful name.”  
“Yes, it is – vulgar which suited my sentence admirably. But yes, my breasts.”  
“I’d hold them up for you.” Ann smirked and Anne gasped,  
“Did you just say that? You didn’t just think it – those words came out of your mouth!”  
“Don’t act so innocent, Anne!” Ann laughed, and her wife tugged at her hand and pulled her down for a kiss,  
“You are adorable.”  
“I know. Now I’ll sit behind you.” Ann climbed into bed and kneeled behind Anne to undo her stays and her corset.  
“Farewell oh good support.” Anne sighed dramatically making the blonde laugh again which was her intent precisely.  
The corset and stays joined the clothes and Anne were now sat in her chemise with her arms crossed over her chest.  
“I’ll fetch you your nightgown.” Ann told her, jumping off bed and getting the thing before pulling it over Anne’s head and down the length of her body after having discarded the chemise.  
“Lie back.” Ann commanded, and Anne swung her legs up and lay back against the propped-up pillows and Ann tucked her in, removing the pins from the brunette’s hair and it cascaded down her shoulders.  
“Sit with me.” Anne begged and Ann sat down on the side of the bed, brushing brown hairs from Anne’s face before pressing her lips against her forehead to check the temperature.  
“You’re really hot, Anne – how are you feeling? Tell me truth.”  
“Cold, my head is pounding and if I move to quick the world starts spinning.”  
“Do you want me to call for the doctor?” Ann asked worriedly, and Anne took hold of her hand, placing a kiss over her knuckles,  
“No. I’m fine for now. But you could join me – to keep me warm.”  
Ann smiled at her, leaning down and capturing her full lips with hers,  
“My pleasure.”  
Ann took her dress off, and all things in the way before climbing into bed and taking her wife in her arms. Anne rested her head in the crook of her neck, her arms circled around her waist and her leg draped across her body. Ann raised the covers over them and then focused solely on comforting and warming her wife up. She knew Anne was way worse than she would admit. But she didn’t want to pick a fight – so she merely ran her nails across her back and arms, placing feather light kisses over her hair, making sure she got rest. It was of course nice being together like this but also not. Anne was burning up but feeling cold, drenched in cold-sweat after a couple of hours and Ann was sweating from being so warm but she wouldn’t leave her wife when she needed her – she could stand it for now. And it wasn’t all bad, having Anne wrapped around her, needing her – was nice and the occasional kisses pressed to her throat and chin – it was worth it.  
“Thank you.” Anne murmured into her neck, and Ann stopped her hands running over her back for a second before continuing,  
“For what?”  
“For being here with me – I know I’m a bother.”  
“It’s no bother. I’ll happily stay here all day.” Ann told her, kissing her still hot forehead,  
“I love you – you know, that right?”  
“Yes, and I love you too even when you are a stubborn ass.”  
“An ass, Christ, thanks!”  
Ann smirked at her and kissed her nose.  
“You’re making me dizzy.” Anne smiled, “You have since that day – when I turned around and saw you standing there.”


	19. Breakable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Breakable
> 
> Ann breaks a paper weight...

Ann had snuck into Anne’s study, or well she hadn’t really snuck in, because she was allowed there but somehow, when Anne wasn’t around it felt wrong. As if she was doing something she wasn’t supposed too. Ann stopped mid-room, thinking with her fingers tapping her chin, what had she come in here to do?  
“Right, the sketchpad!” Ann raised a finger in the air, as if she had just gotten a new idea, and hurried to the desk to locate it. She had sat with Anne the evening before whilst she looked over a few papers and then forgotten to take it with her as they left for bed. Ann found it, she could see the pencil sketches from where she stood – they were all of Anne, Anne working on her papers. The brunette was unaware of course – she always got so stiff and unnatural when she knew she was being sketched so Ann always did so in secret – sometimes when she was asleep, because she wanted to capture the relaxed features of her face and keep for always. Ann could draw the brunette all day, every day, and never tire of it. Anne was so remarkably handsome, and Ann thought to herself, the most perfect woman on earth – she was a joy to paint – as long as she was unaware. Ann bent over to grab her sketchpad but accidentally knocked a paper weight over and Ann dropped her sketchpad trying to catch the thing but failing miserably, watching as it shattered into a million pieces on the wooden floor. Ann gasped, and then bit her lip,  
“Oh crikey. I hope that wasn’t precious. Breathe, Ann – it’s not the whole world- she won’t kill you- oh Christ, I can replace it… unless it’s from Paris… can one make it to there and back in less than… uh, maybe two hours…”  
Marian pushed the door open,  
“Are you alright? I heard a crash.”  
“I’m not sure…” Ann turned around, hands still open as if to catch the thing, and Marian looked at the floor, raising an eyebrow,  
“I see… you knocked over her paper weight.”  
“Do you know if it was valuable to her? It’s not your uncle’s old paper weight? Oh no if It is, I shall never forgive myself. She will never forgive me!” Ann was panicking, and Marian shook her head,  
“No, it’s not – I think she was gifted it by a friend one Christmas or so.”  
“Oh, no, Marian, not a friend… urgh – I ruined it!”  
“By accident, now calm down Ann. She won’t be angry with you. If it were me, I’d flee the country but you never.” Marian said it to be funny, because she didn’t think Anne would be angry, but Ann’s eyes widened, and she put her hands to her face,  
“Oh, no… She will hate me. God, I’m such an idiot. I shouldn’t have gone in here on my own.”  
“Ann… breathe! Chances are she won’t even notice.” Marian were interrupted,  
“Won’t notice what?” Anne came inside the room, but no one need say anything because her eyes immediately found the floor and an eyebrow quirked, but Ann grimaced, beet red in the face, on the verge of tears,  
“I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to; I was picking my sketch pad up and I knocked it over – I’ll replace it – if I can but I don’t know… I know anything I replaced it with wouldn’t have the same sentimental value – God I’m so sorry, Anne!”  
Anne looked at the blonde and then down at the floor again, her lips twitching, and Ann were afraid she might start shouting or worse crying because it had been such a precious thing to her. But then suddenly all that was heard was a snort and immediately afterwards laughter following it. Ann was stunned to silence, because she thought Anne would be mad, but it seemed she wasn’t and Marian left, closing the door behind her rolling her eyes at her sister, muttering something about important things to do. Ann however was confused but Anne trod over the shattered glass and cupped her cheek with her hand, still laughing,  
“Ann, don’t look so frightened. It’s fine.”  
“So, it’s not precious to you?”  
“Not too precious no.” Anne smirked, her thumb caressing Ann’s cheekbone tenderly.  
“It’s not irreplaceable?” Ann asked quietly and Anne shook her head,  
“It’s fine. Things break. I’m just glad you’re alright. You are, right? No shattered glass in your hands or…?”  
“No, I’m fine. I just… I was afraid I might have ruined something valuable to you.”  
“Nothing, Ann, and I’d like you to remember it, so you needn’t look so frightened in the future, nothing is more valuable to me than you. Nothing. Truly the only thing that hurts me is that you seemed scared of me, I don’t want that.” Anne ran her thumb over Ann’s bottom lip, looking at it and then glancing up into her blue wide eyes,  
“I’m sorry. I, I panicked is all. Because it felt as though I shouldn’t be in here.”  
“Everything mine is yours, Ann. That paper weight was going to be thrown away in any case – I didn’t like it. It was a gift from… hm, someone. Now, how can I make you feel as though you are allowed in here?” Anne smiled down at her and Ann blushed prettily,  
“Kiss me.”  
“Really? Will that help?”  
“I don’t know, but I want you to kiss me now because I haven’t seen you all day.”  
“Alright then if I must…” Anne grinned against her lips, rubbing their noses together before giving in and kissing the blonde sweetly, and she responded eagerly to the kiss.  
“Wait…” Anne backed them into the door, and she turned the key before smiling,  
“Carry on.”


	20. Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sleep
> 
> Anne tries to sneak in... it doesn't go according to plan.

It was late one night, and Anne was going to sneak up to bed were her wife lay waiting for her or maybe already were asleep. She had come home late and missed dinner and tried to be as quiet as humanly possible to not alert anyone else in the house. It had all gone according to plan – no one had heard her come in and she was hoping to keep it that way so Marian wouldn’t arise from her slumber to give her a beratement. Argus had been in the way – as usual, but she had managed to creep past the dog without him ruining her plan.   
She was now stood on the landing, outside Ann’s bedroom, in which she hardly ever slept, only occasionally when Anne hadn’t been home when they retired. Because it would look rather odd if Ann went into the brunette’s room instead. All though, Anne suspected they were all more or less aware of their arrangement. Just as she placed her hand on the doorknob to twist it, she heard someone behind her,  
“Why are you sneaking into Ann’s room in the middle of the night?”   
Anne turned around startled and was faced with her sister who stood in her favourite pose; hands on hips and her eyebrow quirked.   
“Eh, Ann’s room? Oh, I promised to pop in when I came home so she knew I arrived back safely… and to eh, tell her a story.” Anne lied quickly cursing herself for telling the worst lie she had ever told. Marian didn’t look convinced but then she smirked,   
“Oh really? You expect me to believe that Ann, a woman of one and thirty needs a bedtime story?”   
“Well Ann struggles to sleep, you know that, and likes to have someone talk her to sleep.”   
“Then you are the right woman for the job, talking someone to sleep I mean.”   
“I thought to ask you, but I didn’t want her to die of boredom the poor thing.” Anne retorted and Marian rolled her eyes, before giving a reply,   
“Then you won’t mind if I come with you and listen. I’m sure Ann wouldn’t mind. Unless there is something, you’re not telling me.”   
“Hm no of course not. You can join in.”   
“Open the door then.”   
“Mm.” Anne bit her tongue as she turned to the open the door – she had no idea how she was going to manage situations now. Hopefully as elegant as she usually skipped between her scrapes. Ann sat up at the sound and seemed intent to leap out of bed to greet the brunette when she saw Marian with her and drew the covers back over herself.   
“I’m back.” Anne smiled, “And here to tell you that bedtime story you wanted.”   
“The wha… oh yes that!” Ann smoothed over her own confusion quickly when she saw Anne’s look. Anne sat down on the bed, wringing her hands nervously, trying to conjure a story in her mind to tell.   
“Have I told you the story of… of”   
“Of what?” Marian was enjoying this tormenting far too much and Anne glared at her sister before turning back to the blonde,   
“of Ann…”   
“Ann?! This sounds completely made up on the spot.” Marian cried in disbelief almost laughing and Anne gave her a sharp look,   
“Would I be calling the protagonist Ann if it were made up? Please, Marian, I’m no idiot.”   
“I want to hear this story about Ann is it with an e?” Ann asked amused and Anne gave her a look,   
“No, it just so happens that this Ann has lost her e. Now she lived in a big old house by herself.”   
“By herself, in a big old house? Named Ann? I think I know her.” Marian teased and Anne glared at her sister,   
“Don’t interrupt. Anyway, she… close your eyes Ann or you won’t fall asleep.”  
“Trust me, I want to hear this story.” Ann smirked and Anne sighed,  
“She walked the empty halls of the manor one night and it was like the walls were speaking to her. Then appeared at the end of the hallway a beastly thing, a ghost of a horrendous woman that had lived in the house centuries past. She kept repeating words of doom, of eternal flames.”   
“Is the story meant to put me to sleep or to frighten me to death?” Ann asked with her arms crossed and Anne realised, a story of a woman named Ann hearing voices might not have been the best thing she had thought up.   
“Um, no, it was fine because then Ann woke up in her bed, it had all been a dream. Yet she couldn’t shake the feeling off, but she was in luck her friend came over.”   
“Let me guess, her name was Ann, Ann with an e.” Marian interrupted, and Anne exhaled,   
“No, in fact her name was Anna – you cannot make these stories up, Marian!”   
“And they were close friends?”   
“Yes, in fact Ann was going to be swept off on her greatest adventure yet…”   
“This is so obviously a story you made up just now on the basis of you and Ann. Now, I’m going to bed, so I don’t have to witness this poor attempt at storytelling. I tell you what Anne, if you journal as bad as you tell stories – then thank God no one shall ever read them, they will certainly never make any theatrical production on your life, if told by yourself.” Marian stood up, then she yawned before making her way out the room,  
“Good night.”   
“Night.” Anne replied craning her neck to see that Marian shut the door completely before leaning down to kiss her wife.  
“I’m so sorry, she saw me about to sneak in and I had to lie.”   
“You know Marian knows right?”   
“Uh…”   
“This was completely unnecessary. You are way too dramatic for your own good.” Ann chuckled kindly and Anne shook her head at her before kissing her again.   
“Where you asleep?”   
“No, I was waiting for you. You know I can hardly sleep without you.”   
“I’ll just call for Eugenie and get undressed and I will be back shortly.” Anne smiled and Ann stopped her with her hand.  
“I’ll come to you. Your bed is much comfier anyway, I sleep better there.”  
“Good. I’ll prepare for bed and then you’ll join me.” Anne leant forwards to capture her lips in a chaste kiss before standing up to do what she had just said. All though there wasn’t much sleep to be had when it came to that… *insert Anne’s eyebrow thingy that she does for the camera*


	21. Ride

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ride
> 
> Anne stumbles upon her young rival and gets herself into a scrape...

It was a good a thing that she was fast on her legs, Anne thought as she ran over the fields that would eventually take her to Shibden. She was fairly certain Mr. Pinewood was still running after her but she daren’t turn around to have a look because that would definitely slow her down or make her stumble over something. In hindsight, Anne didn’t really know why she had felt compelled to do it, but there was no going back now – she had already done it.   
The day had started good though, Anne had set off, after her first study session beginning at 5am and ending at 8am, on a walk – thinking to herself that she wasn’t going to cause her aunt and uncle any trouble that day. To be fair, Anne hardly did seek trouble, it just found her. People picking on her looks, people saying stuff and she would occasionally lash out on them verbally and physically. Once when Zacharias Smith had been an unusual pain in the back and then asked her ‘What are you going to do about it? Punch me?’ she had done just that and managed to break his nose. But today she was not going to give in to their words and ill-manners. She would be minding her own business, and it had all gone well until she came across Christopher Rawson, Zacharias Smith and Robert Guildford. They had been shouting slurs at her from the moment they saw her until she passed. But Anne had pretended not to hear them, or at least she didn’t acknowledge them. It had annoyed the boys, or men rather, only they were just twenty and not worth calling that, Anne thought. She was more of a lady at eighteen than they were men at twenty. Christopher Rawson whistled as she walked past them,   
“Oi, Hedge whore – nice kettle drums!”   
Anne dug her heels in the gravel, and clenched her fists, no one, especially not a man, and no way in hell was Christopher Rawson going to get away with calling her a lowly beggar of a whore and, AND ‘complimenting’ her breasts.   
“What did you say!?” Anne’s face was beet red, and she moved closer to him and he laughed,   
“I said, nice kettle drums and I’ve got to say the view from here is even better.”   
“If you say another word like that again, I will make your nose match poor Zac! Understood?”  
“Christ, relax Anne. Can’t a fellow joke with you ladies without you going ballistic? And you of all people – mannish as you are.” Christopher eyed her up and down, his eyes lingering too long on her midpart. Anne gave him a harsh nudge with her hands to his chest,   
“You know nothing about me, Christopher. You will shut up, or I will resort to other more demeaning methods.”   
“Like what? Braiding my hair?” Christopher mocked and the boys laughed with him and Anne fought the urge to roll her eyes because one second they would make laugh at her breasts, next they would call her mannish or a man or whatever and in the next breath then belittle her as a woman again. There was really no consistency in their insults which made them even more annoying, and to be frank dumb.   
“I was thinking more in the lines of using my newly sharpened knife to make sure no more idiots are born.” Anne smirked and Christopher stopped laughing and became a little green.   
“You wouldn’t.”   
“Mm, maybe, maybe not. Anatomy and biology; I have always found fascinating. I’m sure it wouldn’t be too painful… for me.” Anne shrugged a shoulder and eyed him sharply,   
“It was a joke, Anne.” Zacharias persisted and Anne glanced at him smiling,   
“Of course, lads, and as usual your reptile brain makes you no funnier than a chimp. But anyhow, what are you doing here of all places?”   
If they were insulted, they showed it little, or maybe they didn’t understand the insult for instead they softened their stances towards her,   
“We were planning on maybe taking a few apples from Mr. Pinewood. But then we saw his new black stallion and opted to a challenge. Whoever rides that beast for more than five seconds gets five shillings from Christopher, or if he wins from us each.” Robert told Anne, proud of their little game. Anne merely looked were he pointed and saw a huge black stallion in the meadow and raised an eyebrow in awe of the horse.   
“And Mr. Pinewood knows about this?” Anne asked, and Christopher scoffed,   
“What he doesn’t know, doesn’t hurt him.”   
“Have anyone had a go yet?”   
“No. We were just about to when you came Jac… jacking around the corner.”   
Anne almost rolled her eyes again, because Christopher had nearly called her ‘Jack’, she knew that’s what they, the whole neighbourhood, called her behind her back – Gentleman Jack. She ignored the bile that rose in her throat at the thoughts coming unbidden inside her head of her oddity and all that.   
“I’m in.”   
“You can't.” Zacharias protested and Anne crossed her arms, insulted,   
“And why ever not?”   
“Because you’re a woman, and it’s a man’s game.” Robert insisted, and Anne scoffed,  
“So you all spread rumours about me, call me mannish and a man but then will exclude me on the grounds that I’m a woman when it suits you? Is it because you’re scared? Scared of losing to one of the gentler sex?” Anne tilted her head patronising and the boys all puffed out their chests at that,  
“What? We’re not!” Zacharias cried, his nostrils flaring, making him look ridiculous rather than intimidating and confident.   
“So, I can join in?”   
“Fine. But if you break a nail and cry about it, Lister – you’re a never coming back!” Christopher fumed,   
“Don’t worry your pretty little head about my nails, Christopher- they are well groomed.”   
“What?” Zacharias looked incredibly confused and Christopher looked at him and then at Anne slyly,   
“Miss Lister likes the ladies she does.”   
“Yeah, well your sister didn’t complain last night.” Anne retorted dryly and the two other boys burst out in ‘Ooooh’s’ at the joke, no one took it seriously – and it wasn’t. Anne would never look twice at his sister, she was too stiff and looked like Christopher with a wig so, Anne shuddered inwardly – NEVER.   
“Enough of this. I’ll go first.” Christopher pushed past Zacharias and Robert in large strides towards the horse. He balanced on the stone wall and managed to get up, making the beast absolutely furious and Christopher was thrown off – head-first, before he had time to shout ‘Hey’. Anne laughed with the other two boys at the mud caking his face, and he walked towards them – red in the face, and angry as could be,   
“You’ll not laugh after you had a go! Mark my words.”   
“We will see about that.” Zacharias replied merrily and went to have a go himself. He was seated for four seconds before gliding off as the stallion rose on his hindlegs. He was however gleeful because he lasted longer than Christopher.   
“Your turn, Rob.”   
“I won’t…” Robert mumbled, being a bit overweight and probably wary that the horse would beckon or something else embarrassing, or maybe he just couldn’t get up.  
“My turn then.” Anne threw a daring look at the men and they laughed at her,  
“Rob, if you’re not having a go, maybe you can go get the reverend. We might need to bury Lister after this.” Christopher wheezed and Anne slapped him over the head having him winch in pain,   
“Shut up and watch how it’s really done. Hold my morals will you, Robert.”  
Anne advanced towards the black stallion with determined strides. She gave him a pat down the nose, speaking softly to him, so soft that her fellow friends didn’t hear, nor did they see her talking to the stallion at all with her back to them.  
“Hello there. What a beautiful boy you are. I’m going to sit on you now.”   
Anne stroke the stallion over the slender neck weighing him down with her hands to warn him before running towards him taking a leap up his back. He startled when he felt her on him, but she pinched him over the mane, just as mares does their foals to calm them down. The stallion didn’t calm much but bucked around the meadow. But Anne kept her legs securely wrapped around him, keeping her balance by holding his mane. The boy’s mouths had dropped when she was still seated after twenty seconds. Anne smiled at them as she had gotten the horse to stand still and graze, but then saw their expressions change rapidly, and wondered why. But when she turned her head, she saw Mr. Pinewood and she gulped quietly and swung herself down, before running towards the boys.   
“I won! I think you have something for me, Rawson.” Anne smirked, and Christopher handed her the money reluctantly, muttering all the while and keeping a watchful eye on Mr. Pinewood who was running towards them shouting. Anne accepted the five shillings and put them inside her pockets.  
“Okay… lads, I’m off!” Anne told them before setting off in a quick run.   
  
That’s why she was running at full speed over the fields back to Shibden. She knew she shouldn’t have done it but here she was as concluded. Anne could taste blood in her mouth by the time she reached Shibden and she ran in, slamming the door behind her – probably startling the whole house. Her aunt and uncle looked up from their place by the fire where they were having their tea.   
“Anne? What on earth are you running from?” Uncle James asked her seriously,   
“Slamming doors like that!” Aunt Anne reprimanded and Anne panted heavily, smiling half-heartened,  
“I have good news… and bad news, which do you want to hear first?”   
Her uncle merely stared as did her aunt but at least Aunt Anne finally cleared her throat, setting her teacup down,   
“The good news?”   
“It is very unlikely that I will ever, EVER, do it again.”   
“Do what exactly, young lady?” Uncle James asked her with a frown, but Anne hadn’t time to reply for there was a knock on the door and Anne gulped,   
“Um, I am dead if anyone asks.”   
“What have you done, child?” Aunt Anne asked her, and Anne tried smiling,   
“I might have left my morals with Robert Guildford a...”   
“You did WHAT?!” Uncle James bellowed as he heard his niece, and Anne turned on her heals, startled, her heart beating hard in her chest – worried that they might whip her or worse throw her out.  
“Hm? I left my morals with Robert Guildford bu…”  
“Anne Elizabeth Lister, if you are pregnant with that boy when the month is at end I will… I will – You will NEVER leave your room again!” Uncle James boomed; the door quite forgotten. Anne’s mouth dropped to the floor, before inhaling sharply to be able to shout at the top of her lungs;  
“Pregnant? You think… Oh, you think I did… with Robert? I mean… THE AUDACITY of that. I can solemnly swear that I will never, NEVER do that with him or any other man as long as I live, and I’m hurt that you think that of me!”   
Aunt Anne just looked between the two, and before James could say something ill-fitting, she gave him a sharp look,   
“Brother, do not ever suggest that Anne would be immoral with a boy again.”   
“Do you rather I’d suggest she was immoral with a woman?” James argued and Aunt Anne glared at him, her mouth a thin line,   
“Well it would be closer to the mark.”   
Uncle James features softened, and he glanced at Anne who was still staring at him, wide-eyed and teary and he sighed,   
“Right. I know... Now, who is behind that door banging?”   
“Mr. Pinewood.” Anne replied, and her Uncle raised an eyebrow,  
“What on earth did you do to poor Mr. Pinewood?”   
“I might have ridden his stallion without permission.”   
“You did what?” Aunt Anne cried horrified, she worried Anne would hurt herself,   
“I… won five shillings.” Anne mumbled and Uncle James laughed out loud,  
“You won five shillings? From whom?!”   
“Christopher Rawson.”   
“This is why… this is the exact reason why I love you and why you’re my…!”   
“James, do not encourage Anne to vex the Rawson’s it will only mean more trouble from them, they have no morals – vulgar people, especially the mother.”   
“Of course not.” Uncle James said seriously but then winked at Anne who smirked before he turned and left to open the door by which their footman stood waiting as he had been given a look not to open it.   
“Mr. Pinewood, to what do I owe the pleasure?”   
“Your niece, Lister – rode my horse without permission!”   
“My niece? You mean to tell me that my well-behaved niece, a perfect lady – accomplished as no other – rode a horse – a stallion without permission?” Uncle James was acting out a Shakespeare drama by the sounds of it and Anne had a hard time keeping from laughter, hiding her face behind her book of Greek whilst her aunt gave her serious looks and stares.   
“I saw her with my own eyes!” Mr. Pinewood yelled distraught,  
“Hm… as far as I’m concerned, our Anne has been studying all morning.” Uncle James lied through his teeth, and Mr. Pinewood were fuming, and Anne decided that she didn’t like her uncle lying for her, so she stood up and went into the hallway.  
“A-ha there she is!”   
“Mr. Pinewood, I’m terribly sorry if it upset you that I sat on your stallion without permission… you see I was climbing the tree next to it and slipped on a branch and your horse happened to break my fall. I ran because I was afraid you wouldn’t believe me and try to do something to me.” Anne said feigning innocence and she could’ve sworn she heard her uncle scoff under his breath and her aunt wheeze in the sitting room. However, after a small while Mr. Pinewood nodded growling,  
“That’s alright I suppose, Miss Lister. But next time don’t climb the trees by that meadow.”  
“I will take care not to, Sir.”   
“It’s really no ladies business to climb trees, you keep to embroidery and all will be well.” Mr. Pinewood said and Anne’s eyes widened as she fought every impulse she had, but Uncle James merely nodded, and the man excused himself and left. Anne and Uncle James went back into the sitting room, and Aunt Anne looked up and shook her head at them,  
“I just prevented murder.” Anne muttered, her fists clutched tightly,  
“You did what?! How?!” Aunt Anne cried as Uncle James burst out laughing,   
“Self-control I imagine sister dear.”   
Uncle James patted Anne’s shoulder and they looked at each other only to laugh again,   
“You two are impossible!”   
“Thank you! - Now Anne… try to stay out of any more scrapes… today.”   
“Fine. I was going to study anyways.” Anne shrugged her shoulders,   
“What?”   
“Science, there is this really interesting article I found this morning that I haven’t finished.”   
“Come sit with me and I’ll study with you – I didn’t go to Cambridge for naught.” Uncle James smiled and Anne gladly went with him leaving her aunt alone.  
“Well, well, just me, myself, and I – talking to myself – but I suppose one has got to have intelligent conversation at some point of the day.” **  
**


	22. RIP

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: RIP 
> 
> Anne rushes to her Uncle's side as he lies before death.

Anne was travelling home at record speed, and for her the high-flyer coach from York was going much too slow. She must have cursed under her breath fifty or so times because another pair travelling with had asked the driver to slow down because the lady was getting sick.  
Well if one is travelsick one should stay home, Anne had thought annoyed as she flicked her pocket-watch open for the hundredth time. She might be too late. What if she was? Then she would never hear his voice in this lifetime. Tears prickled her eyes and she willed them away, trying to think optimistically about the whole thing, after all – Marian always tended to be overdramatic in her letters to make Anne feel worse about going away. She wished her aunt had written her instead, wished to see a tidy line from her uncle that had always been included in those letters, but he was too poorly to write and her aunt, bless her, probably devastated.  
They neared Halifax and Anne looked around herself, it would be quicker if she walked from here, she stood up, and a gentleman looked at her with a raised eyebrow,  
“Madam sit down again, or you’ll get yourself thrown off.”  
“Excellent, it’s just what I had in mind.” Anne replied him and stood her foot on the side of the moving carriage,  
“Your luggage madam!”  
“Mm, I have a man who’ll take it in Halifax. It’s all been lovely, but I have to scurry.” Anne looked at the man with defiance as he reached out to grab her skirt to keep her in the carriage, but she leapt off before he could and it was perhaps a little higher than she had anticipated for she landed with one knee to the ground, definitely bruising it but no time to weep; Anne walked in quick strides over the well-known fields and breathed in the air; ‘home’.  
  
Suddenly as she began to see Shibden in the distance more clearly, she felt shoots of pain to her heart, it might well be the last time she got to stay there in a lifetime. Her uncle, if he died, or if he had already passed would have left the estate to someone and Anne was certain it wasn’t her father, and her other uncle and her brothers were long since passed. Blasted, traitorous tears welled up in her eyes again and she tried to force them away, tried to swallow the lump in her throat.  
“You are a grown woman, this is life… he wasn’t going to live forever.” Anne told herself in what began as a firm voice but ended in a strained teary sort of whimper. One tear leaked down her cheek and she wiped it away harshly before breaking into a run – she wasn’t going to be late this time. Every shadow she saw seemed to be death lurking and she ran faster, as fast as she possibly could, trying to make it easier by clutching to her skirt so she wouldn’t trip and tumble down the hill. She hadn’t time to stop, but the door did stop her with a thud, her hands flew up, softening the sudden stop. Anne burst through the door and without a word to her sister, who was waiting for her, probably to say something stupid, she ran up the stairs to her uncle’s room.  
“Anne!” Aunt Anne stood up from the bedside, where she had tended to her brother, Anne kissed her cheek as she embraced her quickly, panting,   
“Aunt, how is he?”  
“Not well, he is in and out of consciousness. He still talks though but the doctor reckons he hasn’t long. They have called for the reverend.”  
Again, Anne found herself fighting back tears, because it felt so final. She went past her aunt and sat in her place on the bedside, taking her uncle’s hand that seemed colder than ever before – even colder than during the winters long gone when they had had snowball fights. Her aunt left them alone, knowing her niece needed to be alone with him.  
He, who had been more of a father figure than her own, who had encouraged her to be who she was, who had taught her everything and given her every opportunity that were his to give, who had happily paid for her travels, education and whatever she had asked for with joy - he was now a mere shell of the man he had once been, and it had gone so fast. Uncle James had been fine when she had left, a little tired perhaps but fine, he had assured her as much. Looking at him now, pale and thin, Anne fought back tears and thought bitterly that she should have never gone. She should have been here, helped him and sat with him from the start, he deserved as much. They could have had more moments together, but she had been selfish and left to have her own adventures. Leaving behind her aunt and uncle who had given her everything. Anne remembered how he would take her with him wherever he went, he never excluded her because of her sex. He valued her opinion and challenged her mind with science, literature and history, and Anne repaid him with leaving, and now maybe the chance to say goodbye was forever lost on her, because she hadn’t been brave enough to stay put. Hadn’t wanted to believe that he could die, had clung to the hope that he would’ve been the same when she came back. Anne stroke his hand softly, thinking of all the times those hands had held hers, she kissed them gently,  
“I’m here now, Uncle, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left but... you told me that you were okay! You promised!” Anne’s voice broke at the end of her sentence, the lump burning in her throat, tears on the verge of leaking from her eyes.  
“You idiot. You should’ve told me, why did you let me go?!” Anne was upset, naturally, he was slipping away from her before her very eyes, and he had said he was fine, but according to the letter, he had known for a long time.  
“Why did you lie to me? I could’ve helped you. Don’t you dare leave me!” Anne couldn’t keep the tears at bay any longer as a sob escaped her, and she leant her head down carefully on his still heaving chest. A hand ran over her hair slowly, and Anne lifted her head and was met with her uncle’s dark eyes,  
“Hush, Anne…” His voice was weak, and Anne touched his cheek,  
“Don’t leave me. Please!”  
“I’m afraid I can’t stop it. But you… my dear child, will do fine without me.” Uncle James told her strained and Anne wanted to stop him talking, it seemed to be draining so much energy from his already weak body but at the same time she never wanted him to stop because if he did, she was certain the breath would escape him too.   
“I love you, please stay with us, you’ll get better!” Anne tried desperately and he touched her cheek, slowly stroking her tears away with his thumb, Anne touched his hand with hers, leaning into his warm palm before removing it gently thinking he hadn’t the strength to keep his arm up like that.   
“I am not afraid, I know paradise awaits, even as we speak, I feel His presence. Don’t cry, dear. I have all good faith in you that you will do well. It’s all yours.”  
“All mine?” Was all Anne could say because what did one say to the other things, Anne sensed a weird feeling in the room but that might all be in her head.  
“Yours, Shibden, it’s yours. I left it to you. Care for it, and Aunt Anne, will you?”  
“Mine? No, no - not yet because you will get better!” Anne persisted, her heart too full at the moment to even comprehend her uncle leaving the estate to her and not some distant male relative. Her uncle kissed her hand, but he seemed weaker than a second ago, his breath shallower,  
“I love you, and have loved you dear as my own child – never forget that. No matter what, that you are loved – always!”  
More tears rained down her cheeks, and her uncle’s eyes seemed wet too,  
“Take care of them for me, be brave, Annie!”  
He smiled at her in a way he always had and for a second, it almost seemed to restore him, and Anne began to believe that he wouldn’t perish, that he would live but then suddenly his hand seemed to relinquish its hold on hers, and Anne tried to squeeze it, but he didn’t squeeze her hand back, it became limper in her hand as his breath seemed to become more strained, as he became weaker.  
Anne didn’t know what to do, she was holding his hand, watching his chest,  
“Aunt?!” Anne cried out in a panic; not sure she could quite comprehend what was happening before her eyes. Her aunt came rushing in, and she sat down beside her niece watching her brother, as she took his other hand,  
“It’s okay, dear. We’ll be fine just let go!”  
Anne thought she was speaking to her, but Anne didn’t want to let go of his hand, because if she did, she was sure he would go to. But then her uncle sighed almost as if at her aunt and her words and Anne almost thought he would open his eyes again but then she noticed his breathing had stopped.  
“He’s not breathing, we need to…”  
“Anne, come, calm down, breathe!” Her aunt told her calmly though tears were upon her cheeks,  
“He’s not…”  
“Anne, he’s gone, he’s gone to paradise. He’s with the boys and the angels now.” Aunt Anne said with a sad smile, and Anne looked at her in disbelief, but her Aunt put her arms around her, taking her head to rest on her chest, as she placed a kiss over her hair,  
“There, there… he wouldn’t want us to cry. He would…”  
“He’s dead!” Anne gasped through her sobs, her tears soaking her aunts dress and she nodded, tears running down,  
“Yes. He is. But it was his time.”  
“It’s not fair, not to you, or me or…”  
“I know.” Aunt Anne told her softly, kissing her forehead, before drying her tears with her hands,  
“I know, Anne.”  
  


“Do you think it will ever stop hurting?” Anne asked quietly, her head on her aunt’s shoulder. They had been quiet for a while, crying, grieving, and waiting for the Reverend to come as well as the help to dress him for his final rest.  
“No, you just make room for it, I reckon.” Aunt Anne sighed, tears had exhausted her, and Anne exhaled as the worst had passed.  
“He said…”  
“That he left Shibden to you?” Aunt Anne enquired and Anne raised her head,  
“You knew?”  
“Yes. He said so when it started to become worse. His will is downstairs. I don’t think it’s been read yet.”  
“Why don’t we wait. It feels wrong when he isn’t even… He is still here.”  
“We’ll wait. Thank you for being here with me. I couldn’t watch him alone. It would feel too strange.” Aunt Anne revealed and Anne nodded,

“It does feel as though he is suddenly going to open his eyes and begin talking again, as if his hands are going to reach out for us as if nothing happened.”  
“Mm, I remember it felt that way when I sat with our mother, I was alone then, deadly afraid that she would wake up again. Your uncle was out trying to get the coffin and such ready at the time. And your father – bless him tried to hurry to get here but too late.”  
“He looks peaceful, does he not?” Anne contemplated and her aunt smiled,  
“Yes, more so than he has in a long time.”  
“I hope he rests in peace.”  
“Oh, what peace he shall have away from all of us!” Aunt Anne smirked at her brother and Anne laughed quietly,  
“He will sit on the first row trying to explain to all what on earth is going on down here.”  
“And he will take care of poor Sam and the other boys for us.”  
“That he will.” Anne smiled at the shell that had once been her uncle and though her chest hurt from the sorrow, she felt so incredibly lucky and grateful to have known such a man.  
“May he rest in peace!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I based this solely on how it twas when my grandfather died and when my grandma died Much of the lines where things my grandfather said to me before he passed. He did not however leave Shibden to me... but he gave me a ring and for that I'm grateful, also he was the most dramatic person I have ever known. He literally acted out a play through his last words to me... He was great!


	23. Defeated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Defeated 
> 
> Ann has decided she shall take Mr. Ainsworth and not Anne. (Sort of)  
> (It's a 'what if' one-shot so it doesn't follow the storyline of the series)
> 
> Also some of it is so cheesy - like I cannot even read it myself. But I don't know here we are. I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love.

They had gone to the chaumiére to be able to talk freely and in private without needing to worry about someone like Mrs. Priestley sneaking in the backway to listen to everything they said. Normally any excursion to the place was filled with warmth, with ringing laughter coming from both females but this time the feeling was that of sorrow and of a hopelessness. The February weather seemed to mirror their insides, the outside was gloomy and dark clouds stretched across the heavens, not a single ray of sunlight breaking through. It was bleak and cold and though dressed for the weather, the biting cold did its best at chilling them and it wasn’t made better by the cold summer hut.   
  
Anne busied herself immediately as they entered, by getting a fire burning in the fireplace – needing to do something with her hands to make the pain bearable. The silence that filled the room just before the flame sparked was plaguing to Anne’s heart, no doubt to Ann as well.   
The fire filled the dark room with light, and warmth began to slowly seep in. Anne made a gesture for Ann to sit down on the sofa in front of the fire. As the blonde sat down quietly, Anne was reminded of their first visit to the chaumiére, when it had just been finished. Tears burned behind her eyelids as she closed her eyes in painful remembrance that they had shared their first kiss just there, right where Ann now sat numbly, quietly. Why was this happening to her again? – When she finally had met her soulmate. Someone who liked her just as she was. Who had asked for no change in Anne; But of course, Anne didn’t deserve her, only she really thought she did; For they could be so happy together, Anne could be so good for her, they could be good for each other. And worst of all, the mere thought sent a dagger through her heart, she loved her. Anne Lister who had travelled around the world, who had experienced more than many got to in a lifetime, who had met people of all sorts, high and low, she was utterly and completely, head over heels in love with Miss Ann Walker who barely dared step out of her own front-door alone. Anne lectured her own heart at that thought; you care not for her. Surely not. She is too poorly for you. Whatever would you do with her abroad? Her heart spoke in protest; you would stay. You would stay in Halifax if that meant she would be your wife. If you could love her – that would be enough – that would be your last and greatest adventure, it would make mountain climbing poor in comparison.   
“Anne?” It was carefully said, as if she was afraid of her own voice,   
Anne opened her eyes, realising she had wandered off in thoughts,  
“Hm?”   
Ann seemed to twist in her seat, unsure of what to say, what could be said after all that had passed? What could she possibly say to Anne, when she had treated her so abominably?   
“What Ann?” Anne urged her, her tone perhaps a little too harsh, she regretted it as soon as it had left her mouth – she didn’t want to sound cold, but it was as if her disappointment leaked through her whole being. Ann had melted her cold heart. Or rather the wall that she had built around it to prevent this from happening. A final blow – a heartbreak without mending.   
“I- I don’t know.” Ann murmured quickly, playing with the fabric on her skirt, not meeting Anne’s eyes. Anne merely hummed annoyed, standing up before sitting down on the sofa. She was only sat a little way away from Ann, but it felt as though it could easily have been miles. Anne didn’t know what to do, what to say. She respected Ann’s personal space. Didn’t know what to say to her because how could they go back to common friendship now? She couldn’t ask her meaningless questions, and in any case that wasn’t why they were there in the first place. Ann wanted to see her. She would need to take charge this time. Anne was too tired, too defeated – her heart was as bruised as her face was. Being beaten up by that thug Mr. Robertson, who no doubt had been paid to do so by Christopher Rawson. ‘Stay away from Miss Walker’ he had said before he had spat her in the face – after of course, beating her up properly, pushing her up against a wall… trying to… hm… Anne didn’t know what to say. She was, for once, speechless. So, they sat in silence, the only sound inside the chaumiére was that of the fire, that and Anne’s endless flickering with her pocket-watch – a nervous tick if anyone took notice. Second by second slipped away from her. She was getting too old for this. Soon her hair would turn grey and she would be alone and miserable until they buried her cold in the grave. Maybe Ann would regret everything then – when it was already much too late. Standing atop her grave setting down pretty flowers – that did her no good.   
“Anne…” Ann finally spoke again, and Anne flicked her pocket-watch shut and put it inside her waistcoat, quirking an eyebrow, waiting for the blonde to continue.   
“I’m sorry, I’m, I’m so sorry for what I said.” Ann whispered, glancing at the brunette from under wet eyelashes. It tugged at Anne’s heart seeing her upset, but what about herself? She was the one hurt in the end.   
“You say you are, but how does that make it alright?”   
“I know it doesn’t… but I shouldn’t have said it. I didn’t mean it.” Ann stuttered,   
“You said that what I was… was queer, repugnant and against God.” Anne repeated, her voice only faltering a little and Ann let out a quiet sob at hearing her words repeated.   
“Oh, Anne, I… I didn’t mean it…”   
Anne stood up, pulling off her glove and kneeling by the fire, she looked Ann in the eye before putting it in the fire. The blonde watched intently, and then Anne pulled it out, blew out the fire that still ate on the glove and then she stood up waving the ruined glove in her hand,   
“Apologise to it.” Anne asked her, and Ann glanced up at her a bit confused but at another urging did as she was told.   
“I’m sorry.”   
“Is it mended?”   
“No,”   
“There. Just because you say you’re sorry doesn’t mean it is better because of it.” Anne muttered before throwing her ruined glove away. Ann whimpered as she tried to suppress another sob,  
“I didn’t mean to hurt you, Anne. I was just… so scared. It’s no excuse, I promise – what I said was unforgivable and I understand if you never want to see me again. But I…” Ann trailed off, tears running down her cheeks and Anne had to avert her eyes for a second to not cave in.   
“But what? What Ann!?” Anne yelled, and the young woman flinched in her seat, and there was another twinge in Anne’s heart- finally she understood all those fools – fools in love who would hang themselves to end their suffering – their misery.   
“I love you.” Ann whispered with a shaky breath, and Anne felt a full blow to her heart. Of course, Ann had said those words before to her – but it meant nothing when one was giving the other a ‘kiss’ – then it might as well just be the heightened feelings, the throes of passion. But this, this meant something and therefor broke Anne more. Why did she have to love her back? If she hadn’t Anne might convince herself that the woman didn’t even love her and so on. It might have been easier to move on but how could she walk away when she knew this? Knew that she really did love her back.   
“How dare you say that to me!?” Anne growled, as tears pricked her dark orbs,   
“I… but I do.”   
“How can you do this thing to me? Hm?” Anne couldn’t hinder the tears any longer, Ann looked startled, as if she didn’t know quite what she had done wrong.   
“How can you tell me that you love me when we both know it will come to nothing? You have already decided it shan’t work so why tell me that and plague me more!?”   
Ann didn’t say anything, hadn’t time to say anything,   
“I… could make you so happy and yet you’d rather marry some fucking scoundrel instead of me? Why would you do this to me!? Do you understand that I have feelings too? Hm? You promised me. You promised me!” Anne’s voice though booming at first shrunk to a mere whisper, a sob. Anne sank down to the floor, head in hands, she was defeated. At last someone had managed to crush her, and who would have thought, in the end that it would be Ann Walker. Mariana might have teared her down, might have given her a self-consciousness about her body, a belief that in the end no one could really love her. But hope was a trusty friend, a trusty friend whom Ann Walker had killed by rejecting her after she had nurtured her with her kindness, good nature and love. Anne didn’t think even Paris could distract her from this heartbreak, no, not Paris, not London, not Copenhagen or Moscow – not even Rome. This time she had nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. She would have to face this head on.   
Her sobs shook her body violently, and she couldn’t help but feel so pathetic. She never cried in-front of people. Never. Not to say that she didn’t. Because she did have feelings. All though they always seemed to surprise people. She guessed it had to do with the fact that they’d rather she be less human in their eyes, so it was easier to hate her, to spread rumours and say nasty things to and about her. But in the end, she was alone. So alone in the world and she wanted nothing more than to be seventeen again. To have her aunt hold her, tell her it was all going to be fine. Her aunt and uncle, who had loved her despite everything. Who despite whatever anyone would say, would comfort her and tell her that she was a beautiful young woman with so many prospects; Where had time gone? What had happened to all those lovely promises? It had all lead to her breaking down, sobbing on the cold floor, in front of Ann Walker who had once and for all truly broken her heart.   
  
Warm arms draped across her shoulders, surprising her, the heat almost burning her. Anne felt herself being pulled back to rest against soft skin, and she heard a strong, steady heartbeat under her ear.   
“Anne,” Ann murmured her voice full of sympathy, and Anne couldn’t help a cry escape her, because every time she called her name – it was, so soft, so tender as if she truly did love her.   
“I’m sorry. I- I just… feel so conflicted. I don’t know what to make of it all. I don’t want to marry him. Trust me. If I weren’t so scared to lose you, that you would be fed up with me, that somehow, I’ll, we’ll be exposed and they would do something to you, to us… I wouldn’t hesitate a second. Because I adore you, I love you so much, Annie.”   
Anne crampingly gripped onto Ann, weeping, her heart giving her so much pain, and Ann kissed her over the hair sweetly, though perhaps a little hesitant.   
“Don’t leave me… please! I- I could never be fed up with you, Ann. And, isn’t it worse – living a life without each other than risking sorrow? Because – it’s worth it, right? To love and to live and be happy for as long as we may. They wouldn’t expose us. They wouldn’t know. Assumptions might be made but… beyond that – nothing. Don’t leave me.” Anne plead, not raising her eyes, or head, but keeping her ear firmly pressed against her chest, letting Ann’s heartbeat soothe her.   
“I…” Ann began but quieted, and Anne sat up, drying her tears with the back of her hand, furious with Mrs. Priestley for using Miss Parkhill who in her turn poisoned Ann’s mind against her, furious with Ann for not fighting them.  
“Do you love him?”   
“No, of course not!”   
“Does he love you more than me then?” Anne asked crossing her arms on the floor and she could see tears well up in those blue eyes that she loved so much,   
“No, Anne…”   
“Well, do you love me?” Anne asked and Ann bit her lip, distressed,  
“You know I do!”   
“Then, why can’t you just… Why would you choose to be unhappy then?” Anne bit, and Ann shook her head,  
“It’s not that simple.”   
“Isn’t it? You could easily say yes to me – and I would do everything I could to make you happy, we could be happy. I would take care of you, love you. Or you say yes to him and live a life in misery – or you say no to me and to him and then rot away alone.” Anne barked, knowing she was too harsh on Ann, but she was upset, and angry and had no time to consider that. Anne had been through a lot of trouble to ensure Mr. Ainsworth could come nowhere near Ann ever again after what he had done to her – and here she was rather taking him than her.   
“Anne…” Ann began but Anne stood up hastily,   
“I am wasting my time and will leave you now. Don’t call for me again. Do me that curtesy. Because I couldn’t bear it. I would come immediately – tormenting myself with the power you have over me. So, don’t. Don’t keep in touch. Goodbye Miss Walker.” Anne gave her one last look, a tired, hurt and defeated sort of look before securing her hat on her head again motioning for the door. She could hear Ann’s suppressed sobs and they cut through her like daggers, but she pushed the feelings away, opening the door that would then close its way to their relationship forever. Anne spun around and closed the door before even taking in the surroundings. When she did, she was struck by snowflakes whirling so fast that they stung her already bruised face. She became instantly worried for Ann; how would she make it back to Crow Nest when you couldn’t even see your hand in-front of you in the settling darkness and blizzard. Anne took a step forwards and sunk down almost to her knee. How had the snow fallen so quickly, so deep? How had they not noticed a blizzard picking up? Anne was at loathe to go back inside. But walking a few feet in the deep snow she realised she could hardly make out the chaumiére and it was right behind her she knew. Her traces almost immediately being blown away. Anne shook her head, she wasn’t an idiot, nor was she that proud. She might be hurt, but she had no will to die, not like that anyway, and more so wanted not Ann to get hurt. Anne ploughed her way back to the chaumiére, opening the door before stepping inside again, closing the door that the wind seemed to get hold of for a second. Ann looked up surprised, her eyes red and puffy. Anne looked away,   
“You came back!” Ann said in disbelief, standing up, embracing the brunette who tensed. It hurt too much, having her close, knowing she would never be hers. Ann seemed to realise her own mistake and let go, and Anne would never admit how much she missed her near. She merely scowled,   
“Yes. Well, there’s a blizzard outside. Snow almost up to my knee and the sight so bad you cannot see your hand in-front of you. I’d be foolish to try and navigate my way back.”   
Anne said it in a way as if to make it clear to Miss Walker that she hadn’t returned for her sake, all though, she had. In reality Anne might have tried if the blonde wasn’t out in the storm.   
“Oh?” Ann went over to the window and opened the blinds and was astonished to see the winter landscape outside and her expression turned to that in thought. Anne wondered if she thought what she had; how had they not heard the roaring blizzard outside? It was wheezing and rattling the windows. The fire seemed to burn lower, as air escaped through the chimney. Anne kneeled before it to throw in more logs, try to keep the room moderately warm for as long as possible. They might need to stay the night there, Anne feared it. Anne sat herself by the small table, indicating that she was in no mood to talk, and eventually Ann seated herself on the couch. Anne could feel and did notice that Ann would glance at her every so often. But she said not a word. Which was lucky, because Anne was certain that if she did, she would crumble down – beg her forgiveness, kiss her and let her break her all over again. Anne picked up a book that she had left in the chaumiére at one point, but it couldn’t hold her attention, she was hyper-aware of every breath Ann took, of every movement she made. She watched her over the edge of the book – pretending to be engrossed in it. Eventually, after perhaps three hours had passed in this manner and as the darkness had fully set in and as the blizzard gave no indication that it was stopping anytime soon, Ann took courage and turned in her seat,   
“What happened to you?”   
Anne startled a little despite having had her attention solely on the young woman since sitting down, it took her so off guard that she hadn’t even time to pretend to be snarky,   
“What? What do you mean?”  
“Your face… you’re bruised.” Ann mumbled pointing at her own eyes, and Anne closed her book with a soft thud,   
“Nothing.”   
“I may not be as well-versed as you in anatomy, but I do know that you don’t bruise without cause.” Ann persisted with a sternness not familiar from her.   
“I was beaten up.” Anne muttered after a few seconds, before opening her book again, to ignore Ann but the blonde wouldn’t let her,   
“Where?”   
“Just down Lightcliffe road.” Anne told her dismissingly, but Ann wouldn’t let her be,   
“Who would do that to you?” Ann asked her voice trembling with sympathy for the brunette,   
“Ask your cousin, he seemed to think it was necessary.”   
“My cousin? Christopher didn’t do that to you!? Was it because of the coal?”   
“Christopher ordered a man to do it. An ambush, rather cowardly, I think. But no, it wasn’t for the coal – the man told me to stay away from you.” Anne said curtly, trying to return to her fake reading of the book. She was really in no mood for this.   
“Because of me? Oh, Anne… I,”   
“Mm, in the end I think it had to do with the coal. They must have realised that my ‘investor’ was you and wanted to make sure that it would go.” Anne waved her hand and looked down on the page of whatever book it was that she held – she wasn’t sure.   
“I would, I said, I would, and I still would loan you the money, Anne.” Ann said then and Anne looked up,  
“Mm, and I made it abundantly clear didn’t I, that I’d rather starve than be treated as some charity case – like some, like a whore by someone else’s wife.”   
“I- I never said you were a whore.” Ann insisted, and Anne laughed a dry, cold laugh,   
“No. But you did say… you suggested that you marry him for propriety’s sake and then have me on the side. Making me a fornicator, part in adultery, and if then given money by you – a whore. All though I guess even common whores would have more dignity than I in that situation.”   
Ann let out a frustrated, hurt cry but Anne didn’t acknowledge it, she wasn’t the one keeping them apart – she was. She had no right to cry, Anne thought bitterly as she blinked away the tears that burned behind her own eyes, trying to read whatever the words printed on the pages were.   
When she couldn’t bother with it any longer, she picked up her pocket-watch, flicking it open with unnecessary force, she was closer to half eleven, and, Anne thought as she gazed out the window, the blizzard was nowhere near taking off. They would be stuck there for the night – and they fire was slowly dying. Anne stood up and stretched her back, before approaching the fireplace. She could see and feel that Ann’s eyes were on her, watching her every movement as the last logs were thrown into the fire. Ann stood up and made her way to sit at the table. Anne suspected it was to give her the sofa for a few minutes, having spent so many hours sitting on an uncomfortable chair. She was beginning to be very tired. She had been up at five that morning after hardly having slept- her ribs still bruised from the beating. Maybe she would lie down – in front of the fire and rest her eyes for a while. Anne went and opened the chest behind the sofa, where one blanket was stored. She then proceeded to lay her greater coat down on the floor in front of the fire, taking one of the two pillows on the couch and putting it on the floor. Anne undressed slightly – to be more comfortable. She removed her cravat that felt tight on her throat, pulled her shoes off, her waistcoat, skirt and then, without taking her shirt off from over her undershirt and corset she managed to loosen it by a fair bit, making breathing easier. Anne pulled the pins from her hair, letting her brown lengths cascade down her shoulders. She did all this without looking to Ann at all. Then she lay down in-front of the fire, pulling the blanket over her body, trying to keep warm despite the cold floor, and the cold wind leaking in from outside. Exhaustion hit her and she fell asleep after a while but woke within the hour again – colder. The fire was mere ember and the room was starting to get rather chilly. Anne turned to see if Ann was asleep on the sofa but there was no one there. She sat up hurriedly looking about herself before seeing her crawled up on the chair by the table still – shivering, rattling her teeth. Anne was struck by a feeling of sympathy – ashamed that she had let her own feelings take control like that. Her head might protest her heart, but Anne stood up letting the blanket fall to the floor before closing the gap between them. Anne touched her cheek with a soft, warm hand and Ann turned her face up to her – it was clear that she had been crying. Anne brought her up to her embrace, holding her to her tightly,  
“Forgive me, Ann. Please.”  
“It’s me who should beg you of forgiveness.” Ann wept into her neck, and Anne held her to her, kissing her over the hair.  
“No matter. Come, you must be freezing.”   
Anne lead her to the fireplace and helped her first remove a few layers of clothing to make lying down easier, before Ann lay down by the ember. Anne situated herself behind her, draping a warm, comforting and protective hand over her waist, after pulling the blanket snuggly around them.   
“Do you think we’ll be able to make it out of here by the morrow?” Ann asked her softly, and Anne sighed in her ear,  
“I don’t know.”   
There was a silence again, and Anne relished only in the feeling of having Ann pressed to her, having her so near – that she for the moment might not have cared about the fact that she would never choose her in the end.   
“I’m glad you didn’t leave. I don’t know what I would have done without you here.” Ann murmured,   
“You have got to stop having such a poor opinion of yourself, Ann.” Anne whispered in her ear, tiredly, placing a soft, chaste kiss below it. Ann shivered at this,   
“I don’t, I told you, I don’t when I’m with you.”   
“Then never leave me.” Anne mumbled, though perhaps more in a sleepy dreamy state of mind. But Ann turned around in her embrace, so they lay facing each other, and she stroke hair out of Anne’s face softly, with tender fingers, and then she kissed her on the mouth with uncertainty first before it grew more passionate. Anne responded hungrily, devouring in the sweet kiss Ann granted her. The blonde then ran her tongue against her bottom lip, before tugging at it softly and Anne moaned so loud that a blush immediately appeared on her cheeks and Ann laughed kindly at her before kissing her again.   
“You undo me.” Anne sighed, not meaning for Ann to hear but she did, and her heart swelled with pride, she couldn’t fathom that she had such a hold on Anne Lister. A woman she had looked up to and loved since her teens. A woman she had been certain would never look more than once her way, who would surely find her uninteresting and dull – but now here they were. Closely wrapped around each other, in a blizzard – kissing and grabbing at each other as if there was no tomorrow, and she felt safe – away from Crow Nest, away from all opinions and all ‘well-meaning’ prying relatives. Her anxiety was long gone when she was in Anne’s embrace. Ann couldn’t wish for other than that morning might never come.   
“I love you Anne. I am in love with you.” Ann murmured against her lips and she then proceeded to kiss away the tears that had fallen from Anne’s eyes.   
“Do-Don’t- please- don’t leave me.” Anne begged her, knowing she would be gone in the morning, but Ann took hold of her face. Forcing her to look at her.   
“I won’t.”   
“Ann, what are you…” Anne began closing her eyes, feeling all the pain in her heart.   
“I won’t leave you.”  
“You say that now but what about morning when everyone else is there again.” Anne muttered and Ann kissed her sweetly,   
“I will tell them to fuck off.”   
Anne was so shocked by the words Ann had just said so she could do neigh but laugh.   
“What?”   
“I will tell them that it’s my life. That I won’t get married and that I will be your companion and if they have an opinion on that they can fuck off.” Ann told her seriously, and Anne shook her head,  
“Don’t tease me with that. Not when you know how much I’ll hurt when you leave me.”   
“I’m not. I am determined to have you. I will take the sacrament with you. I want to be your wife. I want you to be my wife.”   
“You want to marry me? And live with me at Shibden?” Anne asked as if she couldn’t believe her ears, and Ann smiled and nodded,   
“Yes. But I might need your help to face them.”   
“Of course.” Anne was overjoyed, she didn’t know what to do with all the emotions that went through her being,   
“I will take you back to Shibden tomorrow. They cannot touch you there. Then I will take you to York to see Dr Belcombe and when you are ready – I will, we will marry.” Anne told her, kissing her forehead. Ann grinned and they kissed again.  
“I would like that. And thank you, Anne – for not giving up on me.” Ann murmured; their foreheads pressed to one another affectionately – ready to take on the world together.   



	24. Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Friend 
> 
> Anne contemplates what it means to be friends... and Ann interrupts.

Anne had a lot of friends scattered all over not just England but all across Europe. She wouldn’t perhaps call them all friends more than in passing, there were very few of the many that were close to her and whom she considered great friends. Most of them unnerved her, one way or another. May it be stares or comments that she couldn’t feel comfortable with or customs that she found difficult to appease to. It was difficult was it not, to be oneself and consider them to know you when they wanted to change part of you. Anne had always found it a challenge to her mind, but she had never contemplated the fact that maybe friendship, and what more, relationships were supposed to make you feel better about yourself. Not the other way around. Maybe it wasn’t all about developing oneself to become a better person, at least not when that meant being someone you’re not.   
Then Ann Walker had made entrance into her life at a spur of a moment. Anne had turned around and met her eyes, shaken her hand and that had been it. She was to stay inveigled in her life from that moment on. Anne thought back at that moment and found a true friend in Ann Walker from the start. She didn’t scrunch her nose at her and had never once asked her to change what she was wearing for a dinner or an outing. Ann had embraced her as she was, for who she was. Their friendship was mutual, and good for them both. There could never be a greater friend than the one Anne had in Ann Walker.   
“A penny for your thoughts?” Ann touched her cheek and dark eyes turned up to meet hers, and Anne smiled,   
“I was just contemplating what a good friend you are, and how I ever deserved such a friend as you.”  
Ann chuckled softly, running her fingers down Anne’s face before smirking at her,   
“Friends? What, what have I done?”   
“What? Nothing, I was just… I said you were a good friend how is that in any way accusing you of something?” Anne asked confused at the blonde’s comment. Ann laughed again, leaning closer to Anne’s face, so close that Anne could feel her breathing on her skin, and then she pressed a gentle kiss against her lips and Anne closed her eyes to relish in the feeling all though it were swift and over much too quick for her liking.   
“I’d rather hoped you considered us more than friends, Miss Lister.” Ann murmured, remaining in close proximity to the brunette who then grinned from ear to ear, chuckling,   
“Ah, yes… of course.”   
“Because, unless I gravely misunderstood you, Miss Lister, I thought this ring symbolised something else than just common friendship.” Ann said amused, as she let her hand trace the wedding band on Anne’s hand and Anne took hold of her left hand placing a kiss over it before eying her with mirth,   
“Why, what else could we possibly have done? We are after all, Miss Walker – great friends. Everyone knows that.”   
“Oh, yes. We are respectable women who are friends and that is the beginning and end of it! I don’t know what else we could be. Sisters?” Ann looked at the brunette who closed her eyes, laughing, shaking her head, with a look of mild disgust,   
“Urgh, no… not sisters. That’s taking it too far.”   
“I’m sorry if I offended your sensitive mind, Miss Lister.” Ann laughed, and Anne pulled at her hand to bring her down for another sweet kiss,   
“Do friends do that?” Ann asked amused and Anne rubbed her nose against hers fondly,   
“Occasionally. But only to exceptionally special friends.”  
“Oh really? I must tell Catherine!” Ann teased and Anne growled and kissed her roughly,   
“No, mine!”   
“Miss Lister, what are you five?! People can have more than one close friend.”   
“Not as close as I.” Anne replied, tracing Ann’s knuckles with her hand, paying special attention to the wedding band on her fourth finger.   
“Hm…” Ann pretended to think, and Anne ran her hand alongside her arm,   
“Not as close as your wife.”   
“I have a wife!?” Ann gasped mock-shocked, “Did you know that?”   
“If you do not stop pretending to have forgotten about us, then I shall have no choice but to…”   
“But to what?” Ann smirked, and Anne gave her a look before kissing her chastely,   
“You are such a tease, Ann!”   
“You started it!”   
“I only said you were a good friend, my closest might I add. It’s a good thing, surely? To be best friends with one’s wife, is it not?” Anne asked her and Ann sat down on her lap, taking her face between her hands before smiling wide,  
“I suppose it is – the absolutely best thing.”   
They kissed softly, sweetly and slowly relishing in being with each other, unbothered for the time being, Anne couldn’t even fathom how she had ever passed her days before Ann had come into her life. What had she done with all these feelings? How had she ever lived without Ann? It seemed impossible now to go even a day without her company, without her near, without her kisses.   
“Do you really like me? Or are you just putting up with me?” Ann asked, playing with her hands absentmindedly and Anne rolled her eyes,   
“You know I expect those kind of stupid questions from Miss Parkhill or even Marian but, when you ask them, I just feel insulted. Do I like you? Well I don’t usually marry people I don’t particularly like, nor do I…” Anne was interrupted by a kiss, and Ann chuckled against them,   
“I love you Anne, I’m only teasing you.”   
“Well stop that.”   
“But that’s what friends are for…”   
“You’re my wife.”   
“And your friend mind you, as for being your wife – now that entails a different kind of teasing.” Ann smirked and Anne growled at her, pressing a kiss to her cheek,

“That’s just mean! She’s only four in the afternoon?! I shall have to wait to at least eight-nine until I whisk you off to bed.”   
“Do friends do that?” Ann asked innocently and Anne pushed her off her knee and leant over her on the sofa before tickling her sides, making the blonde roar in laughter, whilst Anne told her with a smile,   
“Stop saying that!”  
“Anne! God, Anne please… stop!” Ann cried laughing but Anne didn’t cease unfortunately Marian barged through the door, or more walked inside, and stopped at the sight, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms at them,   
“Oh for the love of… I can’t even sit in the blooming sitting room anymore!”   
“Sorry, Marian.” Ann panted, out of breath from laughing and Anne smirked at her sister,   
“We weren’t doing anything.”   
“I’m sure you weren’t, but it was a good thing I came in and interrupted this before…” Marian was interrupted by Ann who sat up on the sofa, still flushed from the tickling,   
“We were just celebrating the joys and gifts of friendship.”   
“That’s what you call it? Hm, I must say I don’t have very good friends then.”   
“That’s not shock…” Anne was stopped from saying anything mean by Ann swatting her over the head,   
“Ouch.”   
Anne rubbed her head, glaring at the blonde who gave her a sharp look,   
“We are done now, Marian if you want to join us for some tea.”   
“Tea would be lovely, thank you, Ann.” Marian smiled kindly towards the blonde and Anne sighed, friendship was great, but must her sister and wife be such good friends? **  
**


	25. Hide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Hide
> 
> They play hide and seek to pass time during heavy rain...

It wasn’t always difficult to predict the weather; one could look for many signs in the heavens and in the nature to see whether it was going to rain or blow up to a storm. That morning the sun had been shining through the clouds and it looked as though it might be a fine day.   
Anne had set off to Crow Nest to pay Ann a visit as she had promised she would the day before, and Anne rather kept to her promises. But just a short while after she had arrived to join the party the sun disappeared, and the wind picked up and heavy rain began falling.   
It wouldn’t have been equally unbearable if it were just her and Ann but with them was Mrs. Priestley, Mrs. Jeremiah Rawson, Miss Catherine and Delia Rawson and Miss Harriett Parkhill. The conversation was overall fine, but Anne was growing restless, she flicked her pocket-watch open and closed – a nervous tick mainly because she was beginning to feel the boredom settle in her shoulders and Ann was too far away. She was on the other side, on the other sofa. All she wanted was to reach out and caress her cheek, and maybe kiss her for a bit, and then… Anne sighed, there was no hope for that now.   
“It doesn’t look like the rain is stopping anytime soon.” Anne mumbled as she stood herself by the window looking out. The other women merely nodded in agreement.   
“Should we play a game?” Harriett suggested and the other girls lit up, but Anne stood by the window waiting till a proposal of game had been made before she made any comment on it.   
“Couldn’t we play hide and seek? Oh please! We always used to have such fun doing that when we were younger!” Catherine said excitedly and somehow, she managed to get everyone to agree – even Mrs. Priestley who had eventually resolved, giving them a gleeful,   
“Oh go on then!”   
Anne turned from the window and her eyes found Ann’s blue ones immediately and she smiled when the blonde quirked a brow as if to ask if she would participate.   
“Who should begin counting?” Catherine asked as they had decided that the whole house expect for Ann’s room was up for hiding in.   
“You should as it was your idea.” Harriett smiled and Catherine nodded in agreement,   
“I will count to a hundred – slowly.”   
Catherine sat down on the sofa, closing her eyes,   
“One…two…”   
Anne sprang into action and ran out of the room, thinking to herself as she ran where would be a good place to hide. Maybe somewhere where no fine lady would think to look. A servant’s passage or something like that. Anne went into a room upstairs that she hadn’t been to before – but she concluded it must be Ann’s father’s old study, and she closed the door behind her, and all sound died out. Anne ran her hands over the books, but it stopped over one of the hardbacks, Anne raised an eyebrow – this didn’t feel the same. She went to pull it out but when she did a secret door swung open, hidden in the bookshelf. Anne smiled to herself and went inside the tiniest of sitting rooms – there was only a large armchair, a small table with an old bottle of brandy on it and a small window. It was well hidden this room and judging by the dust – not even the servants had been in here for years.   
“Brilliant.” Anne hummed and closed the secret door behind her. She was certain no one would find her here, and she wondered if she would dare to sneak out to fetch a book so she could sit and read for a while. But there were sounds coming from the study and Anne looked around in a panic for somewhere to hide better in the room. Maybe Catherine knew of this secret room. Anne realised it was pointless trying to hide so she sat down and crossed her legs, waiting to be found. The door opened but it wasn’t Catherine but Ann.   
“Ann!” Anne said surprised and the blonde jumped startled but sighed relieved,  
“Oh its only you!”   
“I thought you were Catherine.” Anne smiled and Ann shook her head laughing,   
“No, I didn’t think anyone knew about this room – but I see nothing gets past you, Anne.”   
“I found it by pure accident.”  
“Maybe I should look for another hiding place then – only Catherine was so close to a hundred. She will find me first.” Ann said but Anne’s hand found her arm, stopping her,   
“No – let’s hide together!”   
Ann tucked her lip under her teeth, looking adorable, and Anne placed her free hand on her other arm and then smiled small before leaning down to capture her lips in a sweet kiss. Ann sank into her and Anne held them up.   
“I’ve missed you.” Anne murmured against her lips and Ann’s chuckles vibrated against her lips, and they pulled apart for a second,   
“You’ve been here all morning, and the day before that.”   
“Mhm…” Anne murmured against her lips, sending shivers down Ann’s spine, and she placed a featherlight kiss on top of her pink lips, devouring her slowly,   
“But I haven’t been able to do that when nothing else has been on my mind since I left you yesterday.”   
“You jest! – You do not wander around thinking about me all the time.” Ann replied but her voice shook a little as Anne trailed kisses down her jawline, down her throat and when she moaned Anne grinned into her neck before releasing her – pressing a rough kiss on her lips,   
“You underestimate me… I can think of you even as I’m doing business. I can promise that I think of you when I… ah- I shall not say.”   
Ann pouted at that tease, and Anne went to kiss her, but the blonde moved out of her way, so she was met with air. It was Anne’s turn to pout and Ann laughed quietly at her.   
“Unless you tell me Lister, there will be no more kisses.”   
“Urgh, minx! I could kiss you if I wanted to.”   
“Yes, but you won’t.”   
“Ah, damn my morals!” Anne groaned but she wore a smile all the while and Ann went up to her,   
“Do you think about me when you play hide and seek?” Ann asked and Anne looked completely bewildered, glancing at Miss Walker who looked so deviously and mischievously at her, biting her lip looking annoyingly enticing.   
“What?”   
Ann merely stared at her, her mouth twitching as she tried to not laugh, and then Anne gasped, as it dawned upon her, and she swatted the woman playfully across the arm,   
“Ann! That’s the worst euphemism I have ever heard!”   
“What? I didn’t say anything!”   
“You were thinking it!” Anne pointed a finger at her, and Ann looked at it and then at her,   
“All I was asking was if you thought about me during hide and seek – there’s nothing untoward about that.” Ann said innocently and Anne pulled her to her and murmured,   
“Liar.”   
Before pressing a kiss to her lips, to which Ann answered readily, but then she let go,  
“I am not lying.”   
“More lies, Miss Walker? You expect me to believe that?”   
“Says the woman who thought I would believe that she had never done this before.” Ann replied with a cheeky smile and Anne’s mouth fell open again as she laughed in disbelief – who was this sassy woman and where had sweet, innocent Ann gone? Ann couldn’t help but laugh at her expression because Anne was so stunned and speechless and it weren’t often it was so.   
Suddenly there were sounds inside the study – Catherine looking for them and Anne realised she might hear Ann’s laughter so she did what any reasonable person would do – she kissed her to muffle her laughter.   
“I haven’t found Ann or Miss Lister anywhere… have you seen them?” They heard Catherine say to presumably the others whom she had found.   
“Well they’re not, any of them, in here in any case.” They heard Harriett say and soon the voices died out and Anne released Ann from their kiss. Red-faced and panting Ann grinned up at the brunette,   
“We will win for sure.”   
“Hm.” Anne agreed before kissing the blonde again hungrily against the wall, her hands trailed from her shoulders and found something pleasant, and she let go of Ann’s lips for a second as the blonde moaned and she smirked at her,   
“Do you want me to take you to Italy?”   
“How is that better than hide and seek?” Ann replied panting and Anne growled at her, kissing her neck,   
“Shut up!”  
  
After they had kissed each other senseless and beyond all reason and more, they noticed that time had flown away – it had been two hours. Anne and Ann smiled at the other and they began laughing,  
“Do you think they gave up on finding us, Ann?” Anne asked and the blonde grinned,   
“I guess they aren’t as well versed in hide and seek as you and I.”   
  
After making sure both of them were presentable they ventured downstairs and everyone looked up to greet them,   
“Where on earth were you? We couldn’t find any of you anywhere!” Catherine exclaimed and Anne could see Mrs. Priestley were eying them closely but there was really nothing to remark on.   
“Ah, well I shan’t say – what if we play some other time?” Anne shrugged her shoulders with a small laugh.   
“The others I found in twenty-five minutes! I gave up after an hour and a half with you.” Catherine told them and Ann glanced at Anne before looking at her cousin, smiling sweetly  
“Well not everyone is as experienced at playing hide and seek as Miss Lister. She taught me a lot today.”   
Anne had to bite her tongue down hard not to laugh at that, especially since Mrs. Priestley looked intently on her to try and discern if that was a euphemism, she settled on smiling agreeably to the party.   
“I guess if we all teamed up with Miss Lister – we would win every time.” Harriett replied bitterly and Anne smiled,  
“With a little practice – you can win on your own.”  
No one would ever know for sure why that caused Ann to burst out laughing – the others just followed as it was a contagious laughter, and soon enough the rain stopped falling. **  
**


	26. Music

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Music 
> 
> I decided for this one to go to music for inspiration (not that I don't do that a lot, but today I was more conscious of the fact). The inspiration came from 'Autumn Leaves' with Eva Cassidy.

Rain was pouring down all across the landscape, why one might even think the heavens were hurting, crying in misery over the earth and its occupants. The trees were coloured in reds and gold, though some had turn dull and brown. Anne glanced at them from under her hat, the rain stinging her face with its rapid movements. It was really peculiar she thought, how one would marvel at the trees during autumn; The autumn leaves and their deep earthy smell. When in reality it was rather morbid as the leaves were dying, slowly and silently before their very eyes, not to return. Anne watched as a single leaf singled down from one of the large oak trees and she caught it in her gloved hand, yes it was rather sad she decided before letting it go, pulling her collar up over her ears to continue her march through the miserable rain.   
  
Autumn seemed to have come over night and Anne weren’t sure she particularly liked it as she walked through the muddy grass, and deep puddles that seemed inevitable as they were absolutely everywhere one turned. It was dark too, Anne grimaced, and cold – she was certain they wouldn’t see light until spring again. A depressing thought indeed, Anne peered around the darkness, but it was disheartening; wet, cold, muddy and dark. She was a happy soul indeed when she reached the house, it changed her gloomy mood entirely.  
  
As she stepped inside her face was met with the warmth radiating from every fireplace within the large house, and the smells, she smiled – cinnamon and pumpkin. Anne stripped herself of her outerwear, giving Joseph her coat and hat, ridding herself of her muddy shoes before venturing further into the warmth.   
In the sitting room, candles were lit, and the fire roared in the fireplace and it was as if it drove the depressing winds of autumn away and turned them into pleasantries. On the table sat teacups with piping hot tea and Anne stood breathing in the smells that were in the room when her eyes found deep pools of blue and her still cold lips twitched into a smile as she took in the silhouette of her wife. She had a tartan blanket wrapped around herself to shield from the cold that crept through the walls and looked deliciously warm. Anne fondled her cheek and leant down to capture her warm lips in a soft, sweet kiss and then she pulled away, smirking,   
“You’ve been eating pumpkin pasties.”   
“Great detective work, Anne.” Her wife laughed at her kindly, before Anne kissed her again,   
“You taste just like autumn…”   
“I thought you loathed it!?”   
“Well, I think I changed my mind just now!” Anne smiled as she rested her forehead against her wife’s, breathing in every sense and every smell of autumn and then proceeded to warm them both up sufficiently with warm loving kisses.  
“After all, you are here with me, keeping memories of an everlasting summer.”   
“I’d say it’s rather you that’s making the long days bearable, how did I ever pass autumn alone before?”   
“A happy thought indeed, that we shall never watch the Autumn leaves drift by the window alone again.” Anne said, kissing the corner of her pink lips, running cold hands over her arms, standing still in the embrace that would last them to spring.   
“I missed you today… all day. You left so early this morning.” Ann murmured, her chin resting against Anne’s shoulder whilst Anne rubbed her hands warm over her arms and her back.   
“I missed you too. It was rather depressing out there today. I’m glad you’re here.”  
“As am I.” Ann mumbled, placing a soft kiss on her shoulder, as they began to sway in their embrace.   
“Come, let’s have a dance.” Anne smirked down at her wife who chuckled,   
“But there is no music?”   
“I have been known to hold a tune from time to time.” Anne smiled, and they held onto each other and danced slowly, to Anne’s soft humming.   
“I didn’t know you sang.” Ann smiled and Anne threw her a charming grin,   
“Mostly I play the flute.”   
“You do?”   
“Mm… sometimes. When words aren’t enough.”  
“Like now?”   
“Mm, just like now!” Anne purred against Ann, kissing her over the forehead, and then on her pink lips before continuing their sweet, slow dance.   
Perhaps it wasn’t all bad after all. Autumn had its perks despite its falling leaves and depressing darkness. **  
**


	27. Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tea 
> 
> Marian invites an unwanted guest to stay for tea...
> 
> What is this even? At this point I don't even know myself...

Anne was running around the house in a frenzy. She was currently in the sitting room, in search, turning it upside down. Marian came inside to see what the fuss was all about, more importantly she needed to stop her sister from making a right down mess because the servants did have better things to do than to put a room in order again because Anne was having some sort of meltdown.   
“Anne, what on earth are you doing!? You’re only making the servants jobs that much harder. What if we get company this morning?” Marian scolded, and Anne stopped just as she was about to fling herself under the sofa to have a look, and she gave Marian a sharp eye,   
“I’m looking for my hat. I can’t find it anywhere!”   
Marian raised an eyebrow, a hat, that was what all the fuss was about,   
“Well…”   
Anne stood up to her full height, red in the face, and with a fiery temper she exclaimed,  
“If you have hid it, Marian, I will be furious! This is the fifth time this week, it’s not funny. I am late for my meeting, and I won’t go without my hat – it’ll look off.”   
“I haven’t got your stupid hat, Anne! Why would I want to hide it!?”   
“Because you seem to take delight in making my life as miserable as possible! Now, whoever has my hat will get a…”   
“A what?” Ann’s voice was heard from behind them and the sisters turned around. Marian smirked at the sight, but her sister flushed slightly red, and a gentle smile replaced her scowl,   
“Eh, you found my hat!”   
“Your hat?” Ann batted her eyes innocently at her, making Marian snort amused.  
“I have not a clue what you’re talking about, Anne.”   
Anne took a deep breath to calm herself, exhaling slowly and Marian had a hard time keeping her laughter at bay.   
“I have estate affairs to take care off. Ann – if you please, my hat.” Anne pressed, holding her hand out expectantly, she really didn’t have time for this, but Ann merely smiled sweetly,   
“This hat of yours that you keep talking off – Why I cannot see it anywhere, but if I do, I’ll give you a shout.”   
“Wh… it’s on your head!? Now give it back!” Anne told her cross, and Marian stood laughing silently beside her sister.   
“Well, what would your hat be doing on my head? It seems like your hat would be on your head so this must in conclusion be my hat, Anne.” Ann said matter-of-factly, trying her best not to laugh at Anne’s sulky expression, and she stomped her foot,   
“Ann, give me my hat. That is not your hat – you have no such hat!”   
“Why I must beg to differ, Lister. I do have such a hat – I’m wearing it right now.” Ann stated still smiling, and Anne sighed loudly,   
“You have never worn such a hat before – that is my hat!”   
“I didn’t want you to feel threatened by my good hat, so I haven’t worn it until now.”   
Anne closed her eyes trying to keep calm, and where just about to continue arguing when Joseph came into the room,   
“A note for you ma’am from Mr. Washington.”   
Anne took it from him and opened it swiftly, reading the contents,   
“Well, it seems I don’t have to go anymore since Washington is deterred. Thank you, Joseph.” Anne sent their servant from the room again and turned her dark eyes back to Ann,  
“I’m off.” Ann said and left the room without explanation, leaving Anne staring at her back with her mouth hitting the floors and Marian gave her a nudge,   
“You never thought that would come back to bite you eh?”   
“Ah, shut up, Marian.” Anne muttered, and her sister looked about the room that were in a disarray,   
“Right. Now I’ve only got to tell the servants to make this room presentable again. Anne you do make such a bother for them.” Marian complained and Anne gave her half a look,   
“They are my servants – why shouldn’t I? – I pay them for the trouble.”   
“But…” Marian began but Anne raised a hand,   
“Do whatever you want, I need to get my hat back.”   
“Oh, right because that hat is so…” Marian began but her sister left her standing alone in the sitting room, going upstairs to try and find Ann.   
  
The door to her bedroom stood ajar and Anne went inside and saw the blonde sitting in the window,   
“Seriously, Ann – my hat! When did you become so incredibly stubborn?!”  
Ann looked at her with a huge grin on her face,   
“I think it was right around the time I moved in with you.”   
“Argh, sometimes I fear that I am too good an influence on you. Damn it.” Anne threw her head and Ann laughed at her but gave no indication that she was going to give up the top hat situated over her blonde curls. Anne thought for a minute before softening and smirking at Ann playfully,   
“It does look rather well on you after all.”   
“Oh, you reckon I could pull it off?” Ann asked mirthfully, and Anne approached her slowly,   
“I reckon I will!”   
Anne snatched the hat of Ann’s head but before Ann had time to voice her opposition to that, Anne’s lips crashed onto hers, rendering Ann of all ability to think straight let alone argue.   
The kiss itself had Anne drop her hat to the floor – quite forgotten. But then just as their kisses became more intense, more passionate and desperate – there was a knock on the door. Anne ended their kiss with a sigh, fondling Ann’s cheek affectionately before answering,   
“Yes?”   
The door opened to reveal Marian,   
“There is someone here for Ann, with the Priestley’s.”   
Anne raised her eyebrows at Ann who gave her a confused look in return,   
“Oh, who is the caller?”   
“A Mr. Ainsworth I believe.” Marian replied uncertain,   
“I’ll keep them entertained till you come down.”   
Marian closed the door and they heard her footsteps fade away. Ann’s face had fell and Anne held her in her arms, kissing her softly on the forehead,   
“He can’t hurt you, Adney. If he so much as touches you, I will make him regret the day he was born!”   
“I don’t think you should do anything, Anne – unless absolutely necessary. I don’t want to lose you.”   
“Still. He won’t.” Anne reassured her, and Ann nodded and kissed her chastely before exhaling,  
“Come on then, let’s get it over and done with.”   
  
“Has he really not given up? I thought I made myself…” Anne paused; she hadn’t told Ann that she had interfered last time but Ann seemed more concerned about him being there now than her slip, and shook her head,   
“He writes the Priestley’s, forwarding messages to me via them.”   
“He writes you?! And you haven’t told me this, why?” Anne hissed offended, and Ann gave her a knowing look,  
“Because I know you, Anne. I knew you would probably hunt him down and challenge him to a sword duel.”   
“And win mind you!” Anne added bitterly, and Ann stopped them on the landing, looking at Anne seriously,   
“I haven’t replied in any indecent way, but I couldn’t say to Eliza why I didn’t want to… besides it doesn’t matter. All that matters to me is you and the fact that you’re…” Ann leant closer to her, their lips almost touching,   
“…my wife.”   
Anne’s heart fluttered at those words, it seemed she could never tire of hearing that ‘wife’, and she sighed defeated,   
“Fine. Let’s go down then – it can’t be avoided. Unless you want to jump out a…”   
“Anne.”   
“Fine.” Anne muttered as she tailed along after Ann downstairs.   
  
The Priestley’s and Mr. Ainsworth were indeed waiting in the sitting room and Marian had just called for tea. Just my luck, Anne thought – Marian had to call for tea, and now they were stuck with the company for at least half an hour. Tea was quite possibly her worst enemy right now, landing her with the devil that was Mr. Ainsworth.  
When they entered, he stood up and Anne thought for a second that she might just kick him in the old family jewels but decided against it and only because Ann had given her a stern look a second before. Anne greeted the room, as did Ann briefly.  
“Miss Walker.” Mr. Ainsworth said looking at Ann in a way that made Anne furious, he did not own her.   
“Mrs.” Anne muttered under her breath bitterly and all eyes turned to her,   
“Pardon?” Mrs. Priestley looked at her intently and for a second Anne feared she might have actually heard what she had said.  
“Sorry? Oh, I only had a little something in my throat.” Anne replied short smiling strained at Mrs. Priestley. Mr Ainsworth however turned his attention to Ann again,   
“I must say, Ann, that you look very well. Indeed, one might be so impertinent as to ask how the loveliest of English Roses is doing?”   
Anne almost gagged at the man’s poor attempt at seduction, Marian was flabbergasted by his impertinence, as a reverend no less, and Mrs. Priestley looked pleased – but after all she wanted Ann away from Anne. Ann looked at him innocently,   
“Well I don’t know…”   
Before Mr Ainsworth had time to answer, Ann turned to Anne who was sulking in the corner of the sofa,  
“Anne, how are you doing?”   
“I’m fine. As always.” Anne muttered, resting her head against her hand, and Ann turned back to Mr. Ainsworth,   
“She’s fine.”   
Mr. Ainsworth looked baffled, and his forehead crinkled,   
“Oh? I didn’t know Miss Lister had been feeling under the weather.”   
Ann smiled – clearly pleased with herself when she heard Anne’s quiet snort as the brunette got what she had just done.   
“Tea is here!” Marian exclaimed loudly as if she was trying to steer a sinking ship, and it was a welcome distraction. The tea tray, as well as the coffee pot was placed on the table and Ann offered to pour for them all, but Anne stood up to perform the task. Mr. Ainsworth sat next to Mrs. Priestley and as Anne handed her a teacup, Anne ‘accidentally’ spilt some on Mr. Ainsworth who gave a cry of pain at the hot water landing in his knee.  
“So sorry.” Anne smiled, and he lifted a shaking hand, miss Lister did unnerve him and he was terrified of her.   
Mr. Ainsworth had asked to have coffee poured, exclaiming that he adored the drink but ladies better drink tea as it were milder. Anne poured herself some coffee after that statement, and, didn’t even take it with milk and sugar like the reverend had, and at that he gave a nervous smile and Anne smiled viciously back at him.   
“I must agree with you, Mr. Ainsworth – coffee is far too strong for me.” Mrs. Priestley pressed, giving Anne a displeased look which Anne brushed off.   
“Now, I have to say that coffee is fine in the morning, but I cannot abide to it too much or I upset my stomach.” Mr. Priestley added and Mr. Ainsworth’s eyes wandered to Ann,  
“What is your thought, Ann?”   
Anne clenched her jaw, how dare that man refer to her wife by anything other than her last name.  
“On what, Mr. Ainsworth?” She asked,   
“Men and coffee.”   
“Oh,” Ann blushed prettily,   
“Well, I like my coffee the way I like my men.”   
Mr. Ainsworth clearly saw this as flirting but missed the fact that Ann was drinking tea, and Anne snorted on her coffee, drawing the attention of everyone and Ann, who sat beside her, put down her cup and rubbed her back,   
“Got a little bit stuck in your throat?”   
“Minx.” Anne replied in a strained voice, understood by no one but Ann who smiled back at her.   
  
Marian was an idiot to have invited Mr Ainsworth and the Priestley’s to stay for tea, and now they were all stuck in an awkward situation, Anne thought annoyed, it had been twenty minutes in the making and they showed no signs of leaving.   
The conversation carried on to travels, in which Anne had a lot to say – but was rather quiet because she was focusing on Mr. Ainsworth’s inappropriate stares at Ann. Eventually she was drawn into the conversation, when they began, talking about old tribes in France following an exclaim from Mrs. Priestley that the French was a rather vulgar people in some instances.   
“Is it true that they eat one another when food is scarce?” Mrs. Priestley asked, and Mr Ainsworth nodded,   
“Yes. In desperation they feed on the human flesh. Why I can’t ever think of a situation poor enough to do that- I’d rather die.”   
“To be sure – I would never either – It seems rather vulgar.” Mrs. Priestley agreed and Aunt Anne, who had come down to join them, agreed with her, but then Mr Ainsworth turned his eyes to Anne,   
“Pray, in what circumstance would you, if you would, eat another human?”   
“Who?” Anne asked bluntly,   
This raised a series of eyebrows, but Mr Ainsworth’s shock wore of soon enough,   
“Um, I don’t know, say - Miss Walker?”   
Anne stopped her teacup midway through the air,   
“I’d eat her every night.”   
Then as if nothing had passed, she brought the cup to her lips, at the same time though Ann choked on her tea and Anne rubbed her back for her,  
“You would eat Ann!?” Mrs Priestley looked beyond disgusted, and Anne smirked,   
“Well, a little taste if one’s hungry, surely!”   
“Miss Lister, I’m not sure I understand – you are joking?” Mr. Priestley asked, and Anne smiled at him,   
“Why yes, of course I was! I would never kill Ann… mm perhaps only a little.”  
Anne winked at Ann who once again spluttered on her tea, having them all look at her concerned as Anne ran her hand over her back,   
“Dear Ann, are you quite alright there? Do you need to have a little lie down?” Anne asked in a teasing patronising voice, and Ann glared at her,   
“Oh shut up!”  
Anne merely smiled at her, wishing she could kiss her but alas could not. However, Anne decided that this play had been going on for far too long.   
“Mr. Ainsworth, I have an old bible in the library that I would love for you to take a look at.”   
He seemed surprised at her speaking to him with such politeness that he merely nodded dumbfounded.  
“Of course, Miss Lister.”  
“Mm, good, if you could come with me for a second then.” Anne told him and he gulped but rose to follow her inside Shibden’s library.   
  
Anne allowed Mr. Ainsworth in first before closing the door behind them. He fidgeted with a book on the table, seemingly nervous, and he should be Anne thought.   
“Where is the b-bible, miss Lister?”   
“Do you understand simple requests, Mr. Ainsworth?” Anne asked him, ignoring his question as she got closer to him, and he backed a step and crashed with his back into the table.   
“Yes?!”  
“Do you have a thorough understanding of the English language?” Anne continued striding yet closer to him, and he pressed his back against the table, the wood digging into his back painfully, but he was desperate to escape her.   
“Yes, miss Lister – I studied at Oxford.”   
“Oh? Did you? Well then, Mr Ainsworth, why are you here?”   
“What?” Mr Ainsworth stuttered a little and Anne almost rolled her eyes at him – pathetic.   
“Why are you here? I seem to recall a little conversation you and I had where I made it utterly clear to you that it would be very unwise of you to take the position at Lightcliffe church.”  
“And I didn’t!”   
Anne gave him a hard stare,   
“Hm, yet I remember telling you something else, that is to stay out of Miss Walker’s life – that we should never need bump into you ever again. And here you are, in my house…”   
Mr. Ainsworth pulled at his collar, looking left and right to find an escape, he was uncomfortable and maybe frightened that Anne would do something to him.   
“It’s not up to you.” He managed to squeak out at last, and Anne raised an eyebrow at him,   
“I think you will find that this is my home – and it’s very much up to me who comes here.”   
“I meant with Miss Walker. She isn’t yours to dictate as you want!” Mr. Ainsworth seemed to have found his voice again,  
“Quite right, Mr. Ainsworth. She is here by choice and she doesn’t want you here. No, is a word you should look up and then learn the meaning of!” Anne told him her voice low and threatening.   
“She loves me.”   
Anne scowled, her fingers curling into fists, on the cusp of giving the man a well-aimed hook,  
“Sorry?”   
“She loves me, but you have manipulated her to think that…”   
“I’ll stop you right there, Mr. Ainsworth before you say something that you will regret. You will leave now, this instance or I will expose you for what you really are!”  
“It would be rude to leave without telling Ann goodbye.” Mr Ainsworth panted, and Anne got near his face with a murderous look,   
“I’d take care not to refer to her as such. She is miss Walker to you and nothing else!”   
“Why miss Lister, considering how acquainted I am with Ann it’d be…”   
Anne grabbed hold of his throat, still close to his face,   
“Stay away from her! If you so much as look at her ever again I will horsewhip you until you are black and blue!”   
He whimpered under her grip, and she squeezed tighter before letting go,   
“Get out!” Anne barked and he winched,   
“I cannot, you are in the way.”   
“We are on the first floor – the window is right there behind you.” Anne pointed at the window, and he looked between it and her,   
“Miss Lister…”   
“Out, or I will make sure no more idiots are born.”   
Mr. Ainsworth looked slightly green at that, and sluggishly moved towards the window, Anne eyed him intently – ready to give the man a fight if need be.   
“Go on, open the window and get out!” Anne growled, as he stood hesitating by the window. He opened it, and looked back at her,   
“There is a puddle of mud outside and I…”   
“You’re in luck I see as I have heard that pigs love mud baths.” Anne told him sharply and he grimaced, standing with one leg heaved out the window, still not making the jump. Anne sighed and went over and gave him a nudge out before closing the window with a loud bang.   
Anne went inside the sitting room again and all of them seemed confused as to where Mr. Ainsworth had gone, but Anne sat down as if nothing had happened and smiled,  
“Now, where’s the tea?” **  
**


	28. Idiot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Idiot
> 
> Anne gets trapped into meeting Mr. Abbott...
> 
> (Was it just me that wanted to rip off my own arm just to have something to throw at him during his scenes in the series? Also I blooming love the looks Aunt Anne and Jeremy gives Anne when she asks how it went...)

Anne had been in no want to meet this gentleman suitor of Marian’s named Mr. Abbott, she had done whatever she could to be out whenever he came around. She didn’t know why Marian persisted that she meets him – it wasn’t her who he was there for, and if it was – well then Marian deserved better. She could certainly do better, Anne thought. However, she had been outwitted for Marian had invited him to dinner without telling Anne, and so she had been trapped into meeting him.   
  
Anne stood in the doorway eying the party, her brain reeling, trying to find a possible escape, but they all saw her standing there.   
“Anne!” Marian eyed her sister seriously, and Anne smiled strained back at her.   
“Miss Lister, we meet at last!” Mr. Abbott told her in what Anne thought was an annoying voice. Anne gave a small nod,   
“So we do… what a _pleasant_ surprise this is.”   
Anne glared at her sister for a second and then let her eyes find her aunts who looked equally thrilled about his presence at dinner as Anne – which was not at all.   
“How is Miss Walker doing?” Aunt Anne asked her niece as she sat down in her usual seat around the table and Anne sighed tiredly,   
“Not much improved I fear, but on the mend.”   
“Such sad business.” Aunt Anne commented and Mr. Abbott eyed them, intrigued,   
“Is Miss Walker of Crow Nest ill?”   
Anne’s mouth curdled but little, for she was not about to give this man any gossip to bring around town, especially since they had taken such precautions even with her own family.   
“A little under the weather is all.”   
“Oh? Well, ladies are delicate things, are they not Captain Lister?”   
“Huh?” Captain Lister looked up from his plate, and Anne gripped her knife tighter in her hand,  
“I hope you can understand the impropriety of such a comment at my table, Mr. Abbott.”   
“Oh, I didn’t mean to insult you, Miss Lister, why I would never say such a thing about you. From what I have heard down in Halifax, delicate is not a word associated with you.” Mr Abbott laughed in such a way as to make Anne’s stomach churn – he was vulgar and, her aunt was right – loud and a know-all.   
“Do you usually take part in gossip then, Mr. Abbott?” Anne quirked an eyebrow at him and he seemed a little stumped,   
“Well, no, Miss Lister – but as a man of business I have my ear just about anywhere.”   
“I don’t doubt it.” Anne replied short, focusing on her meal, where had her sister found this man? – Had she no self-pride?   
“I saw that you had made some improvements with the gardens since I last was here.” Mr. Abbott continued, and Marian nodded eagerly, starting to tell him about the plans for the gardens and he seemed far too invested in the conversation. Anne started to wonder if he hoped to tie himself to Marian for some pedigree and eventually to land himself with Shibden.

“As I said last, I was here, these old buildings – you might as well knock them down…”   
Anne’s head snapped up, was the man seriously sitting at her table as a guest at Shibden hall, her ancestral home - suggesting they knock it down? Who was this man? And where did he find all his ill-informed and to be frank idiotic, opinions!?   
“Mr. Abbott, are you suggesting that I demolish my ancestral home? One of the oldest houses in Halifax, where history has been created for the past 400 years.” Anne asked him bluntly and the man seemed to realise his error,   
“Um, eh, no of course not. I just think it must be rather unpractical with such an old building, it must be cold in the winter.”  
“Hm, well it isn’t.”   
“Well, as a man of business, I know that farms aren’t usually well isolated adhering to…”   
“Excuse me?” Anne looked at the man with fury burning in her eyes,   
“Sorry?” Mr Abbott seemed confused and Marian made an attempt to jump in and save the conversation but didn’t have time,   
“Shibden Hall is not, nor has it ever been a farm. I do not know where you get your opinions from – but trust me, you should look for another source of information. You clearly have no idea of how anything works, and I would ask you not to force your ill-informed opinions on us.”   
“I beg your forgiveness Miss Lister if I offended you – it was certainly not my want. I hope we shall be good friends, you and I!” Mr Abbott hurriedly said, and Anne almost rolled her eyes, not in a million years would she befriend such an idiot.   
“’Friend’ is not a term I throw about with ease.”   
“Well then I shall double my efforts so that you may bestow it on me.” Mr Abbott told her, and Anne had to stop herself from banging her forehead bloody on the table. The man couldn’t take a hint, even if it hit him in the face. It was bound to be a painful dinner, for her, her aunt and father who all shared looks of annoyance and a wish for it to end. Anne rather hoped her aunt would stage a fit of some sort so they could flee the table and Mr. Idiot.   
  
“Now I understand that the world is progressing, and we must embrace it, and it is a good thing that it is getting easier for women to inherit. So many have been left standing after fathers and male relatives have died, with nothing. Surely you must see at this change with joy, Miss Lister?” Mr Abbott rambled, and Anne sighed down at her plate, why was he talking to her again, she really had no energy for his idiocy.   
“It is still up to the head of the house to dictate the will so unless we make the change, nothing will change, even if it is a possible change on paper.”   
“But surely, you think well of it? After all, didn’t you inherit Shibden?” Mr Abbott pressed, and Anne exhaled,   
“Yes, through my Uncle’s will to do so. If he hadn’t included it in the will, the estate would’ve gone to my father or some distant relative. Women’s right to inherit rests solely upon men’s willingness to let them, such is progress.”   
“Really? Who will inherit the estate after yourself then ma’am? I hope it’s not an insensitive question, but your time for children must’ve passed.” Mr Abbott said, and the table became silent, Aunt Anne looked as though she might rise to the occasion and kill the man for insulting her niece at her own table. Captain Lister looked at Anne, then Mr Abbott, and lastly at Marian with a look that said; ‘Do you really want that one?’.   
“I cannot fathom in what world that question could be anything other than impertinent, vulgar and rude. Whether I can still have children or not is none of your God damn business!” Anne barked at the man who startled a little,   
“I didn’t mean to offend, I was just curious how you thought…”   
“Well, curiosity killed the cat.” Anne hissed at him,   
“Anne isn’t that old.” Marian blurted out in a half-attempt to steer up the situation – which didn’t work at all.  
“I didn’t think that, I just thought that it takes time to find a husband and then… then it might be too late. But maybe there is a gentleman already?” Mr Abbott stuttered, digging his grave deeper. Anne stood up, rocking the table slightly as she did so,   
“I am not going to sit and be insulted at my own table. Now, I am going out and when I come back – you better be gone, Mr. Abbott!”   
“Where are you going?” Aunt Anne called after her, but Marian scowled,   
“Probably her shed.”   
“It’s not a shed, Marian! It’s a chaumiére.” Anne called over her shoulder annoyed, and Marian rolled her eyes, and muttered,   
“A shed.”   
“I didn’t mean to insult, Miss Lister. But after what I’ve been told down in Halifax about miss Lister, it seemed unlikely that…”   
“Unlikely that what?” Marian saw red,   
“That she should marry because she is qu...”   
“Alright, get out! No one insults my sister but me! You don’t know her!”   
“But I had heard…”   
“Insulting my sister is a privilege, not a right. And no one but me owns that privilege. Leave - Now!” Marian growled, fuming, how dare that man repeat gossip from Halifax. Her sister wasn’t queer – she was perfectly natural, so what if nature had been in an odd freak the day she was made. Anne was her sister and no one, absolutely no one but herself could pick on her.   
When Mr. Abbott had made no effort to move, Captain Lister seemed to finally wake up,  
“You heard my daughter – Get out! Don’t make me call for John to chase you out with my old sword.”   
“I’m sure we can talk this through.”   
“Leave, I never want to see you again!” Marian cried, standing up and pointing at the door with a scowl on her features, she would not be swayed.   
“John!” Captain Lister called and Mr. Abbott clearly had no clue that John was the kindest man in all of Halifax and wouldn’t even knock the skin off a rice pudding for he stood up quickly and bowed his head before rushing out.   
“You called sir?” John came in, and Marian explained briefly what had happened and John widened his eyes,   
“He is a lucky fellow then, because I just saw miss Lister march back towards the house. She looked like thunder.”   
“Do you think he bumped into her?” Aunt Anne asked worriedly, and then they heard a high-pitched cry from outside, and a loud whack and Captain Lister smirked,   
“That’s my daughter!”   
“What an absolute idiot!” Marian muttered, referring to Mr. Abbott, happy that she had seen him for what he really was, an idiot, before she had tied herself to him for life. **  
**


	29. Injury

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Injury 
> 
> Anne gets hurt in a fight... 
> 
> Just a heads up - I clearly have NO medical experience what so ever... this is just my imagination and romantic heart having a go...

There had been a row between two tenants that afternoon and as Miss Lister had seen it, she had stubbornly intervened. Trying to separate the two men who might have killed each other otherwise. Only the two men still tried getting at each other and Miss Lister was caught in the middle. Miss Lister was not known to be a helpless maiden but fighting two raging bulls at the same time weren’t, perhaps, her finest hour. One of the men held a knife and went to stab the other man with it but got Miss Lister instead. Not full on but a deep scratch right underneath her left breast. She was well-masked in her expressions and did not give away just how much that had hurt – years of monthly devils had prepared her for that moment. What it did was however baffling the man who had done it and she gave him a right hook resulting in a heavy nosebleed and the bystanders were shocked. Needless to say, the tenants, if they hadn’t known it before, now were fully aware of the fact that you should never mess with Miss Lister. She had however taken several punches albeit not to the face but determined not to show any sign of weakness, she held her head high and stalked off after growling telling the men that she would see them both about their tenancy tomorrow, first thing. It left the men white in the face, and Miss Lister was pleased. 

Someone who were not as pleased with her was her sister, who had already got her hands on the fact that her sister had been in a fight in the middle of the streets in Halifax. She wasted no time in lecturing her as she entered the hallway of Shibden.   
“Were you really in a street-fight, Anne? This is Halifax, everyone talks and it’s not always nice. They say you took on both Mr Baskerville and Mr Chamberlain, is that true? Tell me, that it’s not true, Anne!”   
Anne fought hard not to roll her eyes at Marian’s rambles but alas the eye roll won.   
“I went in between, I stopped the fight before they killed each other.”   
Anne went straight past her sister, swaying only slightly because of the dizziness that were starting to fog her mind because of the wound that was bleeding on her chest. Marian did notice the stumble and went after,   
“Are you drunk? Really, Anne, she’s only four!”   
Aunt Anne and Miss Walker seemed surprised at this and looked up at the Lister sisters. Anne ignored Marian; she was not drunk in the slightest. Instead Anne bent down to give her aunt a kiss on the cheek and to greet Miss Walker with a subtle but intimate touch of the hand. Trying to act normal and not as if she had just gotten stabbed and beaten up. She would retire with the excuse of needing to change her attire. But Marian was by no means done with her sister, she had kept going on about Anne being a disgrace and now she had paused, hands on hips, nostrils flaring and with an exasperated look over her face she cried frustrated,   
“They say you’re a man. A man in a frock. Do you have any idea of how emba…”   
“That’s enough, Marian!” Anne roared, her wound reminding itself and she could feel her black waistcoat getting more and more soaked in her blood.   
The room had started to spin ever so slightly, and Anne turned on her heels, leaving her astounded sister about to head upstairs. Her face only looking paler by the second. Marian might have thought it was remorse or stubborn pride, but Miss Walker and aunt Anne saw her pain and the older woman urged the blonde to go after her niece and give her a hand up the stairs – figure out what had gone wrong in Halifax really.   
Miss Walker could not catch up with Anne until they had reached her bedroom. Anne was standing with her back to her, still oblivious to Ann’s presence in the room. She was too focused on not fainting from the pain she felt removing her coat and then her waistcoat. But nonetheless a hiss escaped her as she peeled the waistcoat off revealing the thin cotton shirt and under it her stays and chemise which was soaked in her blood. Ann’s eyes widened, and she trembled at the sight of all the blood but forced herself to be strong and went over to Anne, worry etched over her face, taking Anne’s waistcoat from her shaking hands.   
“What happened to you?”   
When Anne didn’t reply, Ann took her face gently in her hands, and forced the woman to look at her,   
“Anne? Talk to me, do I need to send for the doctor?”   
“No, not the doctor. ‘Tis but a scratch.” Anne weakly said and only after Ann had urged her with a gentle press to her hand. Ann took courage and looked down Anne’s form – at all the blood.   
“We need to at least clean the wound.” Ann commented and she undid Anne’s cravat and as she did Anne started swaying, growing yet paler,   
“I think… I think I’m about to be sick!”   
Ann flew under the bed and retrieved the chamber pot to Anne and the brunette threw up violently into the bowl, all the while Ann stood rubbing her back for her, mumbling words of affection.   
“Let us have you sit on the bed, Anne.”   
With a soft and gentle hand pressed against the small of Anne’s back, she led her to sit down on the bed. They removed the stays which also were bloodied.  
Careful, loving hands undid the front of Anne’s chemise and pushed it down over her shoulders and arms, down to her waist. Even if Anne moved as if uncomfortable with her chest being exposed, Ann payed her no heed. They needed to stop the bleeding.  
Anne tried to cover herself with her arms, hissing in pain as she moved them as it stretched the wound, but firm small hands removed them,   
“Ann.”   
It was a plead.   
“A dead wife is no good to me!”   
A sharp look, and Anne resolved and let her arms rest at the sides of her body. Ann eyed the wound under her left breast with a frown, standing up to fetch the linen that lay by the wash basin. She brought the whole thing with some trouble, before kneeling in front of Anne again.   
“This will probably hurt.” Ann whispered weary to bring Anne pain and Anne gave a nod closing her eyes, feeling more uncomfortable with her chest exposed in the light than by the fear that the cleaning of the wound might sting her. Again, the gentle and delicate hands were on her chest and only at the first touch with the cloth to her wound did Anne hiss making Ann grimace, lifting the cloth from her wound,   
“So sorry!”   
Anne shook her head decidedly, closing her eyes,   
“Go on.”   
Ann kept cleaning the wound,  
“Why didn’t you tell us that you weren’t fine?”   
It was said in a displeased tone, but Anne couldn’t help but find her wife adorable when she was angry,  
“I’m fine, it’s just a flesh wound!” Anne persisted, and just then Ann rubbed a little harder having Anne gasp out in pain. Ann raised an eyebrow,   
“You’re not fine! Admit it. Now how did this happen?”   
Anne exhaled slowly, rubbing her temples with her fingers,   
“I tried stopping Mr. Chamberlain and Mr. Baskerville from killing each other, I told you before!”   
“You told Marian. Not me! So, if you would please use another tone with me.”   
Ann dropped the cloth as she had finished cleaning Anne’s wound, at least it wasn’t so deep that it needed to be stitched.   
“We need something to dress it with.” Ann said dryly, annoyed with Anne because she hadn’t told her immediately that she had been stabbed – she could have bled to death by her own stubbornness.   
“In the third drawer.” Anne pointed at the bureau, and Ann stood up and opened it, and rolled her eyes at the bandages inside, saying that her wife was a bit eccentric was only the first name.   
“Do you usually get in these sorts of scrapes then?” Ann asked as she started to wrap the bandage around her torso.   
“It was just a scratch Ann! Calm down!” Anne yelled annoyed to lengths that everyone seemed to find her irrational because she had stepped in to do the right thing. This was earned a dark look from the blonde though,   
“Yell at me again, and I’ll give you a real reason to scream.”   
Anne would smirk at this, and say something witty if her spirits weren’t so low, instead she become more sombre than before,  
“Are you done!? May I cover up again?”   
Ann regretted her sentiment immediately, and frowned,   
“I have seen you before – you do not have to be uncomfortable with me.”   
“But I am.” Anne muttered, and Ann steadied herself on her knees, standing between Anne’s legs, touching her cheek gently,   
“Is it because of things that Marian said? That people think you’re a man?”   
The hurt that flashed in the dark eyes told Ann she was right. It tugged at Ann’s heart and she kissed Anne fiercely on the lips, mindful of the wound on her chest.   
“Anne, you are perfect just the way you are. I love everything about you – all your curves and imperfections.”   
“People have mistaken me many times for a… man.” Anne mumbled, and Ann kissed her again,   
“They are just saying that to be hurtful! Because you are different, brilliant and clever – they feel threatened by you! Anne you are so handsome, so beautiful - don’t hide from me!” Ann ran her hands down Anne’s sides, feeling her curves as she placed soft kisses from her mouth, down her jawline and throat and over her naked and exposed breasts. Placing a last soft kiss over the bandage, looking up with a smirk,   
“There, all better!”   
Anne just stared at her with adoration and love, feeling as though her heart might explode with it for the woman in front of her, with teary eyes, and a trembling voice she said,  
“You know, I didn’t think it possible to find someone who would love me for who I was – exactly who I am - never in my wildest imaginations! There is none who I love as much as I do you, Adney!”   
“I love you too, but if you think that you can charm me into letting you out until that wound is healed – you are dead wrong.” Ann told her seriously and Anne chuckled despite it hurting her before kissing Ann’s corner of the mouth.   
“If you stay with me, believe me when I say, I won’t be wanting to leave.”   
Ann rolled her eyes humorously at her wife’s compliment. She knew it would be a hard few days trying to keep Anne indoors and out of scrapes. Her wife could be a right down baby sometimes she thought, but she was her wife and she loved her to death. Ann was chewing her lip as she thought, a bad habit of hers, and a growl from the throat of her wife forced her back to reality,  
“If you bite your lip one more time, I’m going to do it for you!”   
Ann blushed under her wife’s lustful stare, but then she smiled, and bit her lip once more, challenging Anne with a look.   
“Go on then, I dare you!”


	30. Gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gift 
> 
> Takes place just before Anne and Ann kiss on that hilltop in Halifax in episode 8... and the aftermaths in which Ann gives Anne a "gift".
> 
> This is the last inktober... and I am both a little relieved and sad - I mean I know this is not a masterpiece, but I enjoyed writing it. Didn't edit though and as I re-read some of the chapters I noticed some slips and spelling errors that were made in the haste of writing - but you know, eh I'm only human! I think we'll all survive.   
> It's not Shakespeare for God's sake! And actually if it was; the spelling wouldn't matter as the rules of spelling and writing didn't apply then. The man spelt his name in six different ways for crying out loud!

“I love you, Anne. I am in love with you and I am never leaving you again.”   
Then they kissed each other senseless, with such passion as never before – not caring that they were out in the open and could be seen (they weren’t). Anne’s frown seemed to wash away throughout the kiss, with the kiss, the worries melting away from her. The kisses tasted of salt from their shared tears, and when they finally broke a part, Anne took Ann into her arms holding her as close as she could, kissing the top of her head, tears running down her cheeks,   
“Please, don’t ever leave me alone!”   
“I won’t. I promise you!” Ann murmured against her chest, but then suddenly as if she just remembered Anne pushed Ann away from her, cheeks flaming red and Ann raised an eyebrow confused and shocked,   
“I am so sorry, Ann.” Anne mumbled embarrassed,   
“What?”   
“Oh, I, my feelings were running so high – I didn’t stop to think.”   
“Anne? What are you talking about?” Ann asked worried that something would ruin their happiness once more.   
“I haven’t had a bath in 15 days! I just arrived back – I smell of fish and sweat and I press you to me like that… it’s a wonder you haven’t been sick by the smell… and goodness, my breath! I didn’t even consider that – not that I haven’t cleaned my teeth as well as I could on a boat, but it doesn’t count.” Anne rambled on clearly mortified and when she stopped and looked at Ann with apologetic, panicked eyes, the blonde couldn’t help it – the laughter, the relief and happiness took over and it burst out surprising the woman. Anne just stared at Ann who was half-bent in laughter,   
“Ann?”   
Ann straightened herself, trying to stop laughing before taking Anne’s face in her hands and pressing a rough kiss to her lips, not once but twice, laughing in-between,   
“As if that would stop me! Anne, you could be covered in dung, and I would still kiss you, I would still hold you close – I have missed you with so much of my being that I hardly knew myself at times. Sometimes you are so silly! I am woman, not a porcelain doll!”  
Another kiss was pressed to Anne’s surprised lips but then she laughed with Ann,   
Ann smiled, leaning up for another kiss which was granted readily.   
“I am so pleased, nay so grateful that the Lord kept you with me. That you… that you didn’t…” Anne trailed off, clearly not able to finish the sentence and Ann frowned,   
“As am I… it was just a weak moment.”   
“No, not weak – you are not weak Ann. It’s just sometimes we square ourselves and are strong for far too long until we long for relief, a release. Not weak, never. Don’t have such a poor opinion of yourself!” Anne told her seriously, kissing her forehead, and Ann smiled,   
“You know I don’t, not when I’m with you.”   
“You keep saying that, and I keep wanting to tell you I feel the same. When I am with you, I feel… loved, I don’t feel odd and…” Anne trailed off, how should she phrase it best? But Ann took her hands in hers, smiling,   
“If that’s how I make you feel, I shall certainly never leave you again.”   
Anne smiled and shared a last kiss with Ann, standing close,   
“Anne…”   
“Mm?” Anne mumbled, resting in the embrace she shared with Ann, completely worn out after the long journey.  
“You know what I said before? About not caring what you smell like…”  
“Hm?”   
“I might have lied to steal a few kisses more from you… I actually wouldn’t mind you taking a bath now.”   
Anne laughed at Ann not insulted in the slightest, she merely kissed her nose,   
“Of course, I’m glad you said it. Because I feel filthy – and hey, I can barely stand the smell myself! I should’ve taken a bath as soon as I arrived back home but first, I had to beat some sense into Dr Kenny and then they told me about the flooded pits – Oh God… I took a gamble I shouldn’t have… it was dumb really – I shouldn’t have left Shibden.”  
“You punched Dr Kenny!?” Ann asked firstly and Anne tilted her head slightly,   
“Hm… yes. Against a bookshelf, he wasn’t equally thrilled about my smell…”  
Ann smiled small, she did not like that man at all, but then she frowned,   
“You said about the pits? They flooded?”   
“Mm. It just needs some money throwing at it, only I have already… huh, argh, I gambled Shibden.” Anne bit her lip, the frustration threatening to build up within her again, and  
Ann’s eyes widened,   
“You gambled Shibden!?”   
“Mm, I used the deeds to be able to loan £1500 from Mr. – I knew that if there were trouble with the pits, I wouldn’t be able to do anything in a long while – and risk losing Shibden et cetera, it was worth the risk though. But let us not dwell on that now, I will come up with something. Not to worry, I am always fine. “Anne said, trying to brush past her own folly and into other subjects but Ann was stubborn, she wasn’t stupid, she paused to think,   
“Anne… that doesn’t sound great. Let me! I have plenty of money.”   
“No, I will make do- I do not want you to think I am using you for your money – not like your… tribe of relations.” Anne told her seriously, holding her hand up but Ann frowned at her, marking her displeasure,   
“I am not letting you use me! - Anne Lister, I have a brain. I am not an idiot. I can think for myself, thank you very much, and I am not offering, I am saying that you are going to accept my money and that’s the end of it! If we are to be married, this will be mine too and I will not stand for it or the possible homelessness. Either you take my money, or you can kiss my…arse goodbye!”   
“Did anyone ever tell you that you can be quite fierce when you are angry?”   
“About the money, Anne. You will tell me tomorrow morning first thing how much you will be needing, and I will give you the money. Period.”   
“Fine. But I will pay you back. We will make a fair calculation and I will give you a percent in interest for every three months.”   
“We will see about that. Having my wife pay me money feels a bit fishy… you can take it you know?! – a wedding gift if you like.”  
“A wedding gift?” Anne grinned, she was so ridiculously happy at the moment,   
“Hm, here – Shibden back! I say it is a rather nice wedding present.” Ann smiled, and Anne laughed,   
“Mm, maybe too grand!”   
“What do you mean too grand? It’s only an old farm.” Ann teased and Anne shook her head at her, knowing it was only a tease and a reference to when Marian had called it that.   
“You know, it is oddly charming to have someone give me orders for a change… at least coming from you. Don’t get used to it though, I will have my way. ”   
“I think I’ll manage you, fine. After all I read Lysistrata.” Ann smirked and Anne laughed,   
“Who gave you that?!”   
“I may or may not have found it in my father’s old collection…”   
“Will you ever cease to surprise me, Miss Walker?” Anne snickered,   
“About that bath, Anne?” Ann began as they walked down the hill, and Anne glanced at her nodding,   
“Yes, I will take it as soon as we get back. If you will give me an hour – you can drink tea with my aunt and sister if you will – unless you want to go home first.”   
“No, I was going to say – that I’m not leaving you.”   
“You will watch me bathe?” Anne quirked an eyebrow, smirking, and Ann smiled back at her,   
“I will sit with you. I can avert my eyes until you’re soaked if you want. But I was serious about never leaving you again.” 

When they arrived back at Shibden and the bath was drawn for Anne, Ann stayed true to her word and averted her eyes when Anne undressed and didn’t turn around until she was in the tub hid by the soapy water. They sat comfortably talking whilst Anne bathed. Ann helped her wash her long hair with the lavender soapy water and rubbed her shoulders with it as well. Anne moaned softly, sinking into the bath, her tense muscles relaxing. Anne leant forwards at Ann’s bidding not thinking properly, as Ann was going to help her clean the rest of her back and she gasped dropping the soap in her hand,   
“What happened to you, Anne?” She mumbled sympathetically, running her fingers against the small scars draped across the small of her back and Anne froze, and tried to sit back again, hiding them but Ann wouldn’t let her, and Anne sighed,   
“My mother wasn’t always… she often resorted to thrashing when I was bad. She thought I was bad very often. I’m sorry, I know they are quite ugly it’s one of the reasons I like to cover up, why I am never... but as my mother used to say; you cannot further spoil an already ugly canvas.”   
Tears filled Ann’s eyes; how could anyone beat their child? Verbally abuse them. And to beat them so that scars remained years and years later. Ann ran gentle fingers over the scars, some more faded than others and then she placed her lips against one of them, and she could feel Anne’s skin prickle underneath.   
“Your scars aren’t ugly. They’re a part of you, and I love all of you. I… no one’s ever laying their hand on you again – ever. No one will hurt you again. You are stunning Anne, with your scars and because of everything you are not in spite of it.”  
Anne laughed at Ann’s statement because she could scarce see herself as anything like that though her heart did swell for the blond woman.  
“I love you, Ann!”   
It was the first time Anne had said that, out loud and meant it for real. She had never said it and been more convinced that it was the absolute truth. She was completely and utterly Ann’s to have and to hold. She who had accepted her for all that she was without asking for change. Without ever feeling ashamed of her. She who with every smile mended Anne’s broken heart and parts bit by bit. For even if she claimed that she’d rise above people’s comments and looks, from strangers, from family, the truth was that it hurt her more than she’d ever admit.   
“I, words aren’t enough to express just how much. How did I ever deserve someone so great as you?”   
Ann kneeled next to the bathtub, beaming,   
“Well then, you will just have to show me then.”   
And they kissed soft and slow, but suddenly Ann’s eyes popped wide, and she let go of Anne’s red lips who first pouted but then heard Ann cry,   
“Marian!? I mean, Miss Marian…”   
Anne turned her head and saw her sister standing in the doorway and her colour rose high, but Marian just stared at them and then sighed,   
“Oh, Am I supposed to be shocked now? I can pretend if you like.”   
“What?” Anne stuttered, “We weren’t doing anything, Ann was just keeping me company.”   
“Yeah… right. I was just going to ask whether Miss Walker is going to stay for dinner or not?”  
“Yes, please.” Ann murmured embarrassed, and Marian, who would tease her sister endlessly and not feel very guilty about it couldn’t watch poor Miss Walker like that – thinking that she would feel different about her.  
“By the way, I feel that I need to have it said; I do not care. You might think I am dull and dumb, but I am not cruel. This whole companionship thing – I get it. You are in love, and I think… I think that’s beautiful – and I am very happy for you to move in with us, Ann. And Anne, I am, despite all our disagreements so pleased that you are finally becoming more settled- I haven’t seen you this happy, I don’t think ever!”   
It was the first-time words had come out of Marian’s mouth in years that hadn’t frustrated or annoyed Anne, it was heartfelt, and she did feel it – though she would never admit that it was tears and not bath water that covered her cheeks. 

It was a good thing Ann had 'gifted' Anne Shibden back or that might also have been the last time Marian had said something kind to Anne... (you know before she killed her.)


End file.
